Any tips for an impatient tween?

bell_ed28

Earning My Ears
Joined
Jan 10, 2018
Hi all,

my DF and I began taking annual trips to DW in 2013, problem is that lately I think the magic has began to fade for my little brother. He's at that age (11) where he gets to be very impatient and tires easily if we do not do what he wants to do lol. My mother and I are interested in the shopping aspect of the parks as well as the character dining experiences. Sadly my 3 brothers and father do not all share that same interest but at least they tag along and keep the complaining to a minimum.

With our 2018 trip coming up in October, it looks to be the last for a while and I want my little brother to enjoy it fully. Any tips to pry him away from splash mountain to experience more of the parks? I'm perfectly fine with him sticking to the rides he enjoys (everybody loves splash mountain) but seeing him get deflated each time someone mentions finding nemo the musical makes me feel as though he's maybe not getting the most out of these memories.

P.S we plan on attending Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party, any costume ideas for a tween? is the trick or treat trail worth the effort?

Many thanks!
 
Hi all,

my DF and I began taking annual trips to DW in 2013, problem is that lately I think the magic has began to fade for my little brother. He's at that age (11) where he gets to be very impatient and tires easily if we do not do what he wants to do lol. My mother and I are interested in the shopping aspect of the parks as well as the character dining experiences. Sadly my 3 brothers and father do not all share that same interest but at least they tag along and keep the complaining to a minimum.

With our 2018 trip coming up in October, it looks to be the last for a while and I want my little brother to enjoy it fully. Any tips to pry him away from splash mountain to experience more of the parks? I'm perfectly fine with him sticking to the rides he enjoys (everybody loves splash mountain) but seeing him get deflated each time someone mentions finding nemo the musical makes me feel as though he's maybe not getting the most out of these memories.

P.S we plan on attending Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party, any costume ideas for a tween? is the trick or treat trail worth the effort?

Many thanks!

My boys were pretty much done with Disney by that age, especially since they had been and done it before. They rode what they wanted and didn't bother with the things they weren't interested in.
I think trying to force someone to have the memories you want them to have isn't really the way to go. If it were me, I'd let him do the ride he wants, and sit out the ones he doesn't.
Does he want a costume for MNSSHP? When my boys were young they were OK with just wearing a Disney themed Tee and Mickey ears to the party. By 11 they weren't even willing to wear any Disney apparel. Make sure he is OK with whatever your plan for him is, and have him pick out what he wants to wear.
 
Never been to MNSSHP so I can't help you there. As for your other question, is it possible for your family to split up some during the trip?

The reason I ask is because our family has a similar issue. Usually it's me and my parents and we have widely different tastes. Mom likes shopping, rides and touring the resorts, Dad prefers rides and relaxing at the hotel and I'm a show junkie. So while we do spend a good bit of time together on trips, since we typically stay on site, we go with the agreement that we are not bound to do EVERYTHING together and it's worked well for us. For instance, on our upcoming trip, since we have an extra day to go where we like, I'm spending it at MK doing M&Gs which is something I've been wanting to do for a while. My parents have absolutely no interest in doing that so they're going to take their time at the room, do a little touring and relaxing and then meet up with me later.

Now I realize your little brother's only 11 and that may be too young for your parents to feel okay with leaving him alone in a park. But since your mother and you have a common interest, why not do a mother/daughter activity such as a character meal together while your father and brothers do something they all enjoy together and then meet up later in the afternoon? If that's not an option, I'd recommend trying to make some kind of plan as to where you're planning on going and have everyone pick one or two activities they absolutely want to do. That way, there's already a prearranged agreement that everyone has the opportunity to do what they want. Sometimes, knowing what the plan is beforehand can help with the 'deflation'.
 
My son was 14 on our last trip. I let him spend half days and even a full day just chilling in the hotel room by himself. The deal was he had to hang out cheerfully with the rest of us at other times. I'd definitely suggest splitting up more. If he doesn't want to watch Nemo, what about letting him go get a snack and wait for u guys?

My favourite time was taking my son for a date night. We had an amazing time and it was wonderful. He dropped the bored teen thing and was a kid with his mom again.
 
Split up! I would be miserable shopping and waiting to meet characters. On our last trip, I must’ve been distracted, because all of a sudden my family ended up in line at a character meet, why they wanted to meet adults in costumes, I’ll never know, but majority ruled. Fortunately my parents were with us, so we could divide and conquer.
 
We have all girls so I can't help much with 11 year old boys, sorry! We love the Halloween party and have went 3 times as a group of eight people, all ages. I ironed on Team Mickey and a number on baseball jerseys and we wore baseball shorts. We were Mickey's baseball team. We got a ton of comments and I loved that we were cool and comfy. I think the Halloween party is one of Disney's best events and shouldn't be missed. Have fun.
 
I’d divide up and let him do the rides he wants. My twins were 12 on our last trip and it was definitely a different experience from when they were younger. I enjoyed my 7 year old more. He and I went to Epcot while my husband took the twins to ride Everest a dozen times.
 


Why can't you split up for the things only some people want to do? Those who don't want to watch Nemo can ride Everest or whatever and meet up when you're done. My oldest ds hasn't wanted anything to do with characters since 12 or so, and we don't force it. Character meals are too expensive to take someone who doesn't want to be there (as long as another adult is ok skipping it).
 
Hmmmm......what does your brother like? Could you entice him to watch some Star Wars films at home or get him into pirates (or the princesses if he likes that)? I know a lot new Disney fans came when the WD Company purchased new franchises such as Star Wars and I can definitely say it had the reverse effect on me (Disney fan who now likes Star Wars too). If this doesn't work, I suggest splitting up for park days.
 
Realize you can't force someone to enjoy what he doesn't like. I would aim to have some experiences you all can enjoy together (like FP to 7DMT or the like) but otherwise, I wouldn't try to force it and instead let the troop divide and conquer. Is there a particular type of food he likes? Maybe try a new dining experience even if it is without characters. I think if you give him the chance to do what he likes with your dad and other brothers, seems like it will be the best way for him to have a more magical experience. Maybe just share some information on the newer thrill rides and stuff to see that might interest him and let him work with the others from there.
 
I have 14 and 10 year old boys. While they like to souvie shop some when at Disney that's certainly not their main focus and they would lose interest fast. And, honestly, in all our Disney trips we've never watched Nemo. Everyone has different things they want to do when there and you can't force him to do things you think are cool for memories unless you want him to remember hating that trip.
I would say it's a hard no on a costume - or would be for my boys. But they would probably wear a Halloween shirt.
 
Hi all,

my DF and I began taking annual trips to DW in 2013, problem is that lately I think the magic has began to fade for my little brother. He's at that age (11) where he gets to be very impatient and tires easily if we do not do what he wants to do lol. My mother and I are interested in the shopping aspect of the parks as well as the character dining experiences. Sadly my 3 brothers and father do not all share that same interest but at least they tag along and keep the complaining to a minimum.

With our 2018 trip coming up in October, it looks to be the last for a while and I want my little brother to enjoy it fully. Any tips to pry him away from splash mountain to experience more of the parks? I'm perfectly fine with him sticking to the rides he enjoys (everybody loves splash mountain) but seeing him get deflated each time someone mentions finding nemo the musical makes me feel as though he's maybe not getting the most out of these memories.

P.S we plan on attending Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party, any costume ideas for a tween? is the trick or treat trail worth the effort?

Many thanks!

It sounds to me like a good place to start would be to let the boys go off and do what they want while you and Mom go shopping. Breaking off into groups and letting each group do what they want and not subjecting them to doing so much of the things they don't want to do will cut down on the complaining.

Secondly, in my family, we all make a list of the things that are most important to each of us to do in each park or each day, and we make sure that we all get to have as many of our 'must do' list as possible. Yes, my teenager will not be happy that we are riding RockNRollercoaster, but he can sit on the wall outside and wait if he doesn't want to ride with us. When the guys want to go run around and play sorcerers of the magic kingdom, I go get a Dole Whip and sit and people watch. But we have some things that we know we are all going to do together.

And with the teen/tween crowd, I find that letting them make some of the decisions makes them much happier. "Ok, we have a while before our next fast pass, would you rather get a snack and go see Country Bears or go ride Haunted Mansion on standby?" and then do what they pick. Then the next time, let someone else pick. When they feel like they have some control and aren't just being dragged around, they are much happier.
 
I wish I had advice for you but I have girls. I was the one who had to learn to love shopping. We do 2 days at each park and they do one day in town shopping, you might try a variation of the rule I use (depending on your schedule) I am allowed to make fastpasses on assigned shopping days and I have to go with them. On pure park days we do not go into a gift shop unless a ride ends there.
 
OP - I am assuming you are a teenage girl/young woman... sorry if I'm wrong. But I am going to play devil's advocate and rewrite your post from the perspective of your brother...

Hi all,

my DF and I began taking annual trips to DW in 2013, problem is that lately I think the magic has began to fade for my big sister. She's at that age (teenager) where all she wants to do is shop and eat at fancy restaurants. My brothers and father and I are interested in riding all the cool rides! Sadly my sister and mother do not share that same interest but at least they tag along and keep the complaining to a minimum.

With our 2018 trip coming up in October, it looks to be the last for a while and I want my big sister to enjoy it fully. Any tips to pry her away from the shops and restaurants to experience more of the parks? I'm perfectly fine with her sticking to the things she enjoys (everybody loves Chef Mickey's) but seeing her get deflated each time someone mentions Splash Mountain makes me feel as though she's maybe not getting the most out of these memories.


I understand where you're coming from. It would be great if everyone in the family loved the same things, or at least happily went along and didn't mope about it. But if he's been to Disney every year since he was a toddler, it's natural for the magic to begin to "fade". I have a 12 year old son. This March will be our third trip to Disney and he has things he can't wait to do, and things he has no interest in. He has ridden Tomorrowland Speedway with his Dad while his little sisters and I met princesses. He has done Agent P missions in Epcot while his little sisters and I ... met princesses. :) The girls are over meeting princesses now, but we will still split up sometimes, and I think that's fine.

On the other hand, there are going to be times when he has to do things he doesn't want to. That's just part of being a (relatively large) family. Sometimes he's going to just have to suck it up. You can't worry about helping him make the most of his memories. Let your parents worry about his attitude, and just focus on your own fun.

As for the Halloween party... totally up to him if he wants to dress up. My son would happily dress as a character from Star Wars, but that may not be typical for his age. The party is fun for everyone, though. You don't have to do the "trick or treat trail". You can just hit the stations as you're passing by if the lines don't look too long. You do get a LOT of candy.
 
At 9, my DS really loved that we did some special experiences with just him and an adult. My DH took him on a fishing excursion (fishing in Epcot, so cool!), and I did the Star Wars dessert party with him.

I also made sure he had some input in the restaurants.

But I echo the PP in splitting up the party. If they like to ride Splash Mountain, then let them ride Splash Mountain
 
As others have mentioned, split up. Also, you might have your parents look into a at Universal - maybe for all of you or maybe just for the "boys". They have a lot more rides that tweens / teenagers enjoy.
 
Never been to MNSSHP so I can't help you there. As for your other question, is it possible for your family to split up some during the trip?

The reason I ask is because our family has a similar issue. Usually it's me and my parents and we have widely different tastes. Mom likes shopping, rides and touring the resorts, Dad prefers rides and relaxing at the hotel and I'm a show junkie. So while we do spend a good bit of time together on trips, since we typically stay on site, we go with the agreement that we are not bound to do EVERYTHING together and it's worked well for us. For instance, on our upcoming trip, since we have an extra day to go where we like, I'm spending it at MK doing M&Gs which is something I've been wanting to do for a while. My parents have absolutely no interest in doing that so they're going to take their time at the room, do a little touring and relaxing and then meet up with me later.

Now I realize your little brother's only 11 and that may be too young for your parents to feel okay with leaving him alone in a park. But since your mother and you have a common interest, why not do a mother/daughter activity such as a character meal together while your father and brothers do something they all enjoy together and then meet up later in the afternoon? If that's not an option, I'd recommend trying to make some kind of plan as to where you're planning on going and have everyone pick one or two activities they absolutely want to do. That way, there's already a prearranged agreement that everyone has the opportunity to do what they want. Sometimes, knowing what the plan is beforehand can help with the 'deflation'.
We’ve tried splitting up a few times before but it usually ends in a small argument; my dad takes my brothers off to go on as many rides as they can while my mum and I go around the shops and end up waiting past the agreed meet up time. I obviously understand with waiting times for different rides, they are likely to be late to regroup at the designated time and place but I think a large part of it has to do with my mum being so protective of her kids and wanting to know where they are, if they’re safe etc. and as you said already, my brother is only 11 so she will worry if he’s alright when he’s not in her sights.

I feel as though planning out our day according to everyone’s interests should have been obvious before now lol I’ll take note and try it, thank you!
 
We have all girls so I can't help much with 11 year old boys, sorry! We love the Halloween party and have went 3 times as a group of eight people, all ages. I ironed on Team Mickey and a number on baseball jerseys and we wore baseball shorts. We were Mickey's baseball team. We got a ton of comments and I loved that we were cool and comfy. I think the Halloween party is one of Disney's best events and shouldn't be missed. Have fun.
Thanks! That idea sounds adorable, my dad has already expressed interest in family shirts so we may try it after all!
 
Hmmmm......what does your brother like? Could you entice him to watch some Star Wars films at home or get him into pirates (or the princesses if he likes that)? I know a lot new Disney fans came when the WD Company purchased new franchises such as Star Wars and I can definitely say it had the reverse effect on me (Disney fan who now likes Star Wars too). If this doesn't work, I suggest splitting up for park days.
Just before our 2 week trips to WDW, he usually wants to binge watch Disney films and that peaks his interest enough for him to want to take pictures with some characters. My family recently had a trip to WDW in November without me and apparently he’s open to trying all the rides now so I suppose that gives us more ground to work with !
 

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