How much did your parents help you towards your first home of your own?

[Skywalker]

I have heard of parents paying for schooling and parents paying for weddings. I have never heard of parents coughing up money to pay for a couple's house. Do people ever really become adults anymore?

 

[Lilsia]

I have heard of parents paying for schooling and parents paying for weddings. I have never heard of parents coughing up money to pay for a couple's house. Do people ever really become adults anymore?

This is not a new concept. I actually think that it was more common in the past then it is now. Plus this is more of a cultural or personal belief situation. Why wouldn't you want to help your children out if you could? I don't get the mentality of people who bring kids into this world and then when they turn 18 tell them "you are on your own, nobody helped me so I won't help you, good luck". Funny how so many people have no issues getting an inheritance when the parents die, but if they want to help their kids out earlier, when they really need it, it means that young people are "not adults anymore? Maybe you are just looking at it the wrong way.

 

[a1tinkfans]

None … I’m sure it will not be that way for my own though.

 

[georgina]

My kids all live in high cost areas. DS in Seattle area will always be a renter. He has no interest in home ownership. DD in SF probably will be too, since housing is so expensive there. Other DD is married and they bought a row house in DC 2 years ago, according to the real estate websites it has appreciated abut 18% in those 2 years.

 

[toodycat]

My parents gave us a down payment that was roughly 30% of the price of the house. They did the same for my sister.

 

[Moliphino]

A 2000 SF house is not really a 'starter house'. 2 bed/1 bath 1000-1200 sf might be closer to what I consider starter. I've owned a house (multiple houses) for 30 years and still don't have one that's 2000 sf.

Houses that small are almost nonexistent near me. A starter home would be more like a 3bed/2 bath 1500 sq.ft. Cape.

 

[disneychrista]

One persons "starter home" is another persons "forever" home.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

One persons "starter home" is another persons "forever" home.

That's def. true it's just not what a starter home was intended to be when they came about in post-WWII. You generally started there stayed for several years and as your situation adjusted (usually having kids or having more kids) and your income increased you moved on up in the housing.

It's just my husband and I right now but we most def. do not live in a starter home although we plan to live here for many decades to come if we can.

 

[ronandannette]

There was quite a heated thread here a few years ago about what, if any, connection parents should have with their kids when their kids hit 18.
I understand some parents can't help much if at all financial with College, but I was surprised by the number of people who basically kicked their kids out of the house at 18 and never wanted to see them again.

Maybe you're paraphrasing in an exaggerated way? I would need to read that thread with my own eyes to believe this was expressed by any DIS parent, let alone a "number" of them.

 

[tvguy]

Maybe you're paraphrasing in an exaggerated way? I would need to read that thread with my own eyes to believe this was expressed by any DIS parent, let alone a "number" of them.

If it has been one or two, I wouldn't have been surprised. Although technically the definition of "a number" is more than two.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

If it has been one or two, I wouldn't have been surprised. Although technically the definition of "a number" is more than two.

I usually think of those as there was pre-existing issues/tensions at play rather than a manner of belief that once you're 18 don't have a relationship with the parent by virtue of being 18 and older.

 

[SL6827]

0%

 

[tvguy]

I usually think of those as there was pre-existing issues/tensions at play rather than a manner of belief that once you're 18 don't have a relationship with the parent by virtue of being 18 and older.

Well, it did surprise me, especially on a Disney forum.

 

[superme80]

For my mother in law, she wanted to see her children settled. She wanted to us to be homeowners. DH and I never asked for money. We wanted to own, but knew it would never be in California. My mother in law inherited an amount she didn't know what to do with. So she set up college funds for the grandkids, and helped her children buy homes. Her doing this let us stay in California. My kids would not have the relationship with my in laws or my parents without us living as close as do.

 

[Jangles]

parents paying for weddings

I think it makes far more logical sense to gift money towards helping your children buy bricks and mortar, than spending money on a wedding. Homes are still standing, long after marriages fail.
I have no intention of paying for the wedding of either of my children.

 

[Disneybuckeye]

Technically my parents gave us zero towards the down payment, but over my first 23 years of life they invested money for me that we used for the down payment. It was a 3bed 1 bath 1500 square foot that we paid $85k for in 1988. We also had to do some work to fix it up. My parents did give us a new washer and dryer as wedding present in addition to paying for the wedding.

We gave two of our three kids $5k to make sure they put 20% down to avoid PMI. We did have to sign letters that they were gifts. They also used investment money to help fund the down payment that my parents and DH and I saved for them over the years as well as what they saved on their own. We paid for their college and gave them all cars to help them out.

Other son lived with us for five years after college and save quite a bit of money in addition to his investments. We did not need to give him $5k to buy his house.

We also have done a lot of work on our kids homes. None of them have significant others, so many of the projects needed multiple people. DH is very handy. We helped oldest DS redo the whole first floor of his townhome with a new kitchen, half bath, updated electric fireplace, coat closet, all new paint, new lighting, updated and better placed electrical, two new appliances, and new flooring. We gave him some of the money to complete and will give the same amount to the others when they need it.

The son we did not give any money to we are redoing the master bedroom next winter and adding a master bath. We will them redo the main bath. This will be covered by the $5k we own him from the downpayment he did not need and some of the extra money we are willing to give him.

DD has a condo. She will get a bath upgrade in the next few years that we will also assist with.

 

[JAMIESMITH]

My parents bought us a new stove and microwave for our first house and my dad took a week off work to help with some pretty major issues: plumbing, insulating the attic, and overseeing having a septic tank installed. We bought a foreclosure that wasn't quite finished being built.

 

[kanerf]

One problem with today's housing market is the massive increase in the size of a standard home. My first home was a 3 bedroom 2 bath with attached garage that was just over 1200 sqft. That is a perfectly acceptable size for a home. The average should be 1200-1600 for a standard home. Instead in recent years that standard size has risen to 1800-2000 sqft or more. This is why the average home cost exceeds $400K, the houses are just too big. Good luck selling these when the interest rates go back towards 8%. When I bought my first home in 98, the rate was 9.4% and I thought I was getting a good deal. The house only cost $94K though.

 

[mjkacmom]

One problem with today's housing market is the massive increase in the size of a standard home. My first home was a 3 bedroom 2 bath with attached garage that was just over 1200 sqft. That is a perfectly acceptable size for a home. The average should be 1200-1600 for a standard home. Instead in recent years that standard size has risen to 1800-2000 sqft or more. This is why the average home cost exceeds $400K, the houses are just too big. Good luck selling these when the interest rates go back towards 8%. When I bought my first home in 98, the rate was 9.4% and I thought I was getting a good deal. The house only cost $94K though.

Not everywhere, my 1600 square foot home that was $180,000 in 98 (1 1/2 bathrooms) would be listed at $550,000 now. My property taxes went from $4000 to $13500 and go up yearly. My house was build around 1910.

 

[Aladora]

A 2000 SF house is not really a 'starter house'. 2 bed/1 bath 1000-1200 sf might be closer to what I consider starter. I've owned a house (multiple houses) for 30 years and still don't have one that's 2000 sf.

Because I was curious, I searched the city where I live and the least expensive single family house in Victoria, BC today is 1200sf, 3 br, 1 bath home that is listed for $750,000. The next lowest is a 2br, 1 bath for $765,000.

The least expensive 2 bedroom condo (1055sf) is $358,000 but has monthly condo fees of $497.33. The next least expensive is $369,000 (937sf) with monthly condo fees of $798.00!

To compare, we bought our 1100sf condo in 2005 for $190,000 and our condo fees were around $150/month.