An ex calls you out of the blue...

I only have one ex and I would love to see him, but only to find out what he did with his life. However it'd have to be in a way that would honor both our spouses. It would be too weird to have all four of us go out for dinner and I wouldn't feel right contacting him on social media. We'd almost have to just randomly accidently meet in a public place and "catch up" for a few minutes something we could both tell our spouses about. . I heard he was happily married (years ago)as am i, but I'd love to know how his life has turned out, how his family is doing etc. He was a friend first and foremost. We dont' live in the same state so chances that we'll ever touch base again are rare.
 
There is only one EX that I have purposefully lost contact with. I wouldn't talk to him for any reason.
Other than that, I am friends with my EXs. Not a big deal, DH has met a few of them.
I wouldn't get back together with them, I have been married for 23 years now, but as friends, for a dinner, sure. I would invite DH though.
 
It really depends on the ex and the reason for breakup. If the ex is a complete loser/jerk/idiot, then no. If the ex is a great person and the break up was because the romance just didn't work out, then yes, nothing wrong with being friends, but no rekindling romance (didn't work!). Personally, I don't have any good exes. All mine are jerks/losers/idiots. So no.
 


It depends on the circumstances, but generally no (I’m married though, so I’m answering as if I were single).

I have two significant exes. I’m Facebook friends with one and we have had nice chats a couple of times we have bumped into each other, although we don’t deliberately hang out. He’s gay though, so that does make a difference. He’s lovely and we have a lot of interests in common.

The other one was a great guy and we split up for reasons out of our control, so in theory I might meet up with him again. In reality, he went down a bad path several years after we broke up, and now our lives are very different and, frankly, I don’t need that kind of toxic stuff (drugs, heavy drinking, crime etc) in my life. It’s very sad, and a tiny part of me does want to contact him to find out what happened, but there’s no way I would actually do it.

Generally I think that people are exes for a reason.
 
I wouldn't, personally, since I am married. But DH and I met sophomore year of college and dated a while and got engaged but broke it off during senior year (we were just too young and had some oats to sow). Then we both graduated and got jobs. Almost a year into that working adult life, I contacted DH which led to him asking me out that weekend and here we are now, married almost 22 years. So if OP is single and the ex was not abusive or an addict, I would vote yes to a meet up.
 
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I'm in the "depends on the ex" camp. There is one I would definitely meet again. Then again, there are others I would be horrified to hear from.
 


So the details if anyone cares. The "breakup" was only a few months ago, he just stopped calling or answering my calls/texts. I think he just wasn't ready/able to be in a serious relationship (it started out casual but was developing into more). For me I was there, I was ready, I was in love with him and told him as much.

I am/was finally in a good place and moving on. I don't believe that he is ready and I am not sure I want to go back there with him and get hurt again. I did not meet him.
 
If I was single there is one ex that might be able to get my attention. There wasn't a lot of acrimony in our breakup, we're FB friends/occasionally run into each other, and he's a good guy. But the thing that was a deal-breaker while we were together would probably still be a deal-breaker today (he didn't and still doesn't want kids; I did and now have three). And since we're both happily married, it is a particularly unlikely hypothetical.

Other than him and my son's father, who I would NEVER entertain a relationship with, my exes are all of the high school boyfriend variety, without enough emotional baggage to be any more desirable or undesirable relationship prospect than a total stranger would be.
 
No. That would be so weird.

The last time I saw my ex, I was very pregnant with my daughter, walking with my husband. His eyes bugged out of his head. I guess he didn’t realize that I had moved on lol.
 
OK this reminds me of a story I heard last year. I was co-teaching a summer school class with a woman I had never met. After being in the classroom for a few hours on the first day, the aides took the kids out to recess and she and I were getting a few things organized. Suddenly, she launches into a story about her ex-boyfriend. They lived together for over a year, traveled together, then out of the blue, he asked her to move out. She was still friends with him on Facebook and knew that he had started a new relationship just a few months later. A few months after that, he called her and asked her out for dinner. She said, "But aren't you dating someone?" He said, "Yes, she's coming too. I think the two of you would really get along." So she was curious enough to go to the restaurant. She said the new girlfriend was actually very sweet, but she still didn't quite know why she was invited to have dinner with them. At one point, she asked the girlfriend, "Do you know why he asked me to come here?" The girlfriend said, "Yeah. He wants us to be a trio!" I think different words were actually used, but you get the idea. She got up and left and never talked to them again.

I kind of stared at the woman, wanting very much to say, "Why are you telling me this?" But I just said, "Um, OK," and I went out to recess. An aide I know from another classroom came over and said, "Are you teaching with Ms. R?" I said, "Yep." She said, "She subbed for us last year. Has she told you about her ex-boyfriend yet?" I said, "Yep." The aide said, "Yeah, she tells everyone that story." We both just stood there and shook our heads. So I guess if an ex asks you out, you never know what might happen. And then you can tell everyone you meet all about it!
 
As a married man, no. Answering as if I were single, still “no” with one exception (on again, off agin HS/college GF who was heading down a very different path in life than me at the time).
 
I'm like others; it would depend on which ex...one I try hard not to run into; the other I run to when things are hard.
 
No. The one ex I had was a cheat and semi-functional alcoholic. He reached out to me after several years via email, but I ignored it. I assumed he was in a bad place and needed some fool to leach from. Some years after that, I saw him on the road while driving home. He pulled up on the motorcycle that would end up killing him later that year. I gave an awkward closed-lip smile and pulled forward. Message received.
 

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