How do you deal with bad days?

[usnuzuloose]

I pray

 

[Bianca and Bernard]

How do you deal with those times in life when things seem to keep going wrong? Any sayings or anything that helps you see the bright side? How do you remind yourself that the rough times are temporary?

Wine.

No, not really.

But I take a deep breath, and go have a good cry in the bathtub.

Take it one day at a time. If that seems overwhelming, I focus on making it work one hour at a time.

I have a "bad time" journal. I only use it when I'm having a rough go at life. All the negative stuff goes in there, and then when the rough patch is over, I put it away in my private drawer until the next time. I don't read back over what I've written; I don't censor or change what spills out. What is written is what it is.

 

[PollyannaMom]

If it's just been a couple of bad days - a comfort-food dinner, or a glass of wine, snuggling on the couch with pets and watching a movie, just giving yourself the night off.

For a longer rough patch - I definitely second a gratitude journal!

For "preventative medicine" - build self-care into your day (or week) - morning coffee rituals, hobbies, something to look forward to. (Planning trips, even small day outings, in advance, is also good for this!)

 

[mom2rtk]

OP, this can be really hard when you have small kids and demands are coming at you from all sides.

Do you have friends you can talk to? That always helps me more than anything else. It helps if they are going through the same stage of life and dealing with the same things. It makes them more supportive in a way someone in a different stage of life might not be.

 

[Klayfish]

Life is like a box of chocolates...

Yes, that's a joke, but it's also my serious answer. Poop happens. That's life. I have some great days, some horrible days. I'm not a very "reflective" kind of person, so maybe I'm the wrong person to ask. Every day is different. Just because today was bad doesn't mean tomorrow will be. Just because tomorrow was good doesn't mean the next day will be.

Another analogy I'll use...from an old movie. I'm not a movie person at all, but this sort of sticks in my head. It's from the '80's movie "Parenthood". There's a scene where one of the characters (was it Steve Martin's character?) asks the grandmother (who is very elderly) how she managed to get through all these trying times in life. She goes on to describe how life is sort of like a roller coaster. It goes up, it goes down. You have to learn to enjoy it all, as it's a thrilling ride, and that she enjoyed that far more than the merry go round, which just went in circles...or something like that...that's the premise of what she's saying, I don't recall the specific lines. I completely agree with that philosophy.

EDIT: Google is my friend. Here's the exact quote from the movie Parenthood:
Gil has been complaining about his complicated life; Grandma wanders into the room]

Grandma: You know, when I was nineteen, Grandpa took me on a roller coaster.

Gil: Oh?

Grandma: Up, down, up, down. Oh, what a ride!

Gil: What a great story.

Grandma: I always wanted to go again. You know, it was just so interesting to me that a ride could make me so frightened, so scared, so sick, so excited, and so thrilled all together! Some didn't like it. They went on the merry-go-round. That just goes around. Nothing. I like the roller coaster. You get more out of it.

 

[rkstocke5609]

Music is always one of the best answers....

Watch, repeat.

 

[scrhsa]

First and foremost I pray for strength! Then I'm reminded of the phrase( Churchill is said to have said it but I'm not sure) " If you are going through Hell, keep going!". My Mom used to always tell me that it could always be worse and then remind me of how bad some other people have it! Usually, after I have my pity party, I will then give thanks for it not being as bad as it could have been! An in amid all that, I will eat chocolate

 

[Wishing on a star]

OP, I am so sorry if you are having a hard time!!!
Many of us have faced some very tough, or dark, times....

I don't have any magic-bullet advice.
But, reading your post, I would focusing on the word 'temporary'.
That is huge!!!!

For me, right now, we have faced THREE very tough things... over the holidays and into frigid January.
It has been enough to make we want to wish for death.
Hopefully, these things will be temporary.... But, personally, I am dealing with challenges that will only get worse over time.
Knowing that these things will absolutely not get better.... THAT is what is so, so, bad.

Hang in there!!!!!!

 

[Mizzoufan]

Lots of prayers and hugs from my kids and lots of comfort foods

 

[MIGrandma]

Personally, I think of my MIL when I'm having a bad day. My "bad day" is never anything compared to her many bad days. She suffered for several years with Lou Gehrig's disease, or ALS. She was so brave, and cheerful, and always had a positive outlook yet she suffered greatly from it. Nothing I have endured so far compares at all with what she had to endure.

And I count my blessings. I go outside for a walk, breathe in the air, look up at the blue sky and sunshine, listen to the birds, and just be grateful that I have the ability to go for that walk, and have my sight and hearing. I am thankful for everything I have.

Also, I remember "this too shall pass."

 

[Mokat76]

First I use all the cuss words—usually internally. I sulk. Then I love on one or more of my pets and let them love on me. And I think of all the folks I know with far worse days/weeks/months/years. I realize my bad days won’t last. Chocolate.

 

[Imzadi]

Sometimes you just have to STAND through it. . .

 

[dosekies]

lol I don't deal with them and that is part of my problem. I have severe anxiety and depression and have never dealt well with bad days. I get cranky, easily agitated, and stressed out. I typically will drink lots of extra coffee (or wine if I am at home), snuggle on the couch with my dog, eat too much, and take a nap.

 

[marcyleecorgan]

So much hot chocolate!

 

[Happyinwonerland]

A good workout helps me to think things through, it is the only time when I get to zone out. Usually by the end I have either come up with workable solutions to my problems , or have remembered that everything is temporary and there is good to come.

If it is a really, really bad day I cry a bit, veg out, and drown my sorrows in chocolate.

 

[kimmar067]

....I kick back with few COLD ones......MILKSHAKES, that is.....

 

[dish rag]

Just wait for the next day to arrive.

 

[Snowysmom]

I try to do something for myself each day whether it is reading or watching a favorite TV show. It lets you get away for a little while. This is especially true when going through tough times. I also find chocolate is a good comfort food. 2017 was a tough year. So many books were read and so much chocolate was consumed.

 

[Lori74]

I have very dark days, usually not circumstances but depression. First i take care of myself as well as possible. Plenty of sleep, right foods (mixed with comfort foods). Excersise, mostly walking in fresh air. Do these things take away the problems? Absolutly not, but you can deal with them much better when your body and soul are prepared. A temporary thing, i like to read, it can transport me away for a little bit. Lastly, ask for help. This is probably the hardest. My best to you!

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

Thanks for all the kind words and ideas. The ideas aren’t just for me, they are for other family members who are having a tough time as well. Most of my bad days are because I’m worrying about what-ifs.