Your husband sounds like a great guy!
Everyone has their preferences, but I also find that some people can be extremely nitpicky.
I'm simply thankful that my wife and I are in a position where we can afford DVC and can make these trips every year. One year we couldn't book early enough to get a room at AKV so we booked OKW. A lot of people might "refuse" to stay there? Why? It's a nice resort with a great feel to it. Another person had posted on here once that they needed to be "walked off the ledge" about a potential stay at SSR. Is it really the end of the world to stay at SSR? These are first world problems to me.
It's easy to look up room square footage. It's easy to find out how many people can be accommodated in each room size and how. It's easy to know you might not want BLT because you don't want to be in a high rise hotel. These are things you don't need to visit a resort to discover. Every resort has a different feel, but IMO, they are all nice in their own unique ways. Of course there are pros and cons to each, but I don't find anything about any of the resorts to be dealbreakers. Don't psych yourself out by focusing on the negative aspects before you even do something- you're just setting things up to fail.
Rather than focusing on the NEGATIVE, you should make a list of both what you want and don't want out of your DVC resort. Look at which resorts check which boxes and why. If your positives are checked, then you can't let something like not liking the color of the curtains bother you. It sounds like location is of primary importance, and both resorts check that box. Make some lists and see what other boxes get checked - that might help you feel better about things.
And, at the end of the day if you really don't like something, you can resell it yourself, probably with zero loss, and look into a different contract somewhere else. At the end of the day, you're never "locked in" even though it's a bit of a hassle to have to sell and re-buy somewhere else.
I re-read this post and admit I come off a bit preachy, but that's not my intent - I just think you'll realize that once you own DVC you'll very more than likely feel good about it and will enjoy your trips, so don't second guess yourself too much.