For those in retirement age and who splurged or was over conservative in your youth....

There is a saying I love that balances the need to splurge and enjoy life, without YOLOing one's way to becoming broke and dependent upon others for even daily necessities.

"You can do anything, but you can't do everything"

I like that. Do you know what it is from?


Thanks, Stacy: I can't pinpoint exactly where I first read it, but it was advice given on the topic of how much you need to retire/how to retire with less, etc.
 
As with anything in life, I think it is about balance. My father is a money hoarder to the point where he is so cheap, he makes things difficult on himself. So I have learned to not be that extreme.

We have saved for retirement and my husband who is older than I am has quit his main career and is pursing some different options. I am at my peak earning years. We are aggressive savers. However, we never had children, so we are not paying for college or worried really about leaving an inheritance.

I am trying to find balance, because I also want to die with as close to $0 in the bank as possible. At this point (and I do not mean this to sound selfish), we do not have anyone in particular that we feel the need to leave a huge financial legacy too.

However, I do not spend $400 or $550 on a hotel room either, even though we can afford way beyond that. I think if spending that on a hotel room is reducing the amount you can save for other priorities (like college or retirement) then it may be too much.
 
i haven't read that particular study but most recent ones i've see show this kind of disparity to largely only exist in entry level positions that require a high school diploma or less with the disparity decreasing or the opposite with positions that require higher level education.

makes sense-an entry level job in the public sector is going to come w/a benefits package that no private employer would dream of offering for a comparable job (med/dental/vision w/ lower premiums, 2-3 weeks paid vacation your first year, pensions/life insurance/ltd....) all that puts those positions WAY above the private sector compensation. then you start getting into the ones that require a bachelors, masters or higher and the numbers take a down turn-it's not like the benefits packages improve, unless you're doing upper level management it's pretty much the identical benefits package your high school educated subordinate is getting. more recent wage studies show those with a professional degree or higher earn on average 18% LESS than their private sector counterparts. so why do they stay? where i retired from it was simple-most didn't come in with those higher level degrees and by the time they had them they had built up enough time with the public sector that a private sector's benefit package/pension (if offered) wasn't worth jumping ship for.

saying this-public sector jobs aren't what they once were. the benefits that enticed allot of us into going in and kept us around have been greatly reduced or entirely eliminated. when i hired in the 80's we had guaranteed access to health insurance upon retirement-NO MORE. my former employer stopped that with new hires years ago so they better plan to stay around until they qualify for medicare and can afford a supplement on their own. pensions are still there but they've been reformed (some for the good imho, some not so much) and many pensioners are facing much lower pensions than they anticipated b/c the concessions they made during the recession to retain their jobs have not been caught up with-so they earn less than they did over a decade ago and they will never earn what they anticipated their pension would be based on.

And full disclosure, I AM in California and that is a state where public sector pay is greater. My son just got a state job, from a very well paying private sector job in computer IT. His pay went up 40%, he has a pension and a 401k now, and was overwhelmed with the benefit options.
 
To me a 100,000 a night room does not make a memory it is the people you are with that make memories....
With that said some money is for saving some is for spending how one spends it is a personal choice... Some find value in an expensive hotel (a 500 a night room at Disney is not expensive) some find value in an expensive car some find value in an expensive house some in expensive food some in a big bank account some can have one choice some can have a few some more and most less. what ever you choose a part of your life is sacrificed and that includes making a lot of money to pay for it as it is just not handed to you... high paying jobs come with high levels of stress and being available on vacations, weekends, weeknights or when ever needed....Do what you want with your money but never cheat yourself out of something else...
 


My particular outlook is based on my personal experiences and family history. As the youngest born to parents aged 40 and 45, I have had to watch everyone in my family become ill, some of them pass on.

My mother died of cancer at age 62, never having the opportunity to experience retirement. My father had his first heart attack at 57. I performed CPR and saved his life. He lived well into his 80's, in and out of the hospital with heart disease and cancer, never got to travel and live out his retirement dreams, and was too ill to walk me down the aisle at my wedding. My sister battled cancer, survived but is home-bound. She is in her 60's, retired, and her only travels are in an ambulance to the hospital. My brother, also in his 60's, has not officially retired and works mostly from home. He is battling cancer, and was released from the hospital yesterday recovering from Legionnaires Disease. His retirement will be official in January. He cannot leave his house either. He had major retirement plans to travel which are now cancelled.

I'm not saying that I will be sick like my family. I just know that at 54, I get tired more quickly, have pain from arthritis and a knee injury that will eventually require a knee replacement. I have 9 more years until I retire with a pension. DH has a pension and a 401K. I'm not waiting to enjoy my life 9 years from now.

I'm enjoying my life today.
 
If you are good at what you do, age isn't a factor.
If only that were true! Age-ism won't affect every older worker, but it affects a large number. Writing of all those workers, assuming they're all bad at their jobs is blaming the victims /ignoring the problem.
On the subject of pensions, almost every one offers a type of insurance that you can purchase that will continue to extend a portion of your pension payment to a surviving beneficiary for the remainder of his or her life.
Yes, that's true -- I thought about writing about this pension detail, but I thought I was already being long-winded.

Lots of pensions do allow you to "insure" your spouse /leave a portion of your pension to your spouse if you predecease him or her -- but it's worth noting that these choices are fairly expensive. That is, to assure yourself that your spouse can inherit a portion of your pension, you must accept a reduced pension. It's an expensive choice.
My pension is also the reason I stayed in education when I felt burn out. It's hard to walk away from that.
I've heard it called "golden handcuffs". You're far enough into your career that you can't afford to walk away from your pension.
 
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If only that were true! Age-ism won't affect every older worker, but it affects a large number. Writing of all those workers, assuming they're all bad at their jobs is blaming the victims /ignoring the problem.
Yes, that's true -- I thought about writing about this pension detail, but I thought I was already being long-winded.

Lots of pensions do allow you to "insure" your spouse /leave a portion of your pension to your spouse if you predecease him or her -- but it's worth noting that these choices are fairly expensive. That is, to assure yourself that your spouse can inherit a portion of your pension, you must accept a reduced pension. It's an expensive choice.
I've heard it called "golden handcuffs". You're far enough into your career that you can't afford to walk away from your pension.
Exactly right
 


As to the pensions going to a surviving spouse

Dh retired from our state at a young age and took on career #2.

He opted for the surviving spouse option since I worked part-time while our kids were young and would need the income. And at the time dh retired, our kids were still in high school and younger.

It really wasn't that expensive, maybe $100 or $200 a month to take the surviving spouse option.

We had just watched his mom whose husband had retired at age 58 and then died at age 66 lose her spouse's retirement income at his death.
So his employer came out way ahead. We were a bit baffled as to why he would not have chosen survivor benefits .

When dh was preparing to retire, his organization had a retirement seminar we both attended that really explained our options and showed us all scenarios.

Folks just need to be informed and weigh things out for themselves.
 
As to the pensions going to a surviving spouse

Dh retired from our state at a young age and took on career #2.

He opted for the surviving spouse option since I worked part-time while our kids were young and would need the income. And at the time dh retired, our kids were still in high school and younger.

It really wasn't that expensive, maybe $100 or $200 a month to take the surviving spouse option.

We had just watched his mom whose husband had retired at age 58 and then died at age 66 lose her spouse's retirement income at his death.
So his employer came out way ahead. We were a bit baffled as to why he would not have chosen survivor benefits .

When dh was preparing to retire, his organization had a retirement seminar we both attended that really explained our options and showed us all scenarios.

Folks just need to be informed and weigh things out for themselves.
Well put.
 
I've heard it called "golden handcuffs". You're far enough into your career that you can't afford to walk away from your pension.

I am absolutely "handcuffed" to my position. I am fortunate to be working in a new school building, and I have a lovely classroom. I get a grant that helps with supplies. Most teachers get nothing and have to use Donors Choose or fund everything themselves. However, I work in a very rough inner city school system, and there are times that I just want to walk out the door and never look back. I can't do that. I've put in too many years, and make too high a salary to just leave and start over somewhere else. If I ever did leave, it wouldn't be to teach anyway. The biggest issue is the difficult parents, and they are everywhere.

The only solution for me is to teach in an orphanage.
 
As to the pensions going to a surviving spouse

Dh retired from our state at a young age and took on career #2.

He opted for the surviving spouse option since I worked part-time while our kids were young and would need the income. And at the time dh retired, our kids were still in high school and younger.

It really wasn't that expensive, maybe $100 or $200 a month to take the surviving spouse option.

We had just watched his mom whose husband had retired at age 58 and then died at age 66 lose her spouse's retirement income at his death.
So his employer came out way ahead. We were a bit baffled as to why he would not have chosen survivor benefits .

When dh was preparing to retire, his organization had a retirement seminar we both attended that really explained our options and showed us all scenarios.

Folks just need to be informed and weigh things out for themselves.

Yep, this happens a lot, sadly. For us, it will cost 6.5% of the monthly pension payment for 35 years (and then it's paid up but coverage continues) if we opt for the pension insurance. That works out to roughly $300 a month, which is absolutely worth it for us as I am currently a SAHM and will need that income if something happens to my husband. That amount is also taken out pretax, so it reduces the taxable income by as much.

I have heard of military retirees dying within months of separating from active duty and they didn't chose the pension insurance for their spouse. I don't want to be one of those stories. Men in my husband's family have all died young, unfortunately. :(
 
I have heard of military retirees dying within months of separating from active duty and they didn't chose the pension insurance for their spouse.

We are a retired military family. I think that somehow or another, the situation you are referring has some jumbled facts. Let me explain.......

---If someone is on active duty they can pay a modest monthly amount for really good life insurance. If they die while on active duty, the money is paid to the beneficiary. This product is called SGLI (servicemembers group life insurance)
---When someone retires, they have the option of paying a somewhat modest amount to allow the spouse to collect a pre-chosen percentage of the retirement pay. If they die during retirement, a monthly check continues. This product is called SBP (survivors benefit plan)

I wanted to make sure that civilians did not read your shared story and have a misunderstanding about how the military member can provide for the spouse upon death.

I typed this up based off the top of my head and did not do any research. We retired in 2001. If I have posted bad info, someone speak up and I will edit it.
 
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We are a retired military family. I think that somehow or another, the situation you are referring has some jumbles facts. Let me explain.......

---If someone is on active duty they can pay a modest monthly amount for really good life insurance. If they die while on active duty, the money is paid to the beneficiary. This product is called SGLI (servicemembers group life insurance)
---When someone retires, they have the option of paying a somewhat modest amount to allow the spouse to collect a pre-chosen percentage of the retirement pay. If they die during retirement, a monthly check continues. This product is called SBP (survivors benefit plan)

I wanted to make sure that civilians did not read your shared story and have a misunderstanding about how the military member can provide for the spouse upon death.

I typed this up based off the top of my head and did not do any research. We retired in 2001. If I have posted bad info, someone speak up and I will edit it.

This thread is about retirement. My post was in regards to SBP (a.k.a. "pension insurance). Since SGLI ends upon military retirement (as in, the same day), if a servicemembers doesn't elect SBP coverage, and dies the day after they retire, the beneficiaries are left with nothing (assuming there isn't other life insurance in place). I have personally known 2 people who dealt with this (their husbands didn't die the day after, but both were less than 6 months after retirement). I have heard countless more stories where SBP was waived and later regretted.

And, FWIW, SGLI isn't "very good" insurance coverage. It's only $400,000, which is not nearly enough for anyone, never mind a service member with a spouse and children. The problem with it is that the coverage is the same regardless of rank, even though in the real world, insurance coverage is based on your income.

Military members earn their retirement pensions. Choosing to leave potentially a few million dollars on the table because one thinks paying a couple hundred dollars a month to insure that income is a waste of money, is very foolish, IMO. There is no life insurance product in existence that can match the potential payout of the SBP for the price.
 
My DH works for a county government and will get a pension at retirement. The way his works is he can collect 100% while he is alive, or sign up so that he will have spousal benefits for me when he dies. That is what we're going to do!

Then what happens is he gets a reduced pension from day one that will continue at the same amount to me when he passes. Off the top of my head I'm not sure of the % of pension we get when we do it that way. It's reduced but that's the way we're going.
 
My DH works for a county government and will get a pension at retirement. The way his works is he can collect 100% while he is alive, or sign up so that he will have spousal benefits for me when he dies. That is what we're going to do!

Then what happens is he gets a reduced pension from day one that will continue at the same amount to me when he passes. Off the top of my head I'm not sure of the % of pension we get when we do it that way. It's reduced but that's the way we're going.

just want to share with you based on personal experience (dh and i are both retired county employees-but from different counties)-for retirement planning purposes, education yourself NOW on how the survivor medical works w/your dh's county. with mine while dh will continue to be eligible to half my pension AND can continue on the health/dental medicare coordination of benefits plans to cover what medicare doesn't, my employer pays ZERO contribution for survivors so dh could either turn over the bulk of that 50% of my pension or will need to quickly get another supplemental plan. survivors are shocked when they get notification from benefits of how much their next premium will be if they continue to stay on their existing plans so since now is traditionally the time of year when open enrollment occurs take a gander at your dh's county's benefit website and pull up his retiree group retiree and survivor premiums. it's better to have a rough idea of how it works.
 
just want to share with you based on personal experience (dh and i are both retired county employees-but from different counties)-for retirement planning purposes, education yourself NOW on how the survivor medical works w/your dh's county. with mine while dh will continue to be eligible to half my pension AND can continue on the health/dental medicare coordination of benefits plans to cover what medicare doesn't, my employer pays ZERO contribution for survivors so dh could either turn over the bulk of that 50% of my pension or will need to quickly get another supplemental plan. survivors are shocked when they get notification from benefits of how much their next premium will be if they continue to stay on their existing plans so since now is traditionally the time of year when open enrollment occurs take a gander at your dh's county's benefit website and pull up his retiree group retiree and survivor premiums. it's better to have a rough idea of how it works.

Believe me I am! The past couple of years I've been participating in every retirement webinar they have! DH is 54 and could retire at 58 with a full pension but plans to work till 62. BUT now he is hearing rumblings of a buyout being offered in 2 years and thinks if they add on time to get him to a full pension he'll probably take it.
 
Believe me I am! The past couple of years I've been participating in every retirement webinar they have! DH is 54 and could retire at 58 with a full pension but plans to work till 62. BUT now he is hearing rumblings of a buyout being offered in 2 years and thinks if they add on time to get him to a full pension he'll probably take it.

our counties never offered golden handshakes but i knew people who worked for other counties or the state that gladly took up those types of offers. the webinars are great for information and another great edifier is if there's any kind of retired public employee's association connected to his employer b/c even if you're not a member yet you can look at their websites and frequently find out what they are talking about/concerned with-this gives a good idea of certain issues you can deal with before the actual retirement takes place. i also regularly check out the monthly agenda on-line for the retirement board for my county-keeps me in the loop on what they are up to w/managing all the monies entrusted to them.
 
I'm surprised at just how many people are opting for the share-with-spouse pension option -- it all depends upon your circumstances, but my personal impression is that most of coworkers are taking max-amount-for-the-worker. The cost of sharing the pension is pretty high, and the surviving spouse receives a lesser amount. I know I will be taking the max pension. My husband is older than I am, and he deals with an ongoing medical condition. In all likelihood, I will outlive him. Will that be the right choice? It's impossible to answer that question today.

Regardless of what choice you make, it's important that everyone has more than one source of retirement income -- a pension alone isn't going to be enough. People used to talk about retirement savings as a "three legged stool" -- that descriptor seems to have disappeared from popular culture, but the concept is still good: The idea was that you aim to have 1) a pension, 2) personal savings, and 3) Social Security. A person who has these three things is still "safe" if one should fail or be reduced. Personally, I'd add something else to the three: a paid-for house. If you own your home, your monthly expenses are reduced drastically.
 
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Believe me I am! The past couple of years I've been participating in every retirement webinar they have! DH is 54 and could retire at 58 with a full pension but plans to work till 62. BUT now he is hearing rumblings of a buyout being offered in 2 years and thinks if they add on time to get him to a full pension he'll probably take it.
Yep, I'm attending everything that's offered, and I know my own company's specifics backwards and forwards. I'm a bit dismayed at some of my co-workers who aren't interested in the specifics! How can you not be interested in the details about your finances for the rest of your life? I'm thinking of a friend who retired 2-3 years ago who didn't realize until she put in her paperwork for retirement that her pension wouldn't be the same as her current paycheck. Uh, yeah, that's not a secret.

If your husband can retire with a full pension at 54, I suggest he take it ... and then pick up a part-time job. With a pension check + a part-time check, he would probably have about the same amount of money he has now -- BUT he'd be earning it in half the hours he's spending now. That's my plan. If he waits 'til 62, things could happen -- adding on time is just one of the possibilities. Once you're "in the system", you're more safe from changes, and I suspect changes would be likely to benefit the company instead of the worker.
 
^Mrs. Pete the elephant in the room is medical benefits. I only work pt with no benefits of my own, my DH carries them for our family. When he retires the county will cover him (I'm not sure on the kids? still learning) but not me :sad1:. We can buy my benefits through his plan but not sure on the costs at this point.

He will be getting another job, hopefully closer to home as he has been driving an hour away for all of his career but the pay was better in the big city for what he does. Hopefully, in a couple of years our two oldest will be started on their careers and carry their own benefits, but we will still have DS20 who will be in college.

At one time we would've all been covered under his retiree medical plan but after the recession all that changed, understandably. We'll pretty much be set with all of our savings, his pension, I have a small pension and I will get SS (he doesn't)...but the unknown about healthcare is what keeps me from feeling confident about him retiring early.
 
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