Kid and cell phones

No offense, but if you don't have a cell phone of any kind and still use a paper atlas, then you are in the far extreme minority. If it works for you, then that's fine, but I think it's not realistic or fair to impose those beliefs on your kids. I don't text (only with DW on rare occasion), but I realize I'm in the extreme minority and don't impose those feelings on my kids.

If you don't want DD to be glued to a screen all day, then don't let her. That's in your control. It'll be up to you on how "locked down" you want it. We don't have our kids locked down at all, and never have, but that's just our decision.

I think another thing to think about is that technology proficiency is a skill people expect in the workplace. Every once in awhile we’ll get someone new in the volunteer agency I’m involved in that doesn’t have basic knowledge of cell phones, iPads, computers, etc. It’s a huge handicap and typically that person doesn’t stay since they are so behind the curve. Most workplaces don’t have the time to bring their skills up to par.

I completely understand wanting to limit screen time and not be tied to a phone but I think it’s also important to recognize that people have always needed to adapt to new tools or lose their competitive advantage.
 
No offense, but if you don't have a cell phone of any kind and still use a paper atlas, then you are in the far extreme minority. If it works for you, then that's fine, but I think it's not realistic or fair to impose those beliefs on your kids. I don't text (only with DW on rare occasion), but I realize I'm in the extreme minority and don't impose those feelings on my kids.

If you don't want DD to be glued to a screen all day, then don't let her. That's in your control. It'll be up to you on how "locked down" you want it. We don't have our kids locked down at all, and never have, but that's just our decision.


Totally agree. You’re still the parent. If your kid is on their phone all day it’s because you aren’t getting them to do anything different.
 
First, not looking for judgements or debates. :grouphug:

My DS is turning 10 in November. He keeps asking for a phone. I keep saying no. But I hear so many kids lately that have them. So it made me wonder...

When did your kids first get a cell phone or when are you planning to first get them one?

When my daughter was 6(almost 7) we had moved into a new home and there were lots of kids in our court that she was playing with, sometimes in our home or a neighbors so I felt a little nervous sending her out and at the time there was a Firefly cell phone that basically you would program a few numbers in it like Mom and Dad. Made me feel better she had it.

I forget the ages we got her a basic cell phone but it was before she was 13 plus we got her an IPod so she could text. At 16 we got her an iPhone. She loved getting it so she wouldn’t have to carry two devices around anymore.
 
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This is such an interesting thread to an oldtimer like me who btw got her first cell phone when I was 51!!

What's crazy in my world is my 15 month old grand son face times me every Saturday (he lives 2 hrs away) and he does most of the holding of the phone. He babbles to me and gives me "gramma" kisses by way of technology. Crazy crazy but I love it. :love: I told my son (his Dad) that that boy will be getting his own phone by preschool!! :rotfl:
 


DD9 doesn't generally get dropped off. We stay and watch most of them. Exception is Girl Guides which has a start and finish time. I drop her and arrive about 5 minutes before the meeting ends. She has a computer at home to get email, and knows how to use an iPad, so it not like she doesn't know how it works, she just doesn't need to have it on her all the time. The school sends out email notices and the same with her teachers to MY email. Her school has class set of chrome books for use in class. Apparently even the high school doesn't allow outside devices (non school owned) to connect to the school internet, so to use their phones at school the would be using there own data. The students and parents sign a contract saying they won't use the phone during class time and if they do, the phone WILL be confiscated and it can pick it up at the end of the day at the office. We have to sign permission forms for our kids to use the school internet (which I do agree to). I think learning to use the internet is a great tool, but should be done in open view if the teacher and class.
 
Oh, no. Not true at all. Among my high school students, phones are absolutely the #1 fashion accessory /prestige item. They want to be seen carrying their phones in their hands /headphones in their ears between classes ... who has a new phone is big news ... cool covers are "a thing". In addition to "Best All Around", senior superlatives now include "Best Social Media Presence" and "Selfie King/Queen". Kids care more - way more -- about phones than clothing and cars combined.

That's not what I meant.

What I mean is, the CONCEPT of just *having* a phone is not a "thing", not WHICH phone or how awesome it is. Everyone in every generation will find something that is a must have brand, style or color, or whatever, but that isn't what I was talking about. The topic is about kids gettting a phone (any phone) in the first place, like it's still this novel idea that may ruin a kid's life. My point is, is it really that big of a deal anymore that kids have cell phones?

I guess it is, to some. I feel the tide has turned. Kids don't have all of the emotional baggage about (having a) cell phone the way their parents do. To kids, having a phone is just...having a phone. I don't think they feel like it's a life-changing event like some adults might think.

Of course they all want the latest and greatest, and want to use their phones ALL the time, but again, that's a different topic than the one the OP is asking about.

Again, YMMV.
 
No offense, but if you don't have a cell phone of any kind and still use a paper atlas, then you are in the far extreme minority. If it works for you, then that's fine, but I think it's not realistic or fair to impose those beliefs on your kids.
No, I disagree. If you want to use a cell phone as a navigator, fine. But using an Atlas or map isn't a "belief" that's being imposed on kids. Using an Atlas or a map is a skill, a skill that gives you an overview of the area in which you're traveling. Here's an example: Let's say you've never been to Disney World (okay, maybe that's a bad idea 'cause just about everyone knows it's in Florida -- make it Tweetsie Railroad; not everyone can name the town where it's located), but you agree to drive by yourself and meet your friends. If you just get into the car and punch information into your phone, you have no idea where you're going ... you don't know if you're headed into the mountains or across a lake ... you don't know whether you're going to pass 10 miles from a cool factory outlet mall ... you don't know anything except the simple line that leads you to your destination.

BOTH are valuable, and failing to teach your kids Atlases /maps because you consider them outdated is just as short-sighted as refusing to use GPS. In a perfect world, when you're about to embark on a trip, you'd check a map to see the overall area to which you're headed ... get a general idea of whether you'll be traveling on interstates or backroads ... and once you have that general idea in your mind, you'd punch your information in and use the GPS as a turn-by-turn.

It's kind of like some of my students who claim they can't read an analog clock. They're missing a basic life skill.

I think another thing to think about is that technology proficiency is a skill people expect in the workplace. Every once in awhile we’ll get someone new in the volunteer agency I’m involved in that doesn’t have basic knowledge of cell phones, iPads, computers, etc. It’s a huge handicap and typically that person doesn’t stay since they are so behind the curve. Most workplaces don’t have the time to bring their skills up to par.
The "digital divide" is very real -- even among young people. About 2/3 of my students are competent with technology ... but about 1/3 of them are not comfortable with anything except using Google to search the 'net. I mean, those kids genuinely don't know how to print only page one of a three-page document ... don't know how to save /retrieve a file from a flashdrive ... don't know how to merge files ... can't format a word processing document without just "spacing over" ... you know, simple things. That's the digital divide.

What I mean is, the CONCEPT of just *having* a phone is not a "thing", not WHICH phone or how awesome it is.
Ehh, yeah, they're pretty hung up on HAVING the phone too. For a pretty big number of my students, their lives literally revolve around those little boxes.
 


No, I disagree. If you want to use a cell phone as a navigator, fine. But using an Atlas or map isn't a "belief" that's being imposed on kids. Using an Atlas or a map is a skill, a skill that gives you an overview of the area in which you're traveling. Here's an example: Let's say you've never been to Disney World (okay, maybe that's a bad idea 'cause just about everyone knows it's in Florida -- make it Tweetsie Railroad; not everyone can name the town where it's located), but you agree to drive by yourself and meet your friends. If you just get into the car and punch information into your phone, you have no idea where you're going ... you don't know if you're headed into the mountains or across a lake ... you don't know whether you're going to pass 10 miles from a cool factory outlet mall ... you don't know anything except the simple line that leads you to your destination.

BOTH are valuable, and failing to teach your kids Atlases /maps because you consider them outdated is just as short-sighted as refusing to use GPS. In a perfect world, when you're about to embark on a trip, you'd check a map to see the overall area to which you're headed ... get a general idea of whether you'll be traveling on interstates or backroads ... and once you have that general idea in your mind, you'd punch your information in and use the GPS as a turn-by-turn.

It's kind of like some of my students who claim they can't read an analog clock. They're missing a basic life skill
The bold is simply not true. You can get an overview of your trip in any map app, plot your route, mark places you want to stop at, find places to eat, get gas etc. You can actually see landmarks as they are if you want. You also have the added bonus of speed limits, road construction warnings, accident warnings and a visual of what lane you need to be in. We’re not a bunch of blind sheep heading out and just hoping for the best, lol.
 
No, I disagree. If you want to use a cell phone as a navigator, fine. But using an Atlas or map isn't a "belief" that's being imposed on kids. Using an Atlas or a map is a skill, a skill that gives you an overview of the area in which you're traveling. Here's an example: Let's say you've never been to Disney World (okay, maybe that's a bad idea 'cause just about everyone knows it's in Florida -- make it Tweetsie Railroad; not everyone can name the town where it's located), but you agree to drive by yourself and meet your friends. If you just get into the car and punch information into your phone, you have no idea where you're going ... you don't know if you're headed into the mountains or across a lake ... you don't know whether you're going to pass 10 miles from a cool factory outlet mall ... you don't know anything except the simple line that leads you to your destination.

BOTH are valuable, and failing to teach your kids Atlases /maps because you consider them outdated is just as short-sighted as refusing to use GPS. In a perfect world, when you're about to embark on a trip, you'd check a map to see the overall area to which you're headed ... get a general idea of whether you'll be traveling on interstates or backroads ... and once you have that general idea in your mind, you'd punch your information in and use the GPS as a turn-by-turn.

The bold is simply not true. You can get an overview of your trip in any map app, plot your route, mark places you want to stop at, find places to eat, get gas etc. You can actually see landmarks as they are if you want. You also have the added bonus of speed limits, road construction warnings, accident warnings and a visual of what lane you need to be in. We’re not a bunch of blind sheep heading out and just hoping for the best, lol.

I was about to say exactly this. My app gives me much more than a "simple line that leads to my destination". I get all of the above plus alternate routes in case of accidents, etc.
 
I think that knowing how to use a paper map/atlas is EQUALLY as important as knowing how to used google maps, especially in an emergency. and atlas will never run out of wifi /data or power in a catastrophic event. We have cell phone and a landline. That land line has cordless phones and 2 corded phone attached to it. We had a snow storm a couple of years ago guess what worked? Only the corded phones, the old rotary dial and analogue push button ones. They had enough charge coming through the telephone wire to call out and receive calls to family that still had power. The cell phone were useless as the internet and cell towers were damaged and not fixed for a few days.
 
I think that knowing how to use a paper map/atlas is EQUALLY as important as knowing how to used google maps, especially in an emergency. and atlas will never run out of wifi /data or power in a catastrophic event. We have cell phone and a landline. That land line has cordless phones and 2 corded phone attached to it. We had a snow storm a couple of years ago guess what worked? Only the corded phones, the old rotary dial and analogue push button ones. They had enough charge coming through the telephone wire to call out and receive calls to family that still had power. The cell phone were useless as the internet and cell towers were damaged and not fixed for a few days.

We actually just got rid of our landline. An added expense that wasn’t used in I don’t know how long (besides using it to find our cell phones :rotfl:) so we cut it out. I think about just these situations that stress me out over the loss.
 
The bold is simply not true. You can get an overview of your trip in any map app, plot your route, mark places you want to stop at, find places to eat, get gas etc. You can actually see landmarks as they are if you want. You also have the added bonus of speed limits, road construction warnings, accident warnings and a visual of what lane you need to be in. We’re not a bunch of blind sheep heading out and just hoping for the best, lol.

I love being able to push one button in my car and say "find gas stations" or "find restaurants on route" and it will list all the things I ask for and with one word they will navigate me right to it. And also the speed limit thing is a huge help- a lot of times you can't find the posted speed limit and the GPS has it right on there for you.
 
I was about to say exactly this. My app gives me much more than a "simple line that leads to my destination". I get all of the above plus alternate routes in case of accidents, etc.
And there’s also the list of written (that give left and right!) instructions. I always go over those before I head out just to kind of prep myself.

I think that knowing how to use a paper map/atlas is EQUALLY as important as knowing how to used google maps, especially in an emergency. and atlas will never run out of wifi /data or power in a catastrophic event. We have cell phone and a landline. That land line has cordless phones and 2 corded phone attached to it. We had a snow storm a couple of years ago guess what worked? Only the corded phones, the old rotary dial and analogue push button ones. They had enough charge coming through the telephone wire to call out and receive calls to family that still had power. The cell phone were useless as the internet and cell towers were damaged and not fixed for a few days.
What kind of catastrophic event would I need an atlas for? Serious question. Even as a perpetually lost person I know how to head out of town.

I haven’t used a landline in ten years. In that time I’ve never needed it. A catastrophic event caused by weather in Las Vegas is highly unlikely. When you rely on cellphones you get in the habit of keeping them charged. (As I sit here both mine and my husband’s are plugged in.) I have an array of power banks always charged and ready to go plus three vehicles out front if any of that fails. But, it’s just not something I have to worry too much about.
 
And there’s also the list of written (that give left and right!) instructions. I always go over those before I head out just to kind of prep myself.


What kind of catastrophic event would I need an atlas for? Serious question. Even as a perpetually lost person I know how to head out of town.

I haven’t used a landline in ten years. In that time I’ve never needed it. A catastrophic event caused by weather in Las Vegas is highly unlikely. When you rely on cellphones you get in the habit of keeping them charged. (As I sit here both mine and my husband’s are plugged in.) I have an array of power banks always charged and ready to go plus three vehicles out front if any of that fails. But, it’s just not something I have to worry too much about.
The cell phones WERE fully charge. They had no SIGNAL due to to towers be knocked out. The buried phone lines still worked! In Las Vegas maybe not. A rain/wind or snow storm can make power and data difficult to access. All I was saying was don't be come TOO dependent on technology and forget how to use older methods. Ever driven in area where towers are few and far between? Now put some sort or storm, or natural disaster that interferes with or damages those. Driving without access to your data knowing how to use and having a map or atlas to guide you would be helpful. I can drive on many major highways and not get a signal especially mountain passes/ valleys.
 
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Not judging anyone personally, just for the sake of discussion in general, I'm kind of surprised that so many people feel their kids need a phone because they are in activities. I have to wonder if we have lost the need to slow down a little. If soccer practice is scheduled from 5:00-7:00, but it happened to end at 6:30, I wouldn't see it as a big deal if my kid had to wait for her ride for 30 minutes, she would not melt. She can hang out, read, or talk to her friends. If I got there at 7:00, and practice ran a little late, it wouldn't bother me in the least to just wait. I can understand that there are sometimes exceptions to end times, but I can't believe so many organized activities go on with people have no idea when they will be done. What did we do back in the 1980's? Somehow we made it work, and there was never a long line of 30 kids waiting to use a school phone after practice either. A few maybe, but really, not that many people needed to communicate with their parents immediately. Why do we need to today?

I remember being in carpools when I was younger that worked just fine before cell phones. When I was older, I remember just being independent, walking home or riding my bike home from games and things (that was a small town, of course. But in the city we live in now, both my kids have been exposed to and learned to use public transit in their early teens) Or maybe catching a ride with a friend, or stopping at a friend's house sometimes on the way back from school or an after school activity and then just using their landline to check in and let my mom know where I was. We did a lot more communicating beforehand too, so before school I would just tell my mom, I'm going to the library after band practice. And she'd say, OK, be home by 6 for dinner. I knew I'd be walking home, or maybe if my friend Jane arranged to go to the library too, I could catch a ride home with her mom if she was being picked up. No need for a cell phone. I wore a watch. We used landlines at school and at businesses, but only very rarely if we really needed to. I find it hard to believe this kind of thing would never work today. Are we even willing to think outside the box? Have we just become a society used to instant everything and fear our children would be unsafe without a phone or constant supervision? Sure it's probably way less convenient than instant communication but I wonder if the benefits of kids not having their faces constantly glued to their phones or getting everything instantly might outweigh some convenience.

Parenting dynamics and social expectations have changed since then, though. A lot of the ways we handled situations like that when I was a kid, including leaving a bunch of kids to wait for a parent unsupervised or letting a kid walk home/ride with a friend without prior approval from a parent, just aren't done now. And yes, part of that is because we as a culture are so much more fearful than we were a generation or two ago. I walked home from kindergarten too, but no school would just let a 5yo walk away now... Depending on the school, students around me have to reach 4th or 6th grade to be able to leave after school without a parent or other responsible adult (who must be known to the school and on the emergency card).

But as others have said, having kids with their faces constantly glued to the phone is a parenting issue, not a phone issue. You can own a phone and still have limits. I don't think any of us believe that having a TV in the living room means kids can watch whatever they want, 24-7, or that owning a video game console is unspoken permission for a kid to abandon all outside interests and do nothing but game. A phone is no different. It can be used without being overused.

The bold is simply not true. You can get an overview of your trip in any map app, plot your route, mark places you want to stop at, find places to eat, get gas etc. You can actually see landmarks as they are if you want. You also have the added bonus of speed limits, road construction warnings, accident warnings and a visual of what lane you need to be in. We’re not a bunch of blind sheep heading out and just hoping for the best, lol.

Google is *wonderful* for finding the random things along your route, IMO. I've found so many good little restaurants and parks and shops that way, both in advance and on the fly!
 
atlas will never run out of wifi /data or power in a catastrophic event.
But an Atlas can also be out of date and have incorrect information basically as soon as it's printed. If I'm going somewhere unfamiliar and I'm planning on using GPS, I call up Google maps on my computer and get a look at the general area (what interstates, how far off the interstates, etc). Then I use GPS in my vehicle.

I will say my reliance on GPS has decreased my sense of direction somewhat.
 
No, I disagree. If you want to use a cell phone as a navigator, fine. But using an Atlas or map isn't a "belief" that's being imposed on kids. Using an Atlas or a map is a skill, a skill that gives you an overview of the area in which you're traveling. Here's an example: Let's say you've never been to Disney World (okay, maybe that's a bad idea 'cause just about everyone knows it's in Florida -- make it Tweetsie Railroad; not everyone can name the town where it's located), but you agree to drive by yourself and meet your friends. If you just get into the car and punch information into your phone, you have no idea where you're going ... you don't know if you're headed into the mountains or across a lake ... you don't know whether you're going to pass 10 miles from a cool factory outlet mall ... you don't know anything except the simple line that leads you to your destination.

BOTH are valuable, and failing to teach your kids Atlases /maps because you consider them outdated is just as short-sighted as refusing to use GPS. In a perfect world, when you're about to embark on a trip, you'd check a map to see the overall area to which you're headed ... get a general idea of whether you'll be traveling on interstates or backroads ... and once you have that general idea in your mind, you'd punch your information in and use the GPS as a turn-by-turn.

It's kind of like some of my students who claim they can't read an analog clock. They're missing a basic life skill.

I can't churn butter by hand and my kids don't know how to program a VCR to record something, but we get by just fine. :D
 
No, I disagree. If you want to use a cell phone as a navigator, fine. But using an Atlas or map isn't a "belief" that's being imposed on kids. Using an Atlas or a map is a skill, a skill that gives you an overview of the area in which you're traveling. Here's an example: Let's say you've never been to Disney World (okay, maybe that's a bad idea 'cause just about everyone knows it's in Florida -- make it Tweetsie Railroad; not everyone can name the town where it's located), but you agree to drive by yourself and meet your friends. If you just get into the car and punch information into your phone, you have no idea where you're going ... you don't know if you're headed into the mountains or across a lake ... you don't know whether you're going to pass 10 miles from a cool factory outlet mall ... you don't know anything except the simple line that leads you to your destination.

.


Hmmmm----I would say you either lack a good digital navigational tool or lack the skills to use it then.
I'Ve never had a printed atlas which telly me where factory outlet malls are---but my navi in my car can easily do everyhting in your example:

zoom out to see the whole route and then you can see if the drive goes near a lake, or a small town, or whatever other landscape feature. Go into the system and ask and it will tell me what restraurants are along the route, or museums, or other tourist attractions. I can ask to be routed the fastest way, or the shortest, or the most fuel effecient, or the most scenic....

It is certainly good to be able to read a map (or analog watch) but that doesn't mean it is a better skill or somehow nobel to do that instead of using more modern tools now that those are available. I think the "belief" some have is that using the old fashioned tool is better/required or that the newer ones are lazy or entitled---and I disagree.
One place you see this a lot lately is about handwriting and feeling all kids must learn to write in cursive---somehow printing or inputting on a keyboard or swiping it in on a phone isn't as "good" for some reason, even though it commuinicates just as well. Meanwhile, very few of the "cursive or bust" people write caligraphy with pins dipped in ink wells . . .
 
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We bought our daughter an iPhone for her 7th birthday. She has limited time and it has parental controls applied. She and her 4 year old sister both have had iPads since 2. I see no problem with a phone at a young age.
 
Also, in my limited experience, the kids who got phones the latest(but wanted them sooner) are the ones MOST glued to them once they get them----being denied that basic tool when everyone else had it made it into some sort of coveted item in their minds, instead of just the tool that it is to all the kids who'Ve had it for however long.

Personally---other than one particular nicer phone that DS19 wanted a couple of years ago, we never gave phones as gifts or treated them as somehting particularly special with our kid (same kid also wanted a very specialized backpack a year earlier which eneded up as a gift, but notmral backpacks prior to that were just needed backpack for school). we treated phones as the tools they are, to be bought, cared for, used and replaced as needed. Thankfully that worked well for our family.
 

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