Women should be MOTHERS NOT CEO's Graduation Speech

[Claudia1]

I waited to post until I got first-hand info. I know this teacher and the class/school choose him for a reason: he is a beloved teacher with strong morals and they know his beliefs. My 3rd cousin was in the graduating class and several of my relatives were in the audience. I regret not being able to be there in person.

I asked my cousin for her first-hand summary and here it is. Yes, he has a "Christian" message but, no, he is not anti-female. He spoke to the guys, too. He is against anything that destroys families and people. In that graduating class, many will not have a "career" (due to demographics) but will work minimum-wage jobs or be a SAHM. He was lifting up those who will not be highly educated and giving every student a moral goal.

"Hi, Claudia! This is ridiculous. The gist of his message is that the rebels of the 60s changed the world by encouraging free love and unproductive lives and that has now become the norm...that people like Sheryl Crowe who sings, "If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad" and Lady Gaga who says, "I was born this way" promote ridiculous messages. His example was that his kids were born to poop in the tub, but at some point, you have to grow up. They aren't saying that he also stressedt that the world doesn't need more millionaire male entrepreneurs...it needs fathers who put family first. His speech was to encourage them to be "rebels" and do the right thing, not get wrapped up in the ways of the world and do whatever makes YOU happy with no regard for others. He even mentioned "the carpenter who changed the world." I'm surprised that wasn't the point of controversy they fixated on since he dared to bring religion into a school setting. It was an awesome message, and the first person to stand up and clap was a female Senior. He received a several minute standing ovation from the whole audience. "

OK, you can agree or disagree with his "Christian" message but the whole slant was personal responsibility for your actions and the family you create. I personally believe that is missing in our society today and needs to be re-introduced at many levels.

Flame suit is ON.

 

[MrsDuck]

OK, you can agree or disagree with his "Christian" message but the whole slant was personal responsibility for your actions and the family you create. I personally believe that is missing in our society today and needs to be re-introduced at many levels.

Flame suit is ON.

Hey girl, take your flame suit off! Well, you'll be getting no flames from me, at least.

Personal responsibility IS what is boils down to which needs to come from BOTH parents (see my previous post), if they're involved. I realize single parents have a different situation.

The Christian message in a school would bother me, if it was a secular school but at the end of the day, I see what he is saying.

 

[K and K's Mommy]

When I was in college, I had a professor in my "Intro to Education" class tell me that a woman can be a better teacher if she didn't have kids of her own.

Just recently, I was watching one of those news magazine shows like "Dateline" or "20/20", & the story was about a female CEO of some famous company who had stepped down from her position.

The CEO said that she couldn't have achieved what she had if she had had a family. She went on to say that she made a conscious decision to not have a family in pursuit of her career. And she further claimed that a woman, as much as we might like to believe differently, cannot, in actuality, "have it all" - that it's just not possible for a woman to be a good wife & mother & be a successful CEO. Yes, there's a double standard for men & women, &, if one wants to "play" in a man's world & win the game, the only way to do it is w/o the responsibility & emotional ties to a family (husband & kids).

She regrets the decision she made.

She's now married, & she & her husband are looking to adopt a child.

I'm not sure whether or not I agree w/ her, but the interview & her viewpoints were interesting.

Back to my college professor...

I have never forgotten what the professor said - that the best teachers are childless.

For 2 of the years I was a teacher, I had children, & I was not a very good mother during those 2 years. I was a good teacher, but I was not a good mother. I'm not saying that every teacher who has kids of her own is not a good mother, I just know that I wasn't. Some women can do it. I couldn't.

Interesting... I agree and disagree. I stopped teaching when my second was born. It was a hard decision because I loved my job, but I knew that I could not put in the hours to teaching that I always had with two kids. I wanted to be the best teacher and the best parent and knew I couldn't do both. I think some people can, but I don't like being scheduled to the max and overly stressed.

11 years later (and one more child) I don't regret my decision, but I do believe that if I went back I would be a better teacher. I've seen education from the parent side and believe that is invaluable experience. I'm taking classes this summer so I can go back if I want. I miss teaching, but I still think I made the right decision for when they were little.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

What one CEO says, doesn't represent reality.

This wasn't a CEO, it was a high school social studies teacher.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

Yes, he has a "Christian" message but, no, he is not anti-female.

I'm not sure I understand what you are saying here. It seems you are indicating that a Christian message would by default be anti-female.

 

[KimR]

Not all women are cut out to be SAHMs and these children are often better off in daycare. My mother stayed home with us because that's what she thought she should be doing, but I have no doubt all our lives would have been better had she had a job. She was so unhappy and turned to alcohol to relieve her boredom, taking her frustrations out on my sister and me. It was horrible. My sister is in her 40s and is still suffering the fallout from our upbringing.

 

[JRawkSteady]

Wow...there are a lot of people here who are either implying or straight out saying that your happiness and dreams go out the window when you have children. That either the man or the woman has to give up their life is preposterous!

One example: My mother was a single mother and raised me damn well with a full time job! Sure, there were a few days I had to stay at my grandma's, but there was zero resentment for that. I LOVE my grandma! And my mom got to do what she loved!

Second example: I am a musician and my DGF is an actress. When we have kids, it's going to be tough! And we will have to sacrifice a small chunk of time to make sure SOMEONE is home to take care of the kids. But neither of us will ever give up the careers we love! There IS a way to have it all! I've seen it done. I've lived it! We were not put on this earth to have miserable lives! Love your children! Love your job! Love your life!

That all said...the guy giving the speech was a jerk. How can you be supplying children with knowledge when you are also telling them not to work? Men can stay at home too. I have MANY stay-at-home dad friends! Welcome to 2013, sir!

 

[moon]

I waited to post until I got first-hand info. I know this teacher and the class/school choose him for a reason: he is a beloved teacher with strong morals and they know his beliefs. My 3rd cousin was in the graduating class and several of my relatives were in the audience. I regret not being able to be there in person.

I asked my cousin for her first-hand summary and here it is. Yes, he has a "Christian" message but, no, he is not anti-female. He spoke to the guys, too. He is against anything that destroys families and people. In that graduating class, many will not have a "career" (due to demographics) but will work minimum-wage jobs or be a SAHM. He was lifting up those who will not be highly educated and giving every student a moral goal.

"Hi, Claudia! This is ridiculous. The gist of his message is that the rebels of the 60s changed the world by encouraging free love and unproductive lives and that has now become the norm...that people like Sheryl Crowe who sings, "If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad" and Lady Gaga who says, "I was born this way" promote ridiculous messages. His example was that his kids were born to poop in the tub, but at some point, you have to grow up. They aren't saying that he also stressedt that the world doesn't need more millionaire male entrepreneurs...it needs fathers who put family first. His speech was to encourage them to be "rebels" and do the right thing, not get wrapped up in the ways of the world and do whatever makes YOU happy with no regard for others. He even mentioned "the carpenter who changed the world." I'm surprised that wasn't the point of controversy they fixated on since he dared to bring religion into a school setting. It was an awesome message, and the first person to stand up and clap was a female Senior. He received a several minute standing ovation from the whole audience. "

OK, you can agree or disagree with his "Christian" message but the whole slant was personal responsibility for your actions and the family you create. I personally believe that is missing in our society today and needs to be re-introduced at many levels.

Flame suit is ON.

So what's wrong with the world, rebels with unproductive lives, or CEO millionaires? which is it?

 

[palmtreegirl]

I agree with him.

 

[scoutie]

This wasn't a CEO, it was a high school social studies teacher.

Ha ha! When you quoted me, I had to check my post out, because I didn't think I actually wrote that. Apparently, I should not post on little sleep. I had CEO in my brain from the title, I guess. Thanks for correcting me.

[QUOTEGaga who says, "I was born this way" promote ridiculous messages][/QUOTE] What ridiculous message? That it's ok if people are gay because God made them that way? That's what the song is about.

 

[moon]

If a couple decides to have children, I'd expect their number one priority to be to their child and family... regardless of their working situation.

Beautiful, MrsDuck

 

[NYDisGuy]

I waited to post until I got first-hand info. I know this teacher and the class/school choose him for a reason: he is a beloved teacher with strong morals and they know his beliefs. My 3rd cousin was in the graduating class and several of my relatives were in the audience. I regret not being able to be there in person.

I asked my cousin for her first-hand summary and here it is. Yes, he has a "Christian" message but, no, he is not anti-female. He spoke to the guys, too. He is against anything that destroys families and people. In that graduating class, many will not have a "career" (due to demographics) but will work minimum-wage jobs or be a SAHM. He was lifting up those who will not be highly educated and giving every student a moral goal.

"Hi, Claudia! This is ridiculous. The gist of his message is that the rebels of the 60s changed the world by encouraging free love and unproductive lives and that has now become the norm...that people like Sheryl Crowe who sings, "If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad" and Lady Gaga who says, "I was born this way" promote ridiculous messages. His example was that his kids were born to poop in the tub, but at some point, you have to grow up. They aren't saying that he also stressedt that the world doesn't need more millionaire male entrepreneurs...it needs fathers who put family first. His speech was to encourage them to be "rebels" and do the right thing, not get wrapped up in the ways of the world and do whatever makes YOU happy with no regard for others. He even mentioned "the carpenter who changed the world." I'm surprised that wasn't the point of controversy they fixated on since he dared to bring religion into a school setting. It was an awesome message, and the first person to stand up and clap was a female Senior. He received a several minute standing ovation from the whole audience. "

OK, you can agree or disagree with his "Christian" message but the whole slant was personal responsibility for your actions and the family you create. I personally believe that is missing in our society today and needs to be re-introduced at many levels.

Flame suit is ON.

Ok, ill admit im confused. It seems the message you quoted and his speech contradict each other. He doesn't want people to be rebels of the 60's but wants people to be rebels and do the right thing? That makes no sense. It seems like he wants people to go back to pre-60's and establish the SAHM and father works 40 hours a week system. I'm happy that he is financially sound and can judge others from an ivory tower but the fact is, personal responsibility and financial responsibility go hand in hand. I don't see how you can't have a career and a family at the same time. In today's age, it's almost imperative to have both unless he wants us to all go on welfare in order to put our family first.

And this seems to be the thought process of older individuals to judge the younger generation based on their musical taste and cell phone use. Yet weren't most of these people the rebels of the 60's and 70's in which drug use was rampant and they would protest someone sneezing if it meant another day off from school? People like this need to stop pushing maturity on people and let it happen naturally. Otherwise they will never learn from their mistakes.

 

[TinkerBelled]

I suppose that I think there's a big difference between a career and a job. I have grown up knowing that I want to have a career: that is, a vocation; a job that fulfills, engages and challenges me; that allows me to contribute to the world through my efforts, energies and intelligence; that gives me financial independence, so that I can choose the life I want. That said, I've also worked minimum wage jobs that I did because I had to. It would be far easier for me to leave one of those jobs--something that neither fulfilled nor engaged me, on a fundamental level.

I am very lucky to have a career that I love, and I don't plan to give it up.

The idea that I should give up my career because I am a woman is not only crazy, it's destructive. It certainly cuts off half the brain power of a country, and it encourages incredibly patronizing politics.

If a speaker wants to talk about how we should all put our efforts into our family lives, he can go for it. But the idea that simply because I'm a woman, my destiny is childcare...the mind boggles.

 

[JRawkSteady]

The idea that I should give up my career because I am a woman is not only crazy, it's destructive. It certainly cuts off half the brain power of a country, and it encourages incredibly patronizing politics.

If a speaker wants to talk about how we should all put our efforts into our family lives, he can go for it. But the idea that simply because I'm a woman, my destiny is childcare...the mind boggles.

 

[Colleen27]

I don't entirely disagree with his point, though I think his wording was archaic. Not only would gender neutral language have been more appropriate in this day and age, I think the underlying assumption that everyone will eventually have a spouse and children is flawed as well.

However, I agree that couples should make career decisions with the needs of their family in mind. It is hard these days, with people marrying and starting families at older ages when they're both already established in careers that are part of their personal identity, but "having it all" in any sort of demanding career (not just CEO or millionaire entrepreneur) is a myth. Ultimately something has to give. I don't believe that something should automatically be the woman's career nor do I think that a SAHP is the only way to make it work, but in the end it is impossible for both parents to be giving 100% to their respective careers while also giving 100% at home.

 

[TavieP]

I find his speech misogynistic, and I think it's appalling that he's spreading that kind of message to young people.

 

[jrmasm]

I cannot for the life of me figure out the connection between your employment status and the importance of your family.

 

[ZephyrHawk]

To everyone who says you can't have a career and be a good mother, I call BS. I know no person in this world better than my 93 year old grandmother...who worked. I know few people I respect as much as my mother...who worked. Growing up, my mother's best friends were like Aunts to me...and they all worked. All of these women were good to their children, good to me, and were people who I could respect for their contributions outside of the home. I have always credited stay at home moms with performing an important full time job. But don't you dare try to tell me that my mother, and my grandmother, weren't perfectly good at performing two full time jobs. They weren't super-women either, just regular folks who knew that they could, in fact, have it all.

It's not hard, people, no matter what the "experts" say. It's been going on for decades, for generations now. Many children have grown up with mothers who worked in addition to being loving, caring moms. The world has not descended into chaos.

 

[LisaR]

As a SAHM, I don't ever want to go back to the way things were in the 40's/50's/60's. I am so glad things have changed and I am thrilled that woman have so many options today. I absolutely support woman in the workplace.

But........you knew there would be a but....I think the lifestyle that *many* have now is out of control. The ridiculous amount of hours *some* families spend apart troubles me. Kids are in so many activities away from the family, electronic gadgets replace family time, and the family dinner has gone out the window. I believe we need to leave the 60's behind us, but I think we need to work on where we are now and where we want to be. I do believe the idea of family has changed significantly over time and I don't necessarily agree with the new definition. For many people I know, that means seeing their kid in passing most days and I don't believe that is a good thing.

 

[chobie]

The idea that I should give up my career because I am a woman is not only crazy, it's destructive. It certainly cuts off half the brain power of a country, and it encourages incredibly patronizing politics.

If a speaker wants to talk about how we should all put our efforts into our family lives, he can go for it. But the idea that simply because I'm a woman, my destiny is childcare...the mind boggles.

Well said. And of course it's anti-women to say such things.