"Boy---You really have your hands full!"---How would you take that comment?

[C.Ann]

I think they're acknowledging that you're doing a great job, must be very busy and they have doubts as to whether or not they could do it themselves..

Actually, I think they're complimenting you..

 

[CamColt]

They are not suggesting you can't handle your kids.. they are acknowledging that having three little ones can be can be tough sometimes.

Thats exactly what Id think. I have said it to people and I always meant it as a compliment, not at all as an insult. If people have taken it that way I would feel really bad.

 

[msdznyduck]

"And my heart is too!" That's what I would say. I always wanted a big family. I'm very blessed with my two, that's all God gave me.

I couldn't agree more...... (except I had 3, and the oldest was from a first
marriage and was almost 14 when the next was born.)

I actually had a co worker tell me I was "crazy for having another one" when I was pregnant with my 3rd, at the age of 38......I told her to mind her own business and since her daughter (although about 30), also had 2 children within 2 years, I asked her if her DD was also 'crazy".............she said "that's different, she's younger"....like that makes a difference.
I also feel very blessed that God allowed me to have the two younger ones, since I was 37 and 39 when they were born, and they were perfect. (except now that they are both teenagers, sometimes I wonder )

 

[Kermit]

I get that all the time. I only have two (so far!), but Jacob just turned 2 a few days ago and Nick is almost 5 months. Some people say it nicely. Other people practically roll their eyes. Those are the ones who bother me.

I usually say, "Yes, and it's such a blessing." I thought about saying I have my heart full, too, but a lot of people use that phrase to mean they're done having kids, and we're just warming up. I will admit that the other day when someone said that to me, I just said, "Yes, I do." I was about to give my usual comment when I realized I was wearing Nick in a sling and I was holding Jacob. I DID have my hands full, LOL.

 

[swilphil]

I get that a lot and I only have two boys, ages 2 and 4. Since my oldest has been able to walk, I've been getting comments like, "He's very busy" or "He has so much energy." Sometimes I feel like people are insinuating that he is a brat or has ADD. Don't people know that little boys are supposed to be active? I don't leave him unsupervised, so I'm usually chasing after him.

 

[Beast fan]

At DS4's first day of school this year, one of his classmates is the 4th of 5 children. I met the classmates' mother and thought to myself, "She has five kids? She looks gorgeous!"

Okay, so I'm an absolute pig! At least I didn't tell DW what I thought..... until a couple of days ago. DW actually agreed with me.

Dave

 

[Mermaid02]

"Sometimes I feel like people are insinuating that he is a brat or has ADD"

Now see, as the mother of a child with ADHD, I find that insulting.

People mean no harm, I think they are acknowledging that having young children is a 24/7 job... and they know how much time and energy it takes!!

Just wanted to add that my son can ideed be a "brat"....

 

[Aimeedyan]

I've been guilty of saying that too. I really mean it as a compliment though. I'm childless and just taking care of myself is a chore LOL. I give tons of credit to those moms I see in the malls pushing 2 kids in a stroller with the third one at their side. They must have their hands full, but do a great job with their kids.

I say it all the time too, as a compliment to those wonder moms I see how with their little ones. Not being a parent myself yet, I'm quite in awe of parents who juggle so much!

(I should also note that I have said the same to dad's out shopping, or grandparents, as well)

 

[poohandwendy]

I have heard that a million times (I also have 3 kids)...I take it as a compliment like 'wow, I give you credit"...

I always say..."yeah, but my mother had 5, so I think I got off easy" (in a joking manner)

 

[buddy&wooz]

I have three sons, and I happen to know a number of people who also have 3 boys It's something we joke about a lot, having our "hands full" etc. So whenever a new person says it to me, I tend to giggle . I don't find it offensive at all, it's just something people say, an icebreaker.

 

[gr8tpanther]

I think people say that because they can't think of anything more intelligent to say.

OR, I have a cousin who has TEN kids!!! And I say that to her all the time BECAUSE I have TWO and want to send them to her Like she would KNOW they were there!!!

OR, they just want you to know they are happy to see you enjoying your children.

I have a DD who is VERY challenging and people say that to me with her.

 

[Micca]

I think it means a couple of different things: 1) I recognize and respect the responsibility you have taken on in raising the children, and 2)Better you than me Seriously, anybody who has the job of raising children has their hands full don't they? Doesn't mean anything negative.

 

[gr8tpanther]

Seriously, anybody who has the job of raising children has their hands full don't they? Doesn't mean anything negative.

ITA

I have a friend who just had #6 and all I could say to her when I met her (didn't know her before she was prego) was "ARE YOU NUTS?"

She smiled at me and said "My husband wanted another one." YEAH AND? "ARE YOU NUTS?"

She NEVER said SHE wanted another one! ugh!

The baby is a cute baby boy and has alot of older siblings to corrupt him!

 

[huey duey & luey]

"And my heart is too!" That's what I would say. I always wanted a big family. I'm very blessed with my two, that's all God gave me.

that is exactly what I say. I also hear "God Bless you" all the time as well as "better you than me". I like to answer with he already did, and absolutley.
It really doesnt bother me much anymore (except when someone is completley nasty), we had to get used to the comments fairly early on or we would have been recluses

 

[disneygals]

My kids are now 12,10, and 8, so I don't get many comments now, although I never received an insulting one. Now when I go out to stores I find myself admiring the toddlers and babies, they are just so cute and although it was a crazy time, I loved it and miss it now.

I think people just can't help but admire your kids and want to say something to you.

 

[JVL1018]

I've gotten that before. I only have 2 kids, but they are less than 2 years apart, and when tehy were younger, like 1 and 3, I'd hear it.
My response. I KNOW! I'm going crazy, does it show? LOL
I'll be the first to admit that taking care of young kids keeps my hands full.
I take no offense to it at all.

 

[Diana Lyn]

I'm so glad this actually bothers someone else! When DD was 4mo I found out I was pg with DD2. From that day on, I got a comment from many people, mostly strangers who felt the need to comment. The worst was asking me if DD1 was mine and how did I manage to get pregnant again so soon? I usually just smile politely and nod my head saying VERY bad things to myself.

Finally DD1 started walking so it wasn't AS bad, but still every single time we go to the mall or Walmart or wherever you hear someone go....oh, my those two are very close in age.....how did you mange that? Come on people come up with something better than that!!

 

[hipporina]

We have 4 adopted kids , 9,6,4,& 4 so I do get the hands full comment a lot. It doesn't bother me, because I absolutely do have my hands full! I love it that way.

The only comments that bother me are the ones that imply there is a problem with that many kids. DH and I are almost certain that our family is not yet complete, but most people seem to think it is already bigger than we must have wanted. Yesterday, we were getting our pictures taken and the photographer was doing the whole say cheese thing with different phrases. Well, he tried "More kids" when it was just dh and me and then said "Wow, mom didn't even flinch!" Um, no, I want more.

I think some people just don't get how big of a blessing kids can be.

 

[MOMTOMOOTOO]

I have 3. 7,5, and 3 and hear that on a daily basis. No offense taken. I do fet offended though, when its just me and my 3 y/o LOL

 

[luv2nascar]

I don't think people are trying to offend you. I wouldn't be if I said you had your hands full. I have 2 kids 8 yrs apart. Youngest is 18mos old and oldest is 9 1/2. I have my hands full.

I think people are just acknowledging how hard parenting is. especially when the children are little. My SIL & BIL have 3 boys (10, 2, & 1) they younger two are 12 mos apart. Do they have their hands full ? Yes they do. They don't watch their kids as well as I would. But that is another subject.

It is hard raising kids and some people choose not to do it ever. Others chose 1 or 2 kids, etc. It is a compliment to you that you handle your children so well.