I did not call ahead. My daughter attended last year without me so knew a little about how it worked at the Italian lunch. She was scared of the lobster on the menu, so asked for "no lobster" and was given a few options to substitute. She also heard a lady who had allergies and they were accommodated. I've stayed away from F&W because I'm picky and assumed I wouldn't like anything.
At the Italian lunch, the menu is on the table. Since I don't eat red meat or pork, I started by asking the water girl if I could get no meat. She was the first person to the table, so I started with her. Then, a manager came to talk to me. She asked me if I had an allergy and I told her I was just part vegetarian. She gave me some options in place of the pork, and I went with the chicken dish. My daughter doesn't eat fish, so she substituted the fish for chicken. I was really impressed with the care from the manager. The food trays were right by me, and each course the manager would explain to the servers who was getting something different, one was no cheese, a few no pork, and one no ice cream.
At the "What's Cooking with..." I asked the server if I could get my brunch with no meat. Before the shrimp dish, they came by and asked if I wanted the shrimp and this is when my daughter also said no thanks to it and just asked for the grits. They served me something in place for the shrimp and brunch plate, but I'm not sure if it was tofu or fake meat.. I don't eat either of those..
I was most concerned about the Party for the Senses. My daughter attended last year, too, and assured me I would get enough to eat. I actually planned on getting fish and chips after, but didn't need to. At the tables it was a little confusing because most were already plated. Different tables expected me to know who to ask for a meatless plate, so I got scolded once for asking the wrong person. At one table, I asked for no meat and the guy asked me if I wanted the mushroom sauce, and as he started putting it on, the chef reminded him that it has bone marrow in it. There was one vegan item, one vegetarian item, a cheese table, and lots of vegetables. I do eat chicken, so I found enough to eat. Even without the one chicken dish, I would have been fine. I could have filled up on mashed potatoes!! Also, I got the red velvet donut without the candied pork, which I knew about because of Mix It, Make It.
I also did the French breakfast, but since it's a buffet, it was a non-issue. I didn't eat at any booths besides some cheese and desserts.
I'm always impressed with the way Disney handles food issues. I'm not sure why I thought F&W would be any different. I try not to put a burden on the servers and chefs and I never felt like anyone cared that I didn't want their food. I never left hungry and feel I got my money's worth at the events I attended. Since the menu isn't posted until you get there, I didn't feel bad telling them once I got there. Each time, I just mentioned "no meat" on my plate and then waited for them to give me options or just leave it off.