10 year forced to wear thrift stoores clothes as punishment

[Liberty Belle]

I'm not sure why people are saying that this reinforces that thrift stores are bad. It specifically says that the mom purchased clothes intentionally that *she thought her daughter wouldn't want to wear*. She didn't go to a thrift shop and let her daughter pick out whatever cute clothes she wanted, she found a cheap source of clothes that she knew her daughter wouldn't like. I don't think the thrift store is the point of the punishment, so much as the ugly/uncool clothes.

This wouldn't be the particular discipline I'd give my kids, but I can't figure out for the life of my why it would be news or why anyone would be upset about it.

I'm learning anything can be news nowadays, but the part that upsets me is I don't feel like humiliation is a good way of teaching a child. And "upset" isn't the right word, I just don't agree with it at all.

 

[Annadesu]

When my sister and I were younger, she tried screaming at my mom about how all her clothes "sucked", and everyone else at school had better stuff than her. My mom promptly took every outfit she had, minus one, and told her she had to do chores to earn the monetary value of the clothes to get them back. Example: $10 worth of work for her t-shirt back. That shut her up real fast. lol Different punishments work for different kids. I'm not gonna' sit here and judge this woman for trying to make her kid be more decent.

 

[Hikergirl]

When my sister and I were younger, she tried screaming at my mom about how all her clothes "sucked", and everyone else at school had better stuff than her. My mom promptly took every outfit she had, minus one, and told her she had to do chores to earn the monetary value of the clothes to get them back. Example: $10 worth of work for her t-shirt back. That shut her up real fast. lol Different punishments work for different kids. I'm not gonna' sit here and judge this woman for trying to make her kid be more decent.

Perfectly stated.

 

[EveDallas]

It's ok. We don't mind buying it and it's not like he demands it. He begged for a pair of Lebron's about 3 years ago. I got it for him for Christmas. Ever since then it's been name brand sneakers. He uses his birthday and Christmas money to buy sneakers and his father and I probably buy him 2-3 additional pairs a year. He's a good kid that doesn't give me any problems. Him wanting name brand sneakers are the least of my worries.

Well, this is a bit different and I would probably buy them in this case too. Your first post made it sound like he demanded you buy him nothing but brand name shoes.

 

[CarolAnn856]

Well, this is a bit different and I would probably buy them in this case too. Your first post made it sound like he demanded you buy him nothing but brand name shoes.

I didn't interpret her post that way at all. I think you possibly took "but his sneakers must be name brand" too literally. I read it as an exaggeration, just as someone might say that they were going to "die of embarrassment."

 

[Dread Pirate]

Apparently I'm abusing myself, since I buy a lot of clothes at thrift stores. I find a lot of great stuff, in great condition, and wonderful prices

 

[dollarmite]

Things like this make me so glad that most schools where I live have uniforms. Everyone's on an even playing field, at least clothes wise.

 

[NotUrsula]

Thing is, the child CHOSE the clothes, though she did not realize at the time that she was choosing them for herself. This is from the ABCNews story:

After talking with Kaylee about the bullying proved unsuccessful, Olsen and Kaylee's dad, Mark Lindstrom, decided Olsen would take her clothes shopping. Their shopping destination, however, was not a mall but a thrift store, where Olsen had Kaylee select the ugliest clothes she could find. "She would pick out stuff and say, 'Mom, this is the ugliest thing I have ever seen,' and I would say, 'Oh yeah, put that in the cart,'" Olsen said. For the next two days, to Kaylee's surprise, Olsen and Kaylee's dad made the girl wear the clothes she had picked out to school. "Terrible" is how Kaylee described the bullying she herself received as a result. "I [was] like, why would they do that to me," she said of her classmates' taunts. "I'm still a normal person. It doesn't matter what you wear." Kaylee told Mathison she appreciates the lesson learned. She also now describes her relationship with the girl she bullied as "sisters." Olsen and Kaylee's dad say they wanted to put Kaylee in her friend's shoes, literally.

I know that on several occasions I've taken my kids to thrift stores to shop for horrible Halloween costumes, only to walk out with several more items that they asked for because they wanted them for ordinary wear. I don't think that the mother's strategy implied that thrift stores are bad at all. There is good and bad in every shop, used clothing or not. The point is having the skill to tell the difference, and not everyone does. (My late MIL, bless her heart, was the only woman I have ever known who was totally incapable of understanding what colors actually suited her. It could have been the highest fashion item on the planet, and she still would have chosen a color that made it look awful on her.) Unless the kid was lying for the news media, it looks like she actually learned the lesson that they wanted to teach her, and she doesn't sound too terribly traumatized by it.

My mother was fond of aphorisms, and her favorite one was, "Some people just won't be told." When I was little I didn't understand what that meant, but as I grew up I learned to appreciate it. There are some people for whom advice and education simply don't work when it comes to changing their behaviors and attitudes. Some people truly have to learn life's lessons from personal experience, and yes, sometimes that hurts, but if it makes you a better person, then that is probably worth some pain.

 

[monsterkitty]

Several years ago I had a student who prided herself for buying all of her clothes at Goodwill. 8th graders can be mean and some were making fun of her. She pointed to one of the other girls, who had the same pair of jeans on, how much she paid for her jeans. One girl paid $75 for the jeans and one paid $3. When the girl who got her jeans at Goodwill went to pull something out of her pocket, she also pulled some folded money that had been washed before the jeans were donated. She had a few $1 bills and a $50 bill that were in the pocket of the $3 jeans! No one made fun of her after that!

 

[Magpie]

Several years ago I had a student who prided herself for buying all of her clothes at Goodwill. 8th graders can be mean and some were making fun of her. She pointed to one of the other girls, who had the same pair of jeans on, how much she paid for her jeans. One girl paid $75 for the jeans and one paid $3. When the girl who got her jeans at Goodwill went to pull something out of her pocket, she also pulled some folded money that had been washed before the jeans were donated. She had a few $1 bills and a $50 bill that were in the pocket of the $3 jeans! No one made fun of her after that!

Well, that's lucky... except, as someone who wore/wears donated clothes as well, I am also a bit shocked that she (or her mum!) didn't see fit to wash the jeans themselves (and check the pockets) before throwing them on.

I remember hearing about that boy who got poisoned by his jeans:

http://www.humbleisd.net/site/handl...&FileName=The_Mystery_of_the_Poisoned_Boy.pdf