Having had two splendid Signature meals up to this point, I figured why not go for the Trifecta. So I had thrown away our 8pm O'hana reservation when an 8pm Narcoossees opened up. I figured fine dining plus fireworks, what a splendid way to spend the evening!
So we cleaned up and took a Lyft to the GF. We were highly impressed with the resort. Eventually we found our way out past the pool to the restaurant, and were ready to be impressed. Given our terrible lunch, it had a pretty low bar to clear. Eventually we were shown to our seats, and I mistakenly thought, wow, what a great view for the fireworks later!
This should be perfect! Or so I thought...
They start you out with a complimentary sourdough bread. Now, the only thing that is almost as popular out here in the PNW as coffee is sourdough bread. It even beats out flannel, depressing music, weed, and people that don't believe in using deodorants. Yes, it's THAT popular.
This was terrible. It was stale, and dried out. The only aspect of it that was unique was it's ability to leave crumbs all over the table. The butter was also rather bland and it did not improve the bread. Well, we weren't here for the complimentary bread anyway, but I was already getting a bad feeling about the restaurant. Maybe it was just indigestion from lunch?
I decided after debating between another mule and a beer to try a beer I had never had before. I was a little stunned when she just plopped a can of beer and a glass in front of me with a bit of a pffft noise. Apparently my beer choice was met with disdain.
After I had poured and staged it.
I really don't care for IPA's, but this was alright. Had a lot of citrus hints to it.
Given how much we loved the Calamari at Shades of Green, we decided to order that as an App here. Crispy Rhode Island Calamari Peppadew-Banana Pepper-Olive Relish and Tomato Coulis.
So. Much. Breading.
It was the wrong kind of breading too. It tasted like a chicken tender breading. You could only taste peppers and breading. We wound up not eating a lot of this. My apprehension was rising. We opted to set this to the side as we didn't want to fill up on disappointing chicken tender errr calamari. I should also note the table was more or less covered in bread crumbs, and while other tables got theirs cleaned off, ours was ignored.
For my Main I ordered Wild Key West Shrimp and Campanella pasta: savoy spinach, oven-roasted tomatoes, basil pistou, comte cheese, and chardonnay-garlic cream.
I need to add, I do not have the before picture on this, as it did not come out. What I am posting is what I did not finish. This is how much food was left, SWIMMING in soup. It was sour, it was soaked, it was soggy, it was terrible. There were only three shrimp in this dish too, which I ate, and after a couple of bites of pasta, I was already not feeling well.
Is that supposed to be a soup?
It was, frankly, a bad joke. As soon as it came my DW asked me if the pasta was al dente, because she thought it looked horrid. No, it was nowhere close to al dente. It was beyond mushy. Worst thing I put in my mouth the entire trip.
My DW ordered Scottish Salmon: Succotash of Summer Corn and Hominy, Creamy Corn Purée, Piccalilli Relish, and Andouille Sausage.
Looks like it has a nice char right?
Except that wasn't a char at all. Despite there being no mention of it being spicey, that fish was covered in a spicy salt with paprika and other seasonings. My DW mouth was on fire. It was also cold. WTH with the cold food today? Worse, all of the accompaniments tasted...raw. The hominy was cold and hard, as if it had been dumped out of a can right onto the plate. I tried this as well and it did not taste as if it had been cooked.
This is what was going back to the kitchen. At a signature restaurant. You can also see the uneaten calamari.
My DD ordered the Oven-roasted Wild Shrimp with potato puffs.
First, that IS NOT a potato puff. It is a tater tot. A cold, soaked in oil, disgusting tater tot (I happen to like tot's, these were just baaaaad). Also, a couple of those shrimp had not even be de-veined. Sure looks like an $18 dish to me. She wouldn't touch the tater tots, I had one myself and could not believe that is what they were serving. Yuck.
She wouldn't finish her plate either.
They took the relatively full plates without comment. Given our conversation had been about just how bad our food was, the table behind us started making fun of us to the waitress about how we must just be trying to get a free meal, and how they have never had a bad meal here. It was bad enough they were making the comments, but the waitress just laughed it up with them. I was rather incensed at that point. Despite the lousy culinary day though, I was still trying to enjoy myself.
Ok, lets enjoy those fireworks!
You have got to be kidding me!
Yes, as you approached the time for fireworks, people just start lining up outside the restaurant, so instead of getting to see them with your meal, you get to see peoples backside.
I was a bit beside myself at this point. The waitress who had been avoiding our table popped back by eventually and asked me if I wanted anything else. I informed her I didn't want anything else from their kitchen that night, but would like to speak to someone about our experience. At that point, My DW said she was still hungry and asked for a dessert menu. When she came back with the menu, she finally cleared the bread crumbs off from the start of the meal, and my DW ordered the Narcoossee's Candy Bar Dark chocolate-mocha bar with house-made guanaja chocolate gelato. My DD ordered the chocolate brownie. Both desserts were ok. I was past the picture taking point at that point of the evening.
The waitress went back to the table behind us and they continued to make snide comments.
A solid 20 minutes after my DW and DD had finished, she brought the check and said the manager was still busy. I found what amounted to nearly exact change, left that in the bill, and we left.
I did complain to Disney about this. No I did not want anything. We were not angling for anything except an enjoyable meal which we did not get. The entire day had been a bust, and the meals had been awful. What a huge disappointment Narcoossees turned out to be.
In looking back, I don't understand why nobody ever bothered to check on our satisfaction with the meal the entire time. It should be a given that if full plates are coming back to the kitchen, you at least enquire about it, especially at a signature restaurant. Also, I should have demanded to speak with a manager earlier. I did feel a bit shamed by the comments from the nearby table is the only reason that I did not escalate it earlier.
At a certain point though, this evening was probably beyond saving. They made it abundantly clear they did not care about our experience, and at best we received dismissive service.
I hope this does not come off as an over reaction. I waited to write this up, because I did not want emotion to factor in.
So for food, service and atmosphere, I give our signature dinner at Narcoossees a (1/10). 1 point for the desserts. Which I am told were ok.
This was BY FAR, the worst meal of the trip.
It was one of the worst meals I have ever had the misfortune of having out. I can't say enough negative things about his experience, so I will end it there.
Up next, Lunch at Sanaa!
