What has been the worst family/friends get together you have been at?

[aprilgail]

The worst I guess would have to be a family wedding we drove 6 hours to go to- it was in a church in Virginia and the reception was in the basement of the church and 90+ degrees- "reception" was nothing more than this gross slimy punch looking stuff and cake and mints- we drove 6 hours, were all very hungry and ended up having to leave to go out to eat. Never in our lives have we been to a reception that didn't serve a full meal, even if sit down at least a buffet! Family all still refer to it as the wedding in the hellhole. It was so hot it was unbearable down there.

 

[momz]

I can think of a couple of events. Both involving a nephew.

Christmas gathering, nephew was about eighth of ninth grade. He arrived late by being dropped off by a friend. He was high on what we assumed to be weed. His parents laid into him hard about being out and not coming home the night before. Nephew started yelling, his parents started yelling. They were escalating. My parents got involved. Lots of yelling about who did wrong, to the point of criticizing parenting or lack thereof. I and another family member were sitting at the dining room table. We couldn't get out without having to move through the participanrs. So we sat there. Finally, they all left, and so did we as soon as we could.

A couple years after that, we all took a long weekend trip together. The same nephew had moved on from weed to who knows what. We went to a zoo, baseball game, etc. Nephew spent the entire time complaining that he had to be there. Just like before, the arguments escalated and eventually my parents got involved...again. Nephew cursed at my mother and punched my father.

 

[Summer2018]

There have been so many since alcoholism runs in my family and drama does as well. One that really sticks out in my mind was the Christmas before my sister got divorced. My BIL was always mean to my sister, but that Christmas he was brutal and didn’t try to hide his disdain toward her. He said cruel things to her right in front of his and our family.

As we drove home from that debacle of a Christmas, we planned our Christmas vacation to WDW the following year.

 

[Jdbsfw]

Jackson Pollock could have composed a better, more detailed story on a hanging bedsheet.....

 

[OhMari]

For the past 18 years we had to witness my sister in law and her daughter trying to get attention from her husband, and my nieces dad. Both always sat on his lap. The last 5 years the daughter is winning. It is so uncomfortable to witness, we are all like WTH is going on. My niece graduates h.s. in May and we still are waiting for a graduation announcement. My niece and sister-in-law are coming to my sons wedding, but not him. We all are sighing with relief.

 

[2goofycampers]

Our neighbors invited us over for Christmas Eve dinner. I guess they though everyone would be on their best behavior with strangers at the table. Wow, were they wrong.

But, it did make us more appreciative of our Christmas dinner with family the next day.

 

[Pooh2]

I have two big family parties next weekend. Think I will stop reading this thread until Monday!

 

[cabanafrau]

Probably the birth of my children. We TOLD everyone not to come to the hospital. We said we would let them know as soon as they were born and when to visit. Well DH and I get to the hospital, I'm through pre-op and as I'm being wheeled across the hall to the OR there was a CROWD of people there. My bio-mom and her family were wasted (one of the final things that led to the final break from her), my step-mother and her family were irritated with them, DH's family was like, "WTH is wrong with her family?!" It was a mess.

The nursery had a big window and they could see the babies while I was being closed up. So they were all watching them attend to my son and got all freaked out before we'd even heard from the doctors. I got really angry that more people had seen my son in the NICU than I had, my drunk family was angry we wouldn't let them hold my daughter... It was a crap show.

AND my aunt wouldn't talk to me for like month because DH yelled at them all to leave and she took it very personally.

Fun times.

Is this not exactly as you'd specified in your birth plan?

 

[cabanafrau]

A friend organized a surprise birthday party for his wife. She is a very controlling person and refused to come in the moment she knew what was happening.

 

[Turksmom]

Our own wedding day. Yet the worse the wedding day, the longer the marriage they say. Going on 18 years strong.

Mine too! And we'll celebrate 20 years in July. But if anyone asks about the wedding- I still don't want to talk about it!

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Is this not exactly as you'd specified in your birth plan?

Not quite. I forgot to include the inebriated family members LOL.

 

[dosekies]

My brother's wedding. I brought my now fiancé, we were just friends at the time. My brother and his friends got super drunk and were being really mean to my fiancé the whole time. Eventually the two of us just left early in the night and went back to the hotel. I hate that I missed so much of the party and it actually took a few years for him and my brother to be on civil terms after that. Now they're like best friends when they see each other.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Minor overall but has had lasting effects.

Several years ago we had a tradition of sorts to get together for Taco Tuesday (we didn't go get tacos all the time though) with the in-laws. However, the one time my husband and I invited my mom ended with my mother-in-law giving my mom the cold shoulder. Mother-in-law is very territorial about time spent with her and instead of it being a great time with two sides of the family together it was an awkward situation where I felt terrible for my mom as she was made to not feel welcome--it wasn't like mother-in-law hadn't had a ton of times with just us you'd think she would have been grown up about it and would be welcoming. Since then we have yet to have lunch or dinner or breakfast all together. I'd like to but it's not in the cards.

There was the other incident where my mom invited my husband and I to go watch fireworks for 4th of July but invited the in-laws too (this was before the Taco Tuesday incident). It also ended in a disaster where we haven't done that since. Funny thing is it's not that I don't think they don't like each other it's just that mother-in-law can't take that step back and embrace others joining in on the time. She's like that with her ex-husband too so it's not an issue really with my mom.

 

[tvguy]

Party at a friend's condo. Friend got upset at a neighbor's music playing too loud half away across the complex. Too much alcohol. Words were exchanged, escalated to fistfight. Other guy went into his house to get a gun. One of our party goers followed him into his condo and explained to him why getting a gun was a bad idea. The complex was a mix of owner occupants and renters. This guy was a renter who had a number of issues with other residents. While this incident was probably no more than half his fault, he got a "Three-Day Unconditional Quit Notice" because it was the final straw for the other residents.

 

[dollarmite]

DH and I travelled an hour to some friends' engagement party that started at 5.30pm, so right over meal time. Engagement parties are generally a big deal here - presents, lots of food (usually a big buffet or a sit down meal) etc. All I can say is, a few bowls of potato chips, and a couple of trays of finger food does not go far between approximately 80 people. DH and I stopped at a buffet restaurant on the way home as we were starving. I usually enjoy engagements parties, but this one was pretty boring party overall.

A year later DH and I attended the wedding of the same couple in a fancy golf club. Due to the way the seating was set up, our table didn't get to partake in the buffet as well as the other tables did. Our entire table and the one next to us all ended up leaving early as we were starving and needed to get some food. I was about eight weeks pregnant and about to faint from lack of food. The inefficient staff (who I think was at least 50% to blame for this debacle) couldn't have cared less. Thank goodness there was a McDonalds a few minutes drive away.

 

[jdb in AZ]

Probably the birth of my children. We TOLD everyone not to come to the hospital. We said we would let them know as soon as they were born and when to visit. Well DH and I get to the hospital, I'm through pre-op and as I'm being wheeled across the hall to the OR there was a CROWD of people there. My bio-mom and her family were wasted (one of the final things that led to the final break from her), my step-mother and her family were irritated with them, DH's family was like, "WTH is wrong with her family?!" It was a mess.

The nursery had a big window and they could see the babies while I was being closed up. So they were all watching them attend to my son and got all freaked out before we'd even heard from the doctors. I got really angry that more people had seen my son in the NICU than I had, my drunk family was angry we wouldn't let them hold my daughter... It was a crap show.

AND my aunt wouldn't talk to me for like month because DH yelled at them all to leave and she took it very personally.

Fun times.

If/when you have more kids, i hope you don't announce when you're going to the hospital. Our DGD avoided a bad situation by not telling a certain obnoxious relative which hospital the birth would be in.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

If/when you have more kids, i hope you don't announce when you're going to the hospital. Our DGD avoided a bad situation by not telling a certain obnoxious relative which hospital the birth would be in.

You know, I did consider not telling anyone but I also thought they'd respect our wishes.

But, no more kids for me so... If I do happen to have another child I will follow your advice!

 

[pigletto]

Probably the birth of my children. We TOLD everyone not to come to the hospital. We said we would let them know as soon as they were born and when to visit. Well DH and I get to the hospital, I'm through pre-op and as I'm being wheeled across the hall to the OR there was a CROWD of people there. My bio-mom and her family were wasted (one of the final things that led to the final break from her), my step-mother and her family were irritated with them, DH's family was like, "WTH is wrong with her family?!" It was a mess.

The nursery had a big window and they could see the babies while I was being closed up. So they were all watching them attend to my son and got all freaked out before we'd even heard from the doctors. I got really angry that more people had seen my son in the NICU than I had, my drunk family was angry we wouldn't let them hold my daughter... It was a crap show.

AND my aunt wouldn't talk to me for like month because DH yelled at them all to leave and she took it very personally.

Fun times.

You win. I would have lost my marbles.

I can’t think of anything offhand that stands out as the “WORST”. I’ve been to events that weren’t fun, and sometimes I don’t want to see some people, but thankfully nothing overly awful or dramatic has happened.

 

[MickeyMinnieMom]

Probably a bad sign that I gave up on identifying a “worst” experience from the long list that came to mind, right...?

 

[leebee]

New Year's Eve, maybe 28 years ago. SIL-C and SIL-K and their boyfriends wanted to go out for NYE, so DH, MIL, BIL, and myself were babysitting for their 5 kids (one SIL had 3 kids, one had 2 kids). During the evening we discovered that one of the boyfriends had been regularly beating my SILs kids with a 1"x2" board, and the SIL knew. Eventually the SILs and their boyfriends came home. Everyone was drunk and it was obvious that there had been disagreements (alcohol and jealous boyfriends are NEVER a good mix). Anyhow, the boyfriend who was beating the kids came in and my MIL started giving him (and my SIL) a piece of her mind about how they were treating the kids. Boyfriend started smacking my MIL around, my BIL tried to stop it... on and on. DH and I got all the kids out of the house and locked them in my minivan while we waited for the cops to arrive. Yup... fun times.