Wendy's "I'm Going to SCOTLAND!!!!" Weight Loss Journey(Scotland Trip Report Pg 10)

[M&N]

Am I feeling sorry for myself? Maybe a little. I just know that if someone in my family was having this surgery, I'd move heaven and earth to be there for them. I'd open my home to them for recovery (more practical than having to leave my kids--I'm a single mom afer all!) I'd do whatever it took. Am I not worth the same?

You are allowed to feel sorry for yourself. But that won't do anything but bring you down. Remember your positive thinking. You are bigger than your sister---in courage, attitude, accomoplishments, kindness, consideration of others, putting others first---need I go on? Your loving and caring nature is way bigger than hers. You need to feel sorry for her. She's missing out on her wonderful family. And yeah, jealousy could be rearing it's ugly head but that's her loss. God gives us what we need to get through but not until we need it. You have come through so much. Looking back, would you have thought you would be where you are now? Would you have believed you would have beat all the problems you had along the way? Look back and Praise Him...I know you do.
The above message was not intended to scold but to remind you what a wonderful person you are! As you said yourself, you don't realize how many people look up to you for inspiration. You know I am on that list.

 

[whgrn]

Thanks Donac and M&N. Your support means so much to me.

 

[BKMETV]

I've spent most of my life wavering between hating and being best friends with my sister...she has always been a "princess" and at times it is very trying. Wish you lived a little closer so we could help you out. I'd send a casserole but I don't think customs will let it through.

Take care

 

[whgrn]

I've spent most of my life wavering between hating and being best friends with my sister...she has always been a "princess" and at times it is very trying. Wish you lived a little closer so we could help you out. I'd send a casserole but I don't think customs will let it through.

Take care

Hmmm, what kind are we talking about? LOL.

Thanks

 

[tinkerbell of winter]

Wendy, you are such an inspiration to me, it makes me feel like it is possible for me to lose the weight also! I hope everything is getting better for you, I know what it's like to be frustrated with a situation.

 

[whgrn]

I'm finally starting to feel like myself again. The fog seems to be lifting, albeit slowly. The pain in my mouth is 95% gone. I still can't open my mouth very far, but I'm hoping warm compresses will help.

Yesterday I had planned to go to the pool, but my appointment at the Oral Surgeon ran long, and it was just too easy to turn around and go home. I didn't waste the morning though--went to the grocery store and did my major shopping for all the pre-surgery cooking. Glad I don't have a grocery bill like that every week!

From there I went to my Bible Study. It always makes me feel better. The girls in my group are awesome, and they just seem to say and do exactly what I need to cheer up. After that, I went and met an old friend for lunch. It was wonderful to see her again and catch up. So many parallels in our lives---it's nice to talk to someone who really "gets it".

Last night, I had some girls from church over for a game night. We played Scattergories and Boggle. We had a blast! Again, so nice to have that fellowship and fun with people who understand me.

Anyway, I think it was all just what the doctor ordered. Today I got up early, went to the gym to meet with my trainer and climb on the elliptical. Wow, I got out of shape FAST!! Had to tone down both the elliptical and the treadmill, and also use a lighter weight for a couple of exercises. YIKES! And only 5 days til surgery to get it together!

Came home from the gym and started cooking. And cooking. And cooking. 5 hours of non-stop chopping, mixing, browning, stirring. When I finally sat down I thought I would never get up again! But I put 20 servings of spinach lasagna, 14 servings of Spaghetti Pie, and 20 servings of veggie and meat sauce into my freezer! Tomorrow I will make 4 Chicken Pot Pies. Along with all the chili, soup, and other foods that are already in the freezer, I think we have enough for nearly 2 months of meals! I don't think we have to worry about going hungry while I'm recovering!

Tomorrow is Sunday, my favorite day of the week. And SUPPOSEDLY my dear sister and her family will grace us with their presence for dinner. (I'll believe it when I see it...) AND today my dad called and asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital Thursday for surgery! Wow, where did THAT come from?? (No doubt from Mom, who is the one I ranted to about the whole subject) I told him my BFF is taking me, and so he asked about coming up to visit. He probably can't come up on the weekend (gotta go to wrestling...), but he thinks he can come up on Friday. So that would be nice. And the girls from church are looking into taking a field trip up to visit over the weekend, which would be awesome. So maybe I won't be totally alone up there.

Best news of all is that I called the rehab center and they DO take HSS patients. AND they have reserved a bed for me! I didn't know they could or would do that, but the nice lady offered and I said SURE!! So they are expecting me the Monday after surgery, and at least that's one issue I dont' have to worry about.

Yup, things are definitely looking up. The smile is back on my face. Now, if I could just get my food back on track, I'd be cooking with gas!!

 

[donac]

I'm glad that you were able to schedule a room at the rehab near your house. That will make it so much easier for you to have visitors. Congrats on all that cooking. It was a lot of work today but it will be so worth it when you get home and don't feel like cooking.

Good luck Tuesday I will be thinking of you.

 

[BKMETV]

Glad things are looking up.

 

[racetrack18kb]

I can't believe you cooked all that!! What is spaghetti pie? I'm always looking for something new to make for us. Share the recipe if you have time.

I read your other post about your sister. I'm sorry she did this. I know how happy you are everytime she comes to visit. She may be jealous of all you have done but please remember that all your friends here are in awe of you. You've been a wonderful friend to me with all the problems we've had with DS. I'll be praying for a swift recovery for you.

 

[M&N]

Keep the smile there...

 

[racetrack18kb]

Looks better!

 

[Pikester]

 

[whgrn]

Enough already! I haven't felt right since January 2nd! We're talking over 5 weeks of this garbage.

First it was the tooth abcess. Then the bronchitis. Now I'm not sure what it is. I'm exhausted. Any movement at all makes me dizzy and lightheaded. I get short of breath walking across the room. My heart races like mad sometimes--yesterday I clocked it at 135!!! (Heck, I don't get that high during most workouts) in between, I've had some serious nausea, and a couple episodes of barfing. I have had it with this feeling crummy.

I haven't been to the gym in weeks. I'd give anything to be able to hop on the elliptical right now, but I wouldn't last 2 minutes. I nearly passed out in church today, and when I made it outside to the fresh air, my breakfast came back up. I came home afterwards and slept for an hour and a half. My "lunch" was a little bit of juice and some goldfish crackers--all I could handle at that point.

I have to go to NYC Wednesday for my 2nd try at pre-admission testing. I'm not even sure they'll clear me for surgery, which is now scheduled for February 18. Am I ready? Could I handle the surgery right now? I honestly don't know. I saw my doctor on Thursday and she ordered some lab work, so we'll see how that comes back. With my luck, I'll find out I'm more anemic than usual, and they'll refuse to do the surgery regardless of how I feel.

Despite the lack of exercise, and the fact that my food is a mess, I've continued to lose weight. Probably becuase I'm losing muscle, which is NOT a good thing. I feel like I've lost all the progress I had made in the past year as far as stamina and strength. I'll probably have to start over from scratch when I finally do get back to the gym.

The other day I tried to eat my normal breakfast, the one I eat every single day most of the time. I couldn't finish it. I can eat only a little at a time, and the food that goes down easiest is not the food that's best for me. I've graduated from pudding and ice cream to PB&J and York Peppermint Patties.

So, how do I get my mojo back? How do I climb back on the wagon, when I feel so crummy? And who do I see about getting a "do-over" for 2009 so far?

 

[donac]

Wendy, I was thinking of you yesterday and wondering how the surgery went. I can't believe that you have been so sick that they couldn't do the surgery. I hope the blood work shows something that can be fixed. Don't go back to the Peppermint Patties. YOu have come so far don't give up. Hope you feel better soon.

 

[whgrn]

Well, the good news is that even with the Peppermint Patties, I'm down .6 for the week. Only 1 pound to go! AND I lost 2 inches in my waist, as well as some inches other places too. Weird, but i'll take it.

I slept through breakfast today, and made a "normal" lunch. Again, I couldn't finish it, so I put it in the fridge to eat for a snack later.

I feel "OK" right now. Still a little short of breath, but not dizzy (yet). I have to do some grocery shopping, so we'll see how that goes...

 

[whgrn]

Well, it's done. My knee replacement was a great success! All my hard work leading up to it paid off big time.

After the 3 week delay from bronchitis, I had surgery on Wednesday, February 18. I had sedation and an epidural, rather than general anesthesia. What a difference that makes! I need not have worried about the epidural, it was no problem, and it worked like a charm! I had absolutely no pain, becuase I couldn't feel my legs at all! the day after surgery they wanted to stand me up, but I couldn't feel my feet, so I just dangled at the bedside. The second night, I woke up in pain, and pushing the button for more medicine in the epidural did nothing. turned out the epidural had fallen out! Fortunately, some Percocet and a shot of Dilaudid took care of the pain and I was fine.

By the time I left the hospital on Saturday, I had more flexion in my knee than before surgery! I could also walk short distances with a walker. I had a great roommate at the hospital, which made it nice. And the hospital was awesome! Top notch in every way!

I arrived at rehab Saturday afternoon. My new roommate was 85 years old, but I'd never have guessed it. I thought mid-60s. She was a hoot! We had a great time together and I really enjoyed her. I started PT on Monday and worked my tail off. and what was impossible Monday was difficult Tuesday and almost easy Wednesday! They kicked me out on Thursday becuase I was doing so well--2 days early!

I am home now and walking with a cane. Pain is minimal. I am taking Percocet twice a day, before I do my exercises. I sleep very well back in my own bed! The nurse from the VNA came today to set up service. I'll have a home health aide 3 times a week to help with a shower (after the staplses come out). I'll have PT at home 3 times a week. The nurse will come draw blood twice a week while I'm on Coumadin (1 month). And the staples will come out Tuesday. i had planned to go to the doctor tomorrow to have them out, but since we are expecting 6-9 inches of snow, I won't be going anywhere!

They weighed me when I got to rehab and I freaked out to see 197 on the scale! Then I realized I am SO full of fluid! My legs are quite puffy. They have gone down alot since then, and I am down 10 pounds or so, but I still have a way to go. My appetite is quite decreased, which helps. Hopefully I will soon be back on program in all ways. In the meantime, I am SOOOO grateful for every pound I lost, for every leg exercise I did in preparation for surgery, and for the wonderful surgeon I had. These things combined to make this a great success. I will do the right knee in the fall, and my Mom will do hers at the same time so we can be roommates at the hospital and rehab! I will be working hard to get my leg strong before surgery (not too far to go now!), and if all goes well, I will be riding a bicycle next spring!!

 

[donac]

Congrats on your hard work paying off. It is something I will keep in the back of my mind as I get ready to have my foot operated on..

Glad to hear you are feeling better.

Looks like 8 - 12 inches here by the coast. With our luck it will be nothing.

Have a great week and keep up the hard work.