What would you do

[sam_gordon]

It would be beyond credulity that the OP's wife would have been brazen enough to take pictures of the subversive symbols with the woman of the house right there.

But isn't it also beyond credibility that the OP's wife would have been brazen enough to go into the garage WITHOUT the woman of the house right there?

 

[DeniseJH]

She is still an innocent child who is being discriminated against and prejudged. Some here have said that is always wrong.

Interesting - yes, I was talking about the protected classes, but this is an interesting question. Is SHE being prejudiced against or are her parents? Also, if a parent didn't want their child associating with the child of gay parents I'd certainly say that is wrong, but in the instance of racist parents you have the worry of what that child has been taught and may pass on to my child. Is that discrimination? I don't think so.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Two separate comments.

About the photos, I am sitting here thinking about how everybody is camera-phone and selfie crazed. While I do not think it is okay for the OP's wife to have taken those photos, and would be inappropriate, I think I can see that happening. I don't think it is beyond the realm of credibility. I am not assuming that she actually walked up into the garage and wandered around.
The bottom line is that if those photos were ever shared, that could possibly be an illegal invasion of privacy.

And, about Denise' comments above. Yes, there are two very different things here.
I do not believe that this would be discrimination. I do not believe that this is prejudice either.
Keeping your child away from somebody based on the fact that they are 'different' (gay parents) is prejudice and hate.
Keeping your child away from somebody who has openly shown prejudice towards your race because of superiority and hate, is protecting your child.

Discrimination is not really the issue here. Everybody has freedom of association, and, basically, not socializing with others because of valid reasons is just not discrimination. Nobody has a 'right' to socialize and associate with me or my child.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Interesting - yes, I was talking about the protected classes, but this is an interesting question. Is SHE being prejudiced against or are her parents? Also, if a parent didn't want their child associating with the child of gay parents I'd certainly say that is wrong, but in the instance of racist parents you have the worry of what that child has been taught and may pass on to my child. Is that discrimination? I don't think so.

It is interesting. If the parents are what they appear to be, then I don't have an issue with staying away from them as a choice. But when it comes to the child, most here have said they would not allow their child to play with her because of her parents' beliefs. That's where it gets sticky for me.

Discrimination, definition
the unjust or prejudicial treatment of different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex.

Were it not for the parents' beliefs, presumably this would be an ok friendship.

Now let's say the parents were a protected class, we'll use your example of gay parents, or those in a same sex marriage, say. Parents of neighborhood child find out unexpectedly that parents are gay, and that's not something they are ok with, so they will not allow their child over the house or encourage their friendship at all, including in school. Would people be ok with this?

Some have called it by different names here, but it still smells like discrimination and prejudgement to me - when it comes to the little girl. There's no evidence whatsoever that the girl is going to be hate filled herself, nor do we know for sure whether the parents even are. We just *think* so based on some items seen in a garage taken out of context.

But Denise, thanks for at least considering what I'm trying to say, even if you disagree.

 

[ronandannette]

But isn't it also beyond credibility that the OP's wife would have been brazen enough to go into the garage WITHOUT the woman of the house right there?

It's all absurd really, compared to what any of us would probably ever do. But if I had to pick one scenario that's at least sort of believable, it would be that the OP's wife snapped a quick picture when the resident's weren't looking.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Still have to respectfully disagree with that, Pea-n-Me.
I agree with everything except that, because of some alleged discrimination, I can't decide who my friends are.
I've never heard of any Discrimination Law that would apply to personal friendships.
I choose my friends. My child chooses their friends. As a parent, if I feel that there is a real detrimental effect on a friendship on my child. At that age, yes I would have the right to deal with that.

I do understand that you really feel for this little girl!!!!
But, in reality, I don't see that in school and out in society she will really be totally discriminated against or shunned.
She seemed to be playing with kids on that playground.
I just can't believe that all parents in that community are going to know or care.

And, on the other side. If the OP's little girl is Hispanic and would appear to be Hispanic (whatever that is)
I really don't believe that their child will be totally discriminated against and 'shunned'.

The reality is, kids have to kind of bear the side effects of their parents decisions and beliefs and feelings.
Good or bad.
Many kids might not have close friends that they can invite over to their house for many reasons....
If the parents are in poverty, drugs, or whatever... They simply will do without bringing other kids, their friends, into that situation.

You simply can not dictate or legislate that.

It really can't be called prejudice either when it is an true judgement call on an individual based on information. (not just a demographic)

 

[DeniseJH]

Of course you can't legislate who can, or should, or must, be friends with whom - but that doesn't make the shunning of a child a pleasant thing. I agree with the poster(s) who said that it would be good for the child to have friends, and be exposed to "better" people than her parents, but to that point that friend's parents would have to be quite proactive to make sure the child of the racists wasn't poisoning her mind in any way. I don't think the age of the children in question was mentioned - they may, or may not be old enough to know better on their own. It would be wonderful for some child's parents to take this on, but I wouldn't fault the parents who weren't willing to. Sad for the kid though, for sure.

 

[sam_gordon]

I am not assuming that she actually walked up into the garage and wandered around.

So what do you think happened?

The bottom line is that if those photos were ever shared, that could possibly be an illegal invasion of privacy.

I'm not sure there's an expectation of privacy when a garage door is left open. It would be an interesting court case.

 

[DeniseJH]

So what do you think happened?

I'm not sure there's an expectation of privacy when a garage door is left open. It would be an interesting court case.

Not a lawyer but I think a garage is still considered private property even if the door is open, wouldn't they have had to be invited in? (Original post doesn't make that clear.)

 

[Southernmiss]

Of course you can't legislate who can, or should, or must, be friends with whom - but that doesn't make the shunning of a child a pleasant thing. I agree with the poster(s) who said that it would be good for the child to have friends, and be exposed to "better" people than her parents, but to that point that friend's parents would have to be quite proactive to make sure the child of the racists wasn't poisoning her mind in any way. I don't think the age of the children in question was mentioned - they may, or may not be old enough to know better on their own. It would be wonderful for some child's parents to take this on, but I wouldn't fault the parents who weren't willing to. Sad for the kid though, for sure.

Children are pre k. Starting k in the fall. So about 4

 

[DeniseJH]

It is interesting. If the parents are what they appear to be, then I don't have an issue with staying away from them as a choice. But when it comes to the child, most here have said they would not allow their child to play with her because of her parents' beliefs. That's where it gets sticky for me.

Discrimination, definition
the unjust or prejudicial treatment of different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex.

Were it not for the parents' beliefs, presumably this would be an ok friendship.

Now let's say the parents were a protected class, we'll use your example of gay parents, or those in a same sex marriage, say. Parents of neighborhood child find out unexpectedly that parents are gay, and that's not something they are ok with, so they will not allow their child over the house or encourage their friendship at all, including in school. Would people be ok with this?

Some have called it by different names here, but it still smells like discrimination and prejudgement to me - when it comes to the little girl. There's no evidence whatsoever that the girl is going to be hate filled herself, nor do we know for sure whether the parents even are. We just *think* so based on some items seen in a garage taken out of context.

But Denise, thanks for at least considering what I'm trying to say, even if you disagree.

Thank you.

I question though, what category does the child fall into that could make this "discrimination"? What are the guidelines that determine whether or not someone or some group would fall under this precept? (Kind of rhetorical.) Could "children of racists" be a group, or category? Perhaps one could argue that. Nevertheless, I feel for that kid.

 

[DeniseJH]

Children are pre k. Starting k in the fall. So about 4

Yikes - very young.

 

[kiddo76]

Is there such a thing as a Reverse Godwin's Law?

 

[sam_gordon]

Not a lawyer but I think a garage is still considered private property even if the door is open, wouldn't they have had to be invited in? (Original post doesn't make that clear.)

Yes, the garage would still be private property, but that doesn't mean there's a reasonable expectation of privacy, especially if the garage door is open. Generally, you're free to take pictures of anything "the public" can readily see. However, if you are on private property and told to stop taking pictures, then you need to. I'm not sure there would be a legal case for someone going in to an open garage, taking a picture of something in the garage, and then posting it online.
https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/question-unauthorized-use-of-photo-28285.html

 

[Colleen27]

I think "It takes a village" has a lot of meanings, not just to us here and now, but universally. Not all children are fortunate enough to have an ideal home situation for whatever reason, and so others "in the village" act as supporters and mentors to that child so that they can survive and thrive despite their problematic circumstances. How many adults have we heard stories from saying they wouldn't be where they are were it not for x, y and z? I think this girl needs the village, but the village won't be there for her, apparently. Except for hopefully a few who can see past whatever deficiencies or evils her parents have.

I know how important that can be in a young person's life. I've been blessed to be "mom" to far more than the three kids I gave birthed, and I'm a parent-volunteer and coach at my girls' school. But I also know that sometimes, there's a tension between helping another child and protecting your own. Particularly when it comes to trying to help a child whose parent(s) don't think there's anything wrong with what they're doing, which I'm sure this family doesn't. And let's be honest - white supremacists, on whole, aren't known as level headed and open to constructive criticism. I personally wouldn't want to be the scapegoat if he felt like someone/something in the community was undermining the beliefs he hopes to pass on to his child, especially not if I were in the OP's (alleged ) shoes as a member of a minority group.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I know how important that can be in a young person's life. I've been blessed to be "mom" to far more than the three kids I gave birthed, and I'm a parent-volunteer and coach at my girls' school. But I also know that sometimes, there's a tension between helping another child and protecting your own. Particularly when it comes to trying to help a child whose parent(s) don't think there's anything wrong with what they're doing, which I'm sure this family doesn't. And let's be honest - white supremacists, on whole, aren't known as level headed and open to constructive criticism. I personally wouldn't want to be the scapegoat if he felt like someone/something in the community was undermining the beliefs he hopes to pass on to his child, especially not if I were in the OP's (alleged ) shoes as a member of a minority group.

Fair enough. I hear what you and others are saying. I guess I see it differently because I think that even difficult or evil people can sometimes see when you're trying to help them, or in this case, befriend their child. I mean, I never said I would try to change the child's beliefs; I said I would likely let the children play together on the playground and perhaps welcome her into my home, where she may, in the course of her time with us, see that there was another way of being, which could be life changing for her. I'm not really into shoving my beliefs down anyone's throat (and recognize that could get me in real trouble in this situation).

In my work I have to care for sometimes abhorrent people who have done bad things in life, often incarcerated. Generally when I've treated them respectfully, they've been respectful to me, in turn. This is where my thoughts lie. I've also found it to be true of other ethnicities I work with, too: kind and respectful often begets kind and respectful. (Obviously not all of the time, but probably more often than not.) Basic humanity on a primal level transcends many differences. I've seen it over and over with people from all walks of life.

The OP said the Mom was really nice, and the child was nice too. That's, as far as I can tell, two thirds of their family, and tells me that there is something good about them somewhere (or this story is a crock, one of the two). There are too many holes in the story not to give them, especially the child, the benefit of the doubt. If they prove themselves to be abhorrent people, then decisions can change.

 

[SaintsManiac]

Anyone who thinks this scenario is made up obviously hasn’t lived in Louisiana at some point.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

Anyone who thinks this scenario is made up obviously hasn’t lived in Louisiana at some point.

I can't speak for Louisiana, but I've spent my entire life living in 3 different Southern states. I think the story is made up & have said that from the beginning. There are definitely white supremacists in all areas of the country, but this particular story doesn't add up. Attempting to incite people only hurts the cause of people who are trying to support those who are discriminated against. That really annoys me. Without going into politics, that's all I can say.

 

[LSUmiss]

Anyone who thinks this scenario is made up obviously hasn’t lived in Louisiana at some point.

I’ve definitely seen my share of confederate flag waving racists here. But, I have not met anyone who claims to be an actual white supremacist or neo-nazi. I’m not saying they don’t exist here & I also believe this situation is completely plausible, but I really haven’t experienced it.

BTW...how about those Tigers!!!

 

[SaintsManiac]

I’ve definitely seen my share of confederate flag waving racists here. But, I have not met anyone who claims to be an actual white supremacist or neo-nazi. I’m not saying they don’t exist here & I also believe this situation is completely plausible, but I really haven’t experienced it.

BTW...how about those Tigers!!!

You’re in NOLA though. Different situation.