To tell DD about the trip or not

[mastermind307]

So my plan is to surprise DD with our mother daughter trip for May/June 2018 at Christmas. I think she may know something is going on, but nothing for sure. That was until today. Today my parents came to visit. My mom knows that I'm planning to surprise DD. So we're sitting around, my mom, my DD, and myself and we're talking about vacations and I mention that we don't have anything planned for next year. Then my mom says yeah you do, you have Disney. I tried to play it off as no, we thought about going, but are waiting until 2019. But DD (who is 11) is smart and I'm pretty sure she caught on. So now I'm trying to decide whether or not to tell her now or wait until Christmas.

Should I go ahead and tell her now that way she can help plan or go ahead with my original plan and hope that maybe she forgets (she doesn't forget things easily)before Christmas?

 

[Party.Of.4-NY>>>FL]

I vote to keep the secret until Christmas. If she does suspect something is up, let her keep wondering.

 

[JessicaW1234]

I also think you should wait & still have it be your Christmas surprise.

 

[srwarden1928]

I think you should let her in on the fun of planning. The surprise isn't anymore.

 

[LilyWDW]

Tell her and let her enjoy the planning and having that time with you. She may really enjoy having a say in the plans and being able to sit down with you to come up with them.

 

[Wild4Walt]

Sounds like she'll be thrilled either way - do you think she'd have an interest in helping plan? If you do, I'd tell her now and it can start a nice tradition of you guys planning the trips together.

 

[mastermind307]

I'm thinking about telling her, only because I'm actually thinking about canceling the trip. I don't think she cares about going to Disney very much. She's been 4 times since 2010. My DH was talking to her trying to get a feel for if she would even want to go to Disney. When he asked her where she wants to go for vacation next year, she just wants to go to Breyerfest in Lexington KY, she loves anything and everything to do with horses. We live near Indianapolis, so we can easily drive down to KY for that. I figure if I tell her and she's not interested, I can cancel it and we can go do something else. As much as I want to go to Disney, it won't be much fun if she doesn't want to go. And if she does want to go, then great, she can help me plan.

 

[mastermind307]

I went ahead and told her. She is excited about it and wants to go! I do wish I would have waited, she said she hadn't figured it out, but I'm not sure I believe her. So at least she can help with the planning now.

 

[Blackadder337]

I hesitated about whether or not to tell my DD about it last year, but ultimately since it was her first time, we figured we'd wait until closer to the time to let her know. That way its a delayed surprise, but also as you said, she got to have some input as to the planning.

All in all she was thrilled to go and we had a great time. I'm not sure she remembers the "before the trip" part

 

[sk!mom]

If you aren't going until May/June, then giving it as a Christmas gift is fine. I'm not a fan of surprising but 5/6 months before isn't really a surprise to me. That's plenty of time for her to plan, anticipate, etc...

 

[kcp1377]

I'm glad she was excited and now you don't have to cancel! We always tell our kids because they seem to love the planning and we've been there enough that the one time we tried to surprise them their reaction wasn't quite what I had envisioned. (They were still thrilled, but not jumping up and down excited!) The kids also love to start saving extra money and doing extra chores so they can buy their own GC. You'll have a great time!

 

[kboo]

I'm thinking about telling her, only because I'm actually thinking about canceling the trip. I don't think she cares about going to Disney very much. She's been 4 times since 2010. My DH was talking to her trying to get a feel for if she would even want to go to Disney. When he asked her where she wants to go for vacation next year, she just wants to go to Breyerfest in Lexington KY, she loves anything and everything to do with horses. We live near Indianapolis, so we can easily drive down to KY for that. I figure if I tell her and she's not interested, I can cancel it and we can go do something else. As much as I want to go to Disney, it won't be much fun if she doesn't want to go. And if she does want to go, then great, she can help me plan.

I went ahead and told her. She is excited about it and wants to go! I do wish I would have waited, she said she hadn't figured it out, but I'm not sure I believe her. So at least she can help with the planning now.

I'm glad you didn't cancel the trip! My ODD is only 6, but for her, the anticipation and talking about the trip before we go is almost as much fun as actually going. She gets to pick a few restaurants and FPs, and it is definitely a fun bonding thing for us to talk about together. Obviously she is at an age where Disney is magical to her, but I can see that she may grow out of it by the time she's a tween, so any time she'd be excited to go (especially as she gets older), I'd savor that one more trip where she's excited about it. Have a great time!!