Autism and potty training - Help !!

[eellis88]

I was hoping someone on the board could help us because we have had no luck at all with the "experts" at home. We are planning another trip with autistic son this holiday season. But he is going to be 5 and still has potty issues where he goes in his "big boy pants". School, advisors, councilors, etc have helped with the autistic issues except the potty issue. Essentially they are waiting for us to fix the problem. We have tried taking him to the bathroom every 30 mins, giving "big boy" praise, etc but just seems to actually go on the potty when he wants. He knows when he needs to go. He is choosing to go in pants rather than bathroom. Obviously, this would take a lot of th fun out of this trip. At home we don't go out for longer than an hour, so it's a big problem for us. So out of ideas and hoping some one with experience has some good ideas (maybe tied in to Disney trip) or have some resources (web sites or books) that would be helpful.
Much appreciated !!! from two very tired pooped out parents.

 

[JenJen]

Why don't you use your upcoming trip as a tool for potty training. Maybe buy a Walt Disney World Video and while he is watching it tell him that "We are going to Disney soon and only big boys who use the potty can go to Disney. " I know it sounds dumb but it may work, It did for my kids LOL. Good luck I know it is frustrating.

 

[ZippyDooDah]

I feel your pain! While my son does not have autism, we were in the middle of potty training during our trip to WDW just 2 wks ago. I just took him before or after every ride and after every meal. It was very exhausting for me, and we had accidents. I offer no good advice, just moral support and prayer!

 

[mbb]

if it helps, we trained our boys at WDW

Crazy, but true

They would not "go" in their swimsuits. The swimsuits I had for them were the ones that are UV protecting - the pants were like bike pants..a tight lycra(that gave them lots of sensory feedback. Pulls ups just kept them too dry, and underwear just wasn't working.

Anyway...that entire summer (before going to WDW) we really worked hard with the social stories about potty times, we explored bathrooms everywhere (still do!)..and by the time we headed to WDW, I felt "we" were "ready".LOL!

They wore pull ups on the plane, but we did regular breaks..20-30 minutes after drinking.

We spent every afternoon in the pool...potty before putting on swimsuits 45-60 minutes in the pool, and a run back to the room for another break.

First week, they wore pull ups in the mornings, and we just did regular breaks in the parks - then into the afternoon routine.

By the 2nd week, DH and I were feeling brave enough to give just the swimsuits - under their shorts - a try.

It worked!
We felt good not to have to worry about handing out "rewards" for bathroom behaviour..we could just say "First potty, Then more Buzz".

Now that's not to say that we weren't running for bathrooms some days! We did have accidents, but we always packed extra clothes in the backpack.

Thing is, at home, they were just drinking here and there..no set schedule. At the parks, it was hot, and I knew exactly when they had a drink, and could say - 30 minutes later - LET'S GO!

When we came home, we just continued The WDW photo albums hang out in the bathroom for a while!!

Not too long after that, they were night trained too.

Sorry this was so long And I don't mean it to sound like it was easy. It wasn't...but it was something we really felt the boys were ready for. They were almost 5..now 7

HTH!!

 

[Rosie]

Hello eelis88

My DS who will be 11 tomorrow has Asperger Syndrome and ADD. He would not use the potty or toilet to poo in. When he was starting at School we felt that for his sake and those around him we needed to change that particular behaviour. We bought the softest toilet tissue we could find, let him choose a potty and a step to reach the big toilet. It didn't help unfortunately. After noting his usual times for bowel movements, we set times when he would sit on the toilet and "try". It was all done very calmly, and we discussed all the reasons why with him. The breakthrough came when we put up a reward chart in the bathroom and let him choose stickers. For some reason he really enjoyed that chart and didn't look back. Maybe a Disney chart with favourite character stickers might help?
You know when I look back I realise that Autistic people just need that little bit more help and consideration. We feared that our DS would wear nappies or pull ups forever. I hope things work out for you.

Regards
Rosie

 

[minkydog]

Why is this not part of his IEP? It's definitely interfering with his learning environment. I would push for "trip-training" to be made a part of his daily program, with goals and everything.

Our 10yo son has severe autism. His IQ is <20. He cannot talk or dress himself or take care of his own needs. However, his teachers started trip-training him at age 5 and it has "taken". Christian is 100% bowel trained and about 75% urine trained. Many days he makes it through the day in one diaper.

Your son sounds like a smart boy. I'm sure he can learn to do this. finding the key to unlock his motivation will be the trick (I'm sure I'm not telling you anything new ) So get his teachers on board immediately.

 

[eellis88]

Thank you to Rose and Minkydog for your tips. I have tried everything, we are back to the chart and stickers. His teacher at school is trying that also. I just needed to know that I am not alone in this and need to go at his pace. Thanks again

 

[Ali]

Well, have you told him that the RULE is no more peeing in your clothes? MY DS4 is somewhere on the spectrum and I told him that and he pee trained all by himself. But he is a rule boy. We also set a date, and stuck with it. No more pull-ups at all - even overnight - because it would be breaking the rule.

With pooping it is more difficult because of his fear of constipation, He was telling me when he wanted to put a pull-up on and he would go and we'd change him and that was that. He never went in his clothes. But I had an epiphany while at MGM over the summer. DS was screaming and frantic about going in to the movie about the making of Star Wars, but DH and I wanted to see it, had made 2 special trips to MGM to see it, and there was only one show left for the day so we all had to go in at one time. Typically one of us does a ride or show and then switches off so DS isn't scared. So, we're in the last row, as far away from the screens as possible, DS is climbing all over me to get away, crying, etc. He kept saying I'm scarey (scared) over and over. I kept telling him he was safe, mommy and daddy were here, etc. So, 5 minutes into the show he calms down and gets in his own chair and watches the movie. BIG BOLT OF LIGHTENING HERE - 5 minutes of bad behavior will lead to success.

So, I went home and told him he had to start using the toilet, not pull-ups for pooping. He cried, etc and kept saying he was scared. I kept firm and knew he could handle it because I had seen him in action at MGM and I knew if I went through with it, and kept calm, he would eventually get over it.



If Your son knows when he has to go, is 5 years old, is aware and can understand, and it seems to be a control issue, you could do what a friend of mine with an autistic son did - told him he could pee wherever he wanted but if it wasn't in the toilet he had to clean it up. For a few days he still peed in the corner, by his train table, etc, but after having a bucket and scrubbing for a few days he decided the toilet was a better place because he didn't have to interact more that way.

I also agree it should be in the IEP - mine had learning how to pull his pants up and down in his IEP last year because he has bi-lateral issues. He learned how to do it. Potty traind over the summer and now his OT is very happy.

 

[marj70]

I have a 4 year old (today!!, Happy Birthday A.!). We are working on the potty training thing. The only motivator I have found is Skittles candy and flushing. For a peepee he gets 1 skittle and 1 square of TP (he loves to flush it down). For a #2, 4 skittles and 4 squares (we've only done that once). He gets one last skittle for washing his hands and drying them properly.

At the very beginning I would give him a skittle just for sitting on the potty.

We've made progress, but he still has a harder time getting to the potty in time while wearing pull-ups. Naked he can do it right all day. He refuses to wear underwear or pants without the pullup on though.

 

[Mel6197]

But My DD is Autistic. She is 8 now and Potty training was HORRIBLE for us. Lived in the bathroom with her for weeks at a time. Finally she got the peeing aspect. Pooping took another 9 months, when all of a sudden the diapers were gone. She crying said how sorry she was, and can she please have a diaper. Like I was punishing her. Felt HORRIBLE. But 3 days later she got it, and we haven't looked back.

My Honest Opinion is if this trip is coming up soon(dont know what holiday your talking about, Halloween, Thanksgiving, etc..). I would back off until the trip is done. Disney is HIGH enough stress, over stimulation, crowds, new environment, sights, sounds smells,etc. If the trip is coming up soon enough, why add another stress to the trip.

(((((HUGS))))))

 

[SueM in MN]

But My DD is Autistic. She is 8 now and Potty training was HORRIBLE for us. Lived in the bathroom with her for weeks at a time. Finally she got the peeing aspect. Pooping took another 9 months, when all of a sudden the diapers were gone. She crying said how sorry she was, and can she please have a diaper. Like I was punishing her. Felt HORRIBLE. But 3 days later she got it, and we haven't looked back.

My Honest Opinion is if this trip is coming up soon(dont know what holiday your talking about, Halloween, Thanksgiving, etc..). I would back off until the trip is done. Disney is HIGH enough stress, over stimulation, crowds, new environment, sights, sounds smells,etc. If the trip is coming up soon enough, why add another stress to the trip.

(((((HUGS))))))

I think for some people, that might be the best option.
For other people, a trip, might be the best incentive.

One thing I know people do to still have the child feel wet, but not have lots of wet clothing, is to put regular underwear on and then put pullups over the top of that. That way, if you don't make it to the bathroom in time (or your child refuses to sit on the toilet when you get there), you don't have to worry about the outer pants getting weet or leaving wet spots on ride seats.

 

[jbird327]

My daughter has Fragile X and was not out of diapers until close to 8 (and night diapers until about 10). It really had to occur within her own timeframe, the traditional training techniques had no effect for her. Now at 13, she is getting ready for her 2nd trip to WDW.

 

[Leah's Mom]

my dd is 14 and autistic. "We did the potty training in a day" - There is a book out that outlines the procedures. We did behavior modification and this technique worked great! She was in diapers all the time and in ONE day we had her potty trained! I highly recommend trying it. You really have nothing to lose?! This was over 10 years ago so I don't remember the author, but I bet if you googled "potty training in one day" it would come up!
Good Luck!

 

[3kidsmommy]

My 7 year old son is autistic, mild mental retardation, adhd and sensory integration dysfunction. *I* am toliet trained. When I noticed that he was staying dry for 2 hours at a time, I just started taking him to the potty about every hour and a half. Now, it is every 3 hours. He wears underwear during the day and rarely has accidents, but NEVER feels like he has to go. He knows that when he is told it is time to go, that he HAS to try. For BM's, he feels the need for that, but only goes abotu every 3 days. He is very constipated and we are seeing a GI doc for that. At night time, he is still in a pull up because I see no sense in fighting that issue. Heck, he just started sleeping through the night--no WAY am I making him wake up to go potty! Best of luck!