Treadmill Nirvana and other ramblings

plutosmyfav

<font color=deeppink>Has high hopes, high apple pi
Joined
Sep 19, 2002
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OK, I think the coast is clear
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Journal, Take Two.

For those who don't know me, I'm a 41 single parent with a 4 1/2 yo son and 15 yo daughter. To date (Feb 10, 2005) I have lost almost 70 lbs as a WISHer, 48 of them since Sept 2004 with Weight Watchers.

I'm going to start off this journal with some of my old journal. I miss having it as a reference, plus it contains the definition of Treadmill Nirvana ;)

Here is a "snap shot" of how I work my plan day-to-day.

I pretty much start each day with the same breakfast (and NEVER NEVER EVER skip breakfast anymore!). Its a shake of soy milk, frozen berries and flax seed meal. It took me a little while to get used to, but now I love it and it feels great.

Monday through Friday I go to the gym without exception. I get really mad if something gets in the way of my gym workout. I do weights and cross-train on all the cardio machines.

I log all my food, even "bites" which have to be estimated. At home I weigh and measure my food to keep myself honest (its amazing how a cup of pasta can grow and grow and grow if its not measured). I try not to use my weekly flex points, but I do eat most of my APs (Activity Points). I generally earn 8-10 APs per day, only counting serious workouts. I don't count shopping, cleaning, etc. towards APs. On the weekends I try to get in at least one long distance run (6-8 miles) and try to be active as much as possible.


Sunny

December 17, 2004
Last night was a real challenge. I had that "I just want to eat and eat and eat" drive all evening. I picked at food and snacked, keeping track of my points but feeling very bad about it. I ended up eating all of my APs (10 earned at the gym) and going 5 points into my WFP (weekly flex points). I was so disappointed about it that I ended up doing 50 minutes of Pilates at 10PM. I'm not sure how to count APs for Pilates so I called it 3. I went to bed feeling much better psychologically and wonderful physically. I have to remember Pilates is a great relaxer in the evening and do it more often!

Today is my work holiday party. I know the food choices will be terrible for points. I'm a bit stressed over it already. I'm finding that I just want to eat more and more. I don't know if its just the holiday season or if I'm starting to slip into old mindsets. I still don't trust myself.

The scale was my friend this morning! I weighted 176.5 lbs. That's my best weight since 1997. Its not an official weigh in, but I do weigh every morning just to see the weekly trends. Monday is WI day.

Sunny

1:21 PM Just back from the holiday party. I think I did alright. I'm estimating about 10 points for lunch and about 10 points for desserts. Its off to the gym after work for a serious workout!



Dec 18, 2004 8:16 PM
UGHHHHH I need to take a minute and get my head on straight. First of all, I really over did it at the gym last night. I haven't quite got this "moderation" thing down yet (that will be my New Years Res). I stressed over eating high fat foods at the holiday party, mostly because I wasn't sure how to estimate them. So I burned and burned at the gym, to the tune of 1300 calories. Yikes I felt really wiped out and a bit nauseous for a couple of hours afterward.

This morning I weighed 175.5 lb on my Tanita scale. WOW! That was unexpected. I know its not real, I expect/hope for a WI of ~176 on Monday, but it was quite a fun shock. But now I am reaching for a few points here and there. No APs today and I am already 7 points into my WFP. I must stop NOW! I'm half tempted to do my Pilates tape after DS goes to bed. We'll see. I know part of my desire to eat is from stress from DD. My daughter is 15 and is one of the most dramatic teen agers I've yet to meet. Today was an all out blow out. So hoping for a better day tomorrow.

In 2002/2003 I gained somewhere around 60 pounds primarily as a result of my inability to deal with her problems. This year I am taking care of myself. I cannot destroy myself anymore. It certainly doesn't help her any. One of the things I have come to realize is the role bingeing plays in my emotional regulating. I've known for a long time that huge quantities of sugars/carbs causes a brain chemistry shift, providing a form of anesthesia. But what I've come to realize on top of that is the way bingeing takes the focus off the real problems. When I'm bingeing, front and foremost in my mind is "how am I going to stop this binge, how much weight will I gain, how will I get this weight off, how many calories have I consumed, what else will I eat, etc. etc. etc", the real problems take a BIG back seat. So without bingeing, I am forced to face the real problems right here, right now. Not fun! But it sure beats the price of a binge.

Well, I actually feel better after posting! I think I can stay out of the kitchen now. Woo Hoo

Dec 19, 2004
Today I weighed 177.5 lb. Up 2 pounds from yesterday's weight but that's no biggie. I knew that weight was a fluke. Just hope to be 176 or 176.5 tomorrow. No WW WI tomorrow. I do WW at work and we don't start up again until Jan 3rd. I might go to a local center and get weighed in. Haven't decided yet. DS is coloring Nascar coloring books. DD is still in bed. I'm sipping tea. All is good for the moment

Sunny

Dec 20, 2004
This is another UUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHH day. I baked Oatmeal Scotchies yesterday and lost control. I ate a bunch of batter and two cooked cookies plus loads of crumbs (they all fell apart, I don't know why). I was mindful to estimate the points as they were going down... About 32 points in Scotchies. (that's 32 ontop of a full day's food). Oh bother. I did TaeBo twice and a Salsa Cardio tape but the scale was not amused. Today's morning Tanita weight was 179.5 lb. That's up .5 from last Monday, and up 4 lbs from my 'low sighting' on Saturday. I'm so mad at myself. I'm going to WI at a WW center tomorrow and that will be my official weight for this week and for my New Year's Challenge. I'm guzzling the water like crazy today. Hopefully, I will be able to report a loss, even a .2 lb would be ok

Note to self: Skip the baking next year! Everyone complains that there's too much food around the holidays anyway. They won't miss my batch. I still have ingredients for choc. chip cookies, fudge and rice crispie squares. I'll do some on Christmas Eve since that is a designated Flex Point Allowance day.

So today is Monday, the first day of my WW Week which includes Christmas. Hmmm, I better get serious. I know I won't be able to get in any meaningful workouts on Christmas day and probably not on Christmas Eve, either.

I read http://www.skinnydailypost.com today and that was really helpful. I need to keep this holiday eating stress in perspective. It will end soon!!!!!!

Sunny

Dec 21, 2004

I made it to the WW center for an official WI today. Down 2 lbs. YIPPEEE! TOM also arrived this morning so that probably is the cause of the wild fluctuations the past couple days. I didn't snack after dinner last night and didn't use my APs. I ran 6 miles in 64 minutes on the treadmill for my workout yesterday.

I have some sore spots from TaeBo. I haven't done TaeBo in years and then I did two sessions on Sunday. I'm not sure if its healthy muscle soreness or if I have minor strains. I will be a little more careful next time I do TaeBo. As for the Salsa Cardio dance-- I discovered I am TOTALLY uncoordinated. It was a total body mutiny-- arms, hips, legs, nobody was listening to me. I made sure the curtains were closed. It was quite a site.

My Christmas shopping is done. I just need to make a couple of food stops before Christmas. One to Whole Foods to get some great fruit and veggies and one to my regular grocery store to get Christmas Eve dinner, Christmas breakfast stuff. We'll be having CHristmas dinner at my parents. The menu doesn't sound real WW friendly so I may bring some 0 pt veggies with me.

There was a woman getting her "Hundred Pound" magnet at the WW meeting I attended today. That was really inspiring. She started her journey Jan 13 last year. Wow!

Sunny


Dec 23, 2004
Wow, time is flying now. Yesterday was too busy to post. Today was supposed to be a half day at work but DS has OT(occupational therapy) in the AM and I wouldn't have gotten in more than 2 hours at work so I just went to the gym instead! I had a great time. 25 minutes on the StairMaster, 30 minutes elliptical and ~4.5 miles on the treadmill. A total of 1200 calories burned, or 12 APs. This is in preparation for not being able to exercise the next two days.

But now I'm tired and I have LOTS to do!!! The house needs a "once over" and I do plan to do some of the baking I originally set out to do. I better rethink that and make sure I'm strong enough before any flour flies.

Well DS is having tv stress, so I better sign off for now!

Sunny

Dec 26, 2004

Christmas Eve: I got an early start to cleaning and baking. I baked choc. Chip cookies, rice crispy squares and pumpkin spice bread without any trouble. It was busy, fun day. I was worried I wouldn’t get any exercise in—HA that’s a laugh, I was moving briskly all day. I ended the day OP with about just 8 flex points left for Christmas day but I wasn’t worried.

Christmas Day:
We had a wonderful morning opening gifts. I just ate ½ a grapefruit because there wasn’t time to stop for a shake (DS was in high gear and needed CONSTANT attention with his new toys). I got an unexpected chance to go for a run before heading down to my parents. It was WONDERFUL! I ran 6 miles in 62 minutes. The trip to my parents was great and I started out really careful with my food choices. I got another chance to sneak out for a quick run (2 miles) I was psyched. Then around 6PM I made the decision to go OFF PLAN. I just decided I wanted to eat without worry of how many points and just did it. At first I enjoyed the food but by the time I went to bed I felt really sick.

The Day After:
I got up this morning feeling awful and before I could formulate a plan, popped a cookie in my mouth! Today has been completely off plan. Physically I feel like crap. But somehow I think I needed this little break from strict OP eating???? I hope I’m not deluding myself. I plan to be totally OP tomorrow which is the start of a new WW week for me. I will go to the local WW center for WI on Tuesday regardless of how I feel.

Today I rented “Super Size Me”. It was a real eye opener and just the kind of motivator I needed in the midst of my cookie/chocolate binge. I highly recommend it if you haven’t seen it.

I got the FIRM 3 in 1 series for Christmas! I don’t know if I will brave a session today, but definitely tomorrow if not!!!! I can’t wait to join the WISH Firmies

Sunny
 
Dec 27, 2004 The Aftermath

Well I feel like crap today. I weighed myself on my Tanita this morning and I'm up 4 pounds since Christmas day I know its probably only 1 lb of real gain but UUUGGGHHHHH. Today's plan:

1) Eat target points-- no more, no less. Write every bite
2) Snow Shovelling
3) The Firm workout (I won't eat my APs today)
4) 1 gallon of water
5) 6 zero point veggies
6) More exercise anyway I can get it

At least today is the beginning of a new WW week for me which helps psychologically.

Yesterday was awful (eating wise). I not only ate cookies, chocolate etc. all day, I drank NO water, ate NO veggies or fruits and had virtually no fiber and didn't move my bod on bit. Talk about Dr. Jekly and Mr. Hide!!!!!!! An interesting thing happened, too. I went to a Chinese takeout (why not I was on a binge). I saw my reflection in the window and it shocked me. In the midst of my binge I was suddenly 240 lbs again, but the person I saw in the window was thin and fit. It really struck me how messed up my mind can get in binge mode. I don't want to do it again. I'm going to come up with some notes to tuck away for next Christmas to try to help me not fall into this again. I did so great with Thanksgiving, I guess I was a bit cocky. Never again!

Sunny


Hi Everyone, Thanks for the kind words and encouragement.

Today is much better. I am down one of the four pounds, better than nothing. I almost stuck to my plan yesterday. I got the water in, did Firm, TaeBo, snow shovelling. I ate 4 zero point veggies but I went over on points. So far the overage comes out of my weekly flex points so I'm not off track yet, but yesterday was the first day of the week!!!!! DS is home with me today so I'm not going to the Woburn center WW for WI, but I will be able to go to another center tomorrow (hopefully). Even if its a gain, I want to get my official WW WI this week.

Its a strange thing, I look forward to this time so much, the holidays and the time off from work and yet I find myself really wishing to get back into my normal routine. January/February are usually my worst months for feeling "blue" and eating out of boredom/depression so I am really glad I will be in a WW session this year for those months. 2005 should be the year I reach goal

Sunny


December 30, 2004
2 of the 4 pounds are gone now. Yesterday was a totally ON PLAN day with mega exercise. I feel sooooo much better. I'm hoping the last two pounds drop before the New Year's Challenge is over but I'm not going to stress over it. I have the basement set up as a gym/activity room now. We have a punching bag (DD's Christmas present), a stability ball, a trampoline (which only DS can use due to the low ceiling) and DS has his toy punching bag. Its quite cold down there so it will keep us motivated to MOVE while down there! I'm hoping to get a tv/DVD so I can bring my TaeBo and FIRM workouts down there.

Notes for Next Christmas:
No baking period.
Carefully planned holiday treats instead of stockpiling chocolate
Preplanned activities for the week after (I was a slug and didn't do anything fun with DD/DS this time).
Preplanned child care for the day after Christmas so I can get right back to the gym. That makes all the difference for me to keep on track.
Read and re-read the notes I put in my food journals to remind myself how awful it feels to be out of control.

If I think of more, I'll add them later

Sunny
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Well today is New Year's Eve and all but .5 lb are gone. I will be reporting in my final results for the New Year's Challenge after this post. I ended with a 6 pound loss, putting me at 6/8/2. I knew I set my goal too high, but I'm not bummed at missing it, 6 is an unbelievable loss over the holidays for me! I don't believe I have ever lost weight over the holidays before

I feel soooooooo much better being back on plan. I wrote myself a letter to remind myself how terrible it feels to be out of control. I will read it frequenty!

I don't have any plans for today/tonight. I've never been a New Year's Eve party person, usually order chinese, rent movies and pig out on left over Christmas goodies. Not this year! No Chinese, no goodies (they've all been removed from the house already). I may settle in for the extended version of Return of the King. Maybe try to watch it on my stability ball LOL

Anyhoo, I feel good and optimistic today. I can't wait until WW starts up again at work on Monday. I felt lost this week!

Sunny


Happy New Year January 1, 2005

I am soooooooo excited this morning. I am down the .5 of Christmas plus ONE MORE! I weighed 174.5 on my Tanita scale this morning. This means I get to do a New Year's Clippie dance. Yeah ME

I didn't end up watching ROTK but I did watch TV on my stability ball. That actually is a workout. I'm going to do it more often. Sometimes I would just sit and balance, others I would do a bit of rolling around

Today I will be brining Joshua (DS) down to my parents for a visit. I will do TaeBo before going down just in case I don't get another chance to exercise today.

I am doing Lisa's "Lose 5 in January" challenge so I will call my starting point 174.5. That means I should end January no higher than 169.5. Wow that would be the first time in the 160s since motherhood (~16 years). How exciting.

I just want to mention how wonderful it felt to wake up feeling thin on New Year's Day. I woke up and realized my torso felt "compact" not bloated and oozing over the bed like many, many years past. Remember this Sunny! Don't fall in that trap again

Sunny

January 3, 2005

I have to post quickly. I am at work. One of my NYR is to be more diligent at work.

I was doing great New Years Day. I did TaeBo ate a super low point lunch and headed to my parents house for a visit. My Mom made chilli, pizza and nachos for dinner. In a split second I decided I was going to "eat my fill". So the day ended way off plan. But THEN I got up yesterday feeling lousy (hmmm, I wonder why?) and continued eating. I did no exercise at all yesterday and ate like a pig. So I wrote myself another letter and started fresh again today. I'm not even going to report the water blip on the scale this morning

Today was supposed to be our first WW at Work meeting this session but it turned out to be a registration session instead. In antipication of having to get on the scale I skipped lunch and went to the gym and sweated out as much water as I could before WI. We did get to do unofficial WI so I found out I was down 3 lbs since my last WW WI on Dec 20th. So the sweating trick worked. That's the first time I played games with my WW WI. I will be good from now on

Better run, I'll try to be back this evening

Sunny


Hi Everyone!

I'm on plan and that is good. I have been dealing with some pretty big stress with my daughter. Two days ago we had a really tough time and I felt that old feeling of "I've got to eat mounds of food" but I didn't give into it. Instead I did two sets of Tae Bo after putting DS to bed. This type of stress is what caused be to balloon over 60lbs in 2003. Its a feeling of helplessness and hopelessness. My daughter needs a lot of help but no one can help her until she wants it. But I have to somehow hold onto my own well being and not fall back into destructive patterns. I have to admit I have an underlying sense of "want" that has been around since our blowout on Tuesday. I just want food, I just want to eat. I just WANT PERIOD! But I won't give in!!!!!

Yesterday's workout was blahh. I did alot and earned 8 aps (burned 800 calories) but I was begrudging the process the whole time! I'm not worried though, I have been at this exercise thing long enough to know its ebbs and flows. Just when you think you can't do it again, there's a major break through in strengh, speed and/or endurance. So I'm looking forward to the peak

On a positive note. DS (Joshua, 4 yo) and I have been watching our one hour of tv per day on our bouncy balls! He got one of those bouncy balls with handles for Christmas and I have a stability ball. So we watch "Fairy Odd Parents" and "Sponge Bob" on our balls now. Its not a workout but it keeps your muscles engaged the whole time. Most of the time I just sit, but occasionally I'll do some crunches or just roll around a bit Every little bit helps!!!!!

Sunny
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Thanks everyone

Sharon: I actually started my gym membership in April 2001 and have gone pretty consistently ever since. That was about 9 months after my son was born, I was desparately out of shape (I had 8 weeks of bed rest before delivery). I started with about 20 minutes walking on the treadmill at ~3.0 mph. After a few weeks I got real brave and climbed up on one of those elliptical trainers. It was instant love I quickly became addicted and worked harder and longer. After many months I decided to cross train and do some weights. My love/hate relationship with the treadmill has been steady eversince My guess would be that it was a solid year before I actually tried running on the treadmill and even then it was only 4.5mph. It really has been a gradual process to get to where I am now.

Thanks for the hugs and compliments. That'll keep me going all day

Now I am contemplating sneaking out of work early to get to the gym. The snow/sleet/ice is getting bad. I'm afraid if I wait too long the daycare might call and say their closing early and I'll miss my workout.

Sunny
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Ok, January 7, 2005
Is it the January/February Blues? I am having a horrible time with wanting to devour mass quantities of food. I know I always have the worst time in the January/Feb months. Its dark when I get up, its dark when I leave work. Its cold, all the fun of the holidays is over, blah blah blah. I know I usually comfort myself through these months with food. Not gonna do it!

Last night I created a thought tool. Its not all that profound, but it really struck me. It goes like this: I am instantly back in my 240 lb body with all the discomforts that it held. The full memory of being that weight and feeling hopeless has returned. Then I am given 2 choices: 1) remain in the body and eat with abandonment-- no rules, no limits. or 2) return to my current fit body and fight tooth and nail to stave off the Hungry Horrors. Well the choice is obvious and immediate! But I don't live in that thought experiment. I live in a place where I think I can scheme little compromises. "well, if I eat with abandoment just this weekend and then formulate a torture treadmill routine on Monday-Friday maybe I could get away with it...." Its these schemes that will break me, not the holidays! These schemes can pop up any day, any week, with or without fanfare.

So I am trying to reframe my mind to live in the 2 choice reality. That doesn't mean I can't splurge. But splurges need to be planned and still remain in control. What I just can't go back to is mindless, endless consumption. IT IS NOT AN OPTION!

Okay, so I'm white-knuckling it today. The Hungry Horrors are howling but I will not bend or break Yesterday's workout was blah, too. But I did it! Snow shoveling in the morning, snow shoveling in the evening and the gym inbetween. I pretty much threw a temper tantrum inside my head about having to workout. But I worked out. Guess the peak is still a ways off...

Oh, and I am up 1.5 lbs this morning. I know its water but geesh, I'm holding off the monster, the scale should applaud me!!!!! But then again, I woke up with a big zit this morning so maybe its all hormonal

(a little dramatic? well, hey, I'm in a battle here!!!!)

Sunny


January 9, 2005
I've been so excited all day to hear about our WISH Walkers (and a little disappointed I'm not one of them). Today has been pretty good. Its been a tough weekend. The garage door opener broke Friday night. The garage is the main way we entry/exit the house, especially in the snow and ice. So we are climbing under a 3 foot opening for the moment. At first I was "psyched" to get all the extra exercise from the snow, but enough is enough. I was out there again today chipping ice and cleaning up. But I have to say, it is quite an abs workout. I never realized that before I had abs!!! In fact, I used to end up with severe back pain from shovelling. So I'll count that as a great NSV. Alls quiet on the Teen front, so that's good. I'm really considering doing FLORE (WW CORE but count points as if on FLEX). I just know the sugar and flour is getting to me. It makes me mad, but if CORE foods will settle my hungry horrors then that's what I'll need to do.

I fixed some loose tiles in the bathroom this weekend and made a mess. It took me a couple of hours of heavy scraping to get the gunk back off of them. I was tempted to add it to my exercise mintues but I won't I did the FIRM legs, hips (I can't remember the name of it) and TaeBo Basic I (Get Ripped). Plus the shovelling and a little extra cardio thrown in here and there...

I signed up for a "Get Fit" team at work. We are having a campus wide fitness challenge running Jan 9- March something (12 weeks). We form teams of 6-8 and report our weekly minutes. I don't know yet if there are weekly, monthly or just one big prize but it should be motivating anyway.

Guess that's it for now. I just can't wait to hear back from the WISH Walkers!

Sunny


Jan 11, 2004
YAHOO I hit the peak!!!

treadmill.gif
TREADMILL NIRVANA
I'm going to try to attempt to put in words what Treadmill Nirvana feels like I start out fully aware of my surroundings, people talking, machines pounding in asynchronous rythms, music in the background, 6 tvs on the wall in front of me, mostly tuned to news channels. I set my course to manual, time to 30 minutes (I've been pushing with 60 minute runs, today I'll settle for 30). Enter my weight (8 pounds light so I feel confident the calorie burn is not exagerated) and off I go. At first I am aware of the sound of my feet pounding the tread, I adjust my posture, get my headphones chord situated. Soon I realize I'm thoroghly enjoying myself. My shoulders are back, chest high, abs tight. TIGHT! My legs feel like well oiled machines doing their thing without any input from me. They just move. The movement is fluid and free and effortless. I feel invinsible, I could do this forever. I have no cares no worries. I am not aware of anything in my life for this moment. No stresses, no anger, frustration. NOTHING! I'm no longer aware of the room, the people, tvs, sounds. My eyes are fixed on a little spec on the green floor. They've been parked there for 10, 15, 20 minutes who knows. Who cares. In my peripheral vision I can see green sneakers cycling. They are lime green. That makes me smile. I suppose they are attached to a person, it is of little consequence to me. The music in my headphones is the only thing my mind registers. It is fantastic. I don't remember it sounding so good before. Every song pumps me up more than the one before. SOmeone walks between me and my spec and I am jolted back to reality for a minute. Darn! All of the sudden I realize I am getting tired and I am tempted to look at the time. No don't look yet! Make it last alittle longer before you start the "30 second mind games". Alas, I've come to the 30 second mind games. I don't exactly know what it is I bargain, but somehow I bargain to make it another 30 seconds. I glimpse at the time again, phew, made it! 30 seconds more... until the machine kicks into cool down.

That baby, is Treadmill Nirvana

That is what keeps me coming back when the workouts are blah and every thing in my being screams "I DON'T WANT TO WORK OUT TODAY"

I also did elliptical for 20 minutes and StairMaster for 20. When I noticed the StairMaster logo I remembered Teresa's "Stairs-to-hell machine" and that made me smile for several seconds before the ache in my quads brought me back.

Oh, and I did 30 minutes upper body weights and abs at lunchtime. Two trips to the gym-- maybe I'll do that a couple times a week. It gave me time to rest between weightlifting and cardio.

Sunny


January 12, 2005
Good MOrning all,

Boy was it hard to get up this morning. Dark, gray, cold and more snow. Now its raining. I stayed off the scale this morning. It is pretty scary but I thought I would try at least one morning of not weighing. I swear I want to eat more just because I didn't get on the scale. Weird.

Yesterday was a good day. I stayed OP and got a 52 minute workout at the gym at lunchtime. That is really pushing my lunchhour but I wasn't able to go after work. I am thinking about doing a "two trip" day today. Go for weights at lunch and then cardio after work. We'll see.

Nothing else to report at the moment Looking forward to Spring

Sunny


Well I made it for a second trip to the gym today. I did 20 minutes rowing (I really don't like that), 30 minutes recomb. bike with a good magazine (I don't work as hard when reading but its fun) and 20 minutes elliptical. I also drank a EAS low carb drink right afterwards. I've been getting too hungry between leaving the gym, picking up DS and getting home to make dinner. The EAS works well. Its 2 points and 15 g of protein plus lots of minerals, etc.

The garage door is still broken. With the snow in front of the house it is dangerous for us to walk out and around so we keep climbing under. It must look quite amusing to see us head out inthe morning with lunchboxes, gym bag, tea cup, etc. crawling out of the tiny space. Oh well, it will take time and money. I have neither. DS thinks its fun. DD is not amused.

Well off to

Sunny


January 14, 2004
Gulp, what have I done? I not only joined the Stay Off The Scale Challenge, I started it! That means I'm the leader and have to set a good example. Or course I'm being a bit of a wuss and holding onto one mid-week WI in addition to my Monday WW WI. Baby steps off the scale....

Yesterday was good. Food was OP, workout was: 20 minutes Stair@#%*@Master, 35 minutes treadmill (ran at 6.2 mph woo hoo) and 10 minutes elliptical. But the weekend is here and that's my biggest challenge. I really have to commend all the SAHM who stay OP all week long. When I'm home and have access to the kitchen I really struggle. I haven't switched over to CORE but I have been tracking my points both as Flex and Core and find that I am eating 50% of my points from core foods. That seems to make a big difference in my ability to stay away from the sweets. I still have a little but it appears to be in control for now.

The garage door is still busted but I finally got smart and removed a little spring that was not allowing the door to go more than about 2 1/2 feet up. Now it still gets caught on something but it opens to a good 3, maybe 3 1/2 feet. It feels like luxury only hunching down that far after the full squat we've been doing the past week.

Well that's it for now. Have a fantastic Friday everyone!

Sunny
 
January 16, 2005

Hi Everyone

Jay-nee my gym is at work, its a 2 minute walk across the parking lot! So I sometimes go at lunchtime and eat my lunch at my desk, or go afterwork and then pick up my son (the daycare is part of my work also, but down the road a mile). OR, sometimes I do both! I take for granite how fortunate I am sometimes.

Teresa-- I have another tip for weekend exercising. I started doing this a few months back. Wear weights while doing chores! I have 2 1/2 lb wrist weights and adjustable upto 5 lb ankle weights. I haven't used the ankle ones too much yet, but when I first started using the wrist ones I could hardly use my arms. Now I hardly notice if I have them on. I'll wear them to do laundry, dusting, vaccuuming, etc. just not the wet stuff. I've even worn them grocery shopping under a big sweat shirt! Again, its the "every little bit helps" stuff that adds up.

Garage Door Update: I took all the parts out of the box, cleaned up the garage enough that you can move around in thre and begun assembly. I have the rail, trolly and motor unit all together, just one final step on attaching the belt to a belt/bolt/spring thingy on the trolly and it'll be ready to attach to the door and the ceiling. Dad and bro are planning to come out tomorrow for that part.

I ended up snacking alot last night and used up my flex points. Today's my last day of the WW week so I should be okay. I ended up doing TaeBo Get Ripped Basic I and II last night after Joshua went to bed. So far today I've done the Firm Total Muscle Shaping. Snows on its way so shoveling might be how I round out my workout today!!!

Sunny


January 19, 2005Hi Everyone,

I only have a minute to post. I'll get back to reading journals later today (I hope!).

I stayed home sick yesterday and haven't exercised for two days in a row. I feel like crap. Plus Monday brought TOM and bad eating. Blah.

But the good news is my Dad and brother helped me get the garage door opener installed on Sunday so we are living in luxury now!!!!!

It was really hard to stay off the scale yesterday and today. I want to know what kind of damage I did eating on Monday. But I didn't get on it. If I could get as consistent and disciplined about my eating as I am with exercising I'd have this thing beat. But the food continues to be my downfall. I'll be really lucky if I lose any weight for January, never mind the 5 lbs I challenged for in Zera's 5 in January Challenge. Poor me I can hear the whine in my voice. Yuck! A good workout should get me back on track...

Sunny



January 19, 2005

Well, just as I figured, a couple of great workouts today and I feel back in the game. I wrote myself yet another letter Reminding myself that bingeing never, ever, ever makes me happy.

Okay, so first stop at the gym was upper body weigths and abs. Then on a whim I decided to throw in some intense lunges. Sure, why not, its an upper body day, the legs aren't warmed up, go for it. I pulled something in my left glute. OOOOOUUCH. But that didn't stop me from returning after work for cardio.

5.66 miles on the treadmill, not nirvana but pretty darn close once I stopped noticing the pain.
30 minutes on the elliptical.

For food I've had 4 zero pt veggies and 4 fruits. Yahoo. What a difference it makes in my appetite. I ate much better today. After reading Melanie's new journal I decided I really need to enforce the no night-time eating policy, too. Others have listed it in there goals and I've managed to sidestep the issue but the fact of the matter is, most of my damage happens after 8PM. So 8 PM is my cut off for now. Yikes I'm scared, tonight will be the first night of the new plan

I made a "creamed cauliflower" tonight. I boiled the cauliflower until it was mashable, then added some ff margarine and ff half and half, salt and pepper. It was pretty good. I need to come up with some more ways to make veggies tastey.

Enough for now, Night all

Sunny

PS, I need to come up with a systematic way to read through the journals. If I've missed yours, please know it was an accident! I never can get through them all in one sitting and then they get all shuffled as others post Then I get confused!


January 20, 2005Well I made it through my first "no eating after 8" day and I feel great! I had trouble sleeping since I am used to knocking myself out with carbs but the bod WILL adjust.

Today was easy to stay off the scale. Yipee. TOmorrow i get my wimpy "mid week" WI.

I brought a huge salad, some of the left over creamed cauliflower, a boca burger, grapes and an orange for lunch. Total 6 pts.

I am working on a plan/schedule for the weekend. I know if i can make it through the weekend without a slip I will see results on my Monday WW WI. I think I'll do a two-trip gym plan today

Its cold. It snowed. I shoveled. Blah.

Sunny

January 20, 2005
I did some investigating. Here is what I discovered: I have had 10 bad days over the past 30 days! That's 33% OFF PLAN. No wonder I don't have any results to report for the January 5 lb challenge yet!

My WW honeymoon ended Dec 19th. That was the first day I went off plan since joining WW Sept 13, 2004. Its been a big battle ever since.



Date: Pts, APs Earned, Notes
12/19 Sunday 71 8

12/25 Saturday 80 9 Christmas, started eating ‘off plan’ 6PM
12/26 Sunday ??? 0 Out of control all day
12/28 Tuesday ??? 0 Out of control all day, vacation day

1/1 Saturday 70 4 New Years Day, started eating ‘off plan’ 6PM
1 /2 Sunday ??? 0 out of control all day

1/8 Saturday 120 0

1/16 Sunday 70 5 started eating off plan at 8PM
1/17 Monday 120 0 MLKJ Holiday, home all day


So what can I gather from this? All my eating takes place on "home" days such as weekends and hollidays/vacation days. Out of control days follow a decision to eat "off plan" late in the day. Each time I did that, my intention was to just enjoy a meal and a dessert and get back on track the next day. It hasn't worked THREE TIMES IN A ROW!!!!!!! I'm still working on my weekend strategy...

Stay tuned

Sunny

January 21, 2005
Ok, I have a bit a of plan for the weekend. I am going to pick up some wonderful fruit and vegetables tonight. It is currently 0 deg with a –18 deg F wind chill. The weekend is supposed to be worse. So getting outdoors is probably NOT going to happen. Exercise will be videos and playing with Joshua.

I am going to allow myself to use my flex points (20 on Sat, 5 on Sun IF I want to) plus I will probably eat my APs. Maybe I'll put together a menu before today is done. Exercise doesn't have to be intense, just make sure I'm moving the bod.

I have made a template for checking in two hour windows. I may not actually check in every two hours but I will record pertinent information when I do check in like what I’ve eaten and what exercise I’ve done. This should hold me accountable for the whole weekend. I will edit this post through out the weekend and then post my Monday WI. Let’s hope this gets me through!!!! Subzero weather is NOT helping!!!!

I'm also going to add an "On Plan" counting clippie. I need to get into the double digits on back-to-back OP eating again.



Saturday:
4 fruits
4 vegetables
20 flex points optional
100 minutes of exercise

6:00 Boy am I glad I formulated a plan yesterday! Woke up to NO POWER, I started packing for evacuating for the day (the house got down to 50 deg F really fast) but just about the time I was ready to start making calls to "invite my family over" the power came back on. It has me a bit spooked since it is -8 deg and not expected to get above 10 deg today. Such a start to the day could have been a license to eat
Anyway, Breakfast was a 3pt Egg Beater and onion, pepper omlet and 1 pt of fresh pineapple and fresh watermellon. I am STUFFED for 4 points! Sidenote: A blizzard is on the way, snow is a major binge trigger for me. It all started years ago because Dx plows. He'd be gone during snow storms which left me lonely and gave me "open season" to stuff my face without being seen. I still get that instant impulse to eat when it snows. I will NOT give in
8:00 exercised from 9 to 10: TaeBo and Firm Fat Blasting Cardio. I'm going to call that 5 APs.
10:00
12:00 Well the power went out again around 11:00 and back on in 10 minutes. Looks like it could be a rough storm. I had lunch at 11:45. A large garden salad with seseame tofu and a bowl of flavored oatmeal (total 8 pts). Joshua is sick. All the more reason I hope we don't have to go looking for shelter in subzero weather I have had all my required veggies for the day but I know I will eat more with dinner. I feel great!
2:00 Just finished putting together Joshua's Rokenbok. What a great toy. I got him the starter set and the recycle center for Christmas. We put aside the recycle center and forgot about it! So today we put it together. By far the best toys I've bought, bar none!!!! I had a 1 pt hot chocolate while assembling Holding strong!!!!!! Snows on its way, looks like its in Worcester already.
4:00 Well once again WISH came through! I was really starting to faulter. I ate some unplanned spaghetti (4 pts). A (planned) Amy's frozen vegetable pie (2pts) and some dark chocolate (5 pts). I had such strong "keep going" urges, but I stopped by some journals before checking in here and "voila" the urges have passed. Amazing! I know I'm not out of the woods. When I say Jan/Feb are my worst months, I should specify "jan/feb SNOW STORMS" are my worst ever times. I have fought the urge to jump in the car and go "stock" up for the storm. I don't mean water, batteries, I mean donuts, ice cream , you know, the REAL storm staples. But alas, its blizzard conditions now and I am stuck in a house filled with fruit and vegetables How can this be? 5:15PM Holding (pretty) Steady! Thanks WISHers for being there
6:00
8:00I can't believe I've made it to 9:26PM without incident!!! I strapped on my ankle weights and wrist weights and made up my own step aerobics with weights for 30 minutes while Joshua played xbox. It wasn't the same caliber as the Firm, but it got me sweaty So that brings my exercise to 90 minutes for today. Sonya called and needed a ride home. I was urked, but gladly went to get her rather than a friend possibly driving her in the storm. It was actually fun, the roads were empty except for the plows, the snow is so beautiful. Its only 13 deg so the snow is extremely sparkly and light. I started some shoveling when we got home. Its like shoveling Splenda Light as a feather. Could hardly call it exercise! I will probably go back out in an hour for some more. Almost seems silly since its falling so fast, but I try to keep up with it.
10:00 more shoveling, very hungry. Ended up having pizza and cake with Sonya. It broke my "no eating after 8" rule but still on plan. I used all my APs and my Flex points. No wiggle room tomorrow.
midnight to wake Slept lousy. Kind of scared about power.


January 22, 2005
Speaking of subzero weather... we woke up to NO POWER this morning! I was really scared because I left my gas tank on about 1/8 tank and I wasn't sure I'd be able to start the van if we needed to evacuate. It is -8 deg F. The house got down to 50 deg before the power came back on. Now there's a blizzard on the way....


Okay, I'm going to check in on my Weekend Accountability Post now

Stay Warm!

Sunny

January 23, 2005In a hurry, just want to post some snow pics!

snow1.jpg


snow2.jpg


snow3.jpg


snow4.jpg


See those piles? Those are MY piles! I think they are 20 Activity Point Piles

And boy do I have a lot more to do!!!!!

TG the power didn't go out last night. There's no way we would have gotten out to anywhere!

Sunny

Sunday Jan 23rd Check In

Sunday:
4 fruits
4 vegetables
0 flex points No Wiggle Room!
100 minutes of exercise

6:00 Slept until 7:00AM. Back really hurts from shoveling last night
8:00 Wow! Major blizzard. Shoveling for 75 minutes, hardly made a dent! Lite Nouriche, pineapple and watermellon for breakfast (4 pts)
10:00 Loading pics online for friends and family . Thinking of getting in the car and driving to let the snow fall off somewhere other than on my property
12:00 Another 90 minutes of shovel and my back is really feeling it. Just took two Advil. No lunch yet, not hungry! I've got to get Joshua out in the snow, he's been in the house with Sonya the whole time i've been shoveling. Poor kid
2:00 Lunch was a Smart Ones 5pt plus part of a muffin (5 pts to be safe) and an orange (1 pt). No veggies yet today. Dinner will have to be mega salad. Joshua and I got out and played in the snow. He had a blast searching for and digging out trucks in the snow. Our own little archeology dig. Gonna get Sonya out of the house now... She's more of a "take a drive" sorta gal. Probably stop for coffee. Doing good so far... 180 minutes of exercise so far whooo hooo
4:00
6:00
8:00
10:00
midnight to wake

January 24, 2005Thanks everyone.

Just a quick update for now. I am in a very bad mood and don't trust what I might write! Sunday ended badly, MOnday started badly. After over 2 hours to get Joshua to school and me to work, I am parked in east osh kosh, trudged through the snow without boots (that's due to the two hour commute part) and I finally get into work only to learn WW is cancelled for today due to the snow. UUUGGGGGHHHH. We didn't have it last Monday due to the MLKJ holiday. So another week before an official WI.

My car is sounding like the Titanic when it broke in two-- weird metal sounds. My back is in bad shape. I tried to be careful but its really sore. I am in a very bad, bad, bad mood.

Sorry to be so negative.

Sunny


January 25, 2005
Thanks everyone for such kind words!

My back is much better today. I am much better today!!! I was able to get to a local WW center last night and get my WI. I lost .6 lbs. Not earth shattering but in the right direction! It puts me just a hair above what my tickertape still claims

Well now its Tuesday and I am optimistic again. I can now agree with you that the weekend was progress. I think if we didn't have the blizzard I probably would have made it through. I think I was feeling the "somebody needs to take care of me" syndrome and so I took care of myself with food

I have been so busy I haven't read anyone's journal since Sunday. I hope to get by real soon.

Oh, and it looks like we're going to be blessed with a little more snow tomorrow

Sunny

January 26, 2005

Good morning. And its a snowy morning here in Massachusetts. Its beautiful. Driving was treacherous this morning. TOo bad I used all my vacation in October to go to WDW, or I'd be home in my slippers right now

Yesterday I did upperbody weights and abs at lunchtime. Later I came down with a migraine, but refused to take my Zomig until after my cardio workout 'cause it knocks the energy out of me. I went to the gym, dreading my workout-- literally had tears in my eyes. My intention was to leisurely peddle on a recumbent bike but last minute I decided to get on the treadmill. Well, much to my surprise... Treadmill Nirvana!!!! I ran 7.0 miles in 74 minutes (7.7 miles total with cool down). My migraine vanished, I felt wonderful. Of course the migraine came back with a vengeance afterward but I took my Zomig and was fine. I did a little more shoveling last night after to clear out the front a bit. No night-time snacking, food was OP.

I woke up today to more snow. Its amazing how we have lowered our standards around here. I didn't bother to shovel the ~3 inches, just trudge through it. Got to Joshua's daycare and found the same thing! Its kind of gotten to the point of "why bother?". My only confession for this post is that I got on the scale this morning But I was happy to see the number . I'll have to go 'fess up on the "Stay off the Scale" thread.

I guess that's it for now.

Just noticed this one on the smilies menu! Its so cute I just had to use it

Sunny

January 27, 2005

Good morning WISHers!

Gail—Yes I know I was very, very bad!!!! But today is a new day Now I will be good, I promise!

Mel—Thanks! My new “fast” pace is 6.2 mph (9 min 40 sec mile). I am starting to press for 6.4 mph but “fast” is only for short distances! I hope to someday be able to run long distances at a 9 minute mile pace.

Teresa—Look who’s talking! 2 ½ hours of snoeshoing deserves 3 bows!!!!

Beth—I used to just survive with migraines. I have had a prescription for Zomig for about a year now. I can force myself to function for a while with one now because I know the Zomig will knock it out completely. Used to be I’d clear out my day when I felt one coming on. I’m a little irked that it took several years of begging and pleading with my dr to get a script. Mine are hormonal. I get them every month. I used to lose anywhere from 1 to 7 days a month due to migraines. Its funny, they don't seem to hit as hard now. I think the tensing up with dread causes them to get worse. Now I am confident I don't have to suffer, but I don't go ANYWHERE without knowing I have a pill with me!

Doreen—don’t feel bad! I am having more and more difficulty getting to everyone’s journal. There should be no pressure, when you have a chance to stop by and say “hi”, great! When you don’t, I’ll stop by when I get a chance

Sherri—Long distances on the treadmill are very hard. It gets soooooo boring if you aren’t “in the zone”! I listen to music, but it’s a real chore to keep my mix interesting. Music is key!

Wilderness—THanks!!!

Terry—You have the best smilies!!!! That one is definitely a keeper!

Snow update: It stopped! I actually drove on some black streets today. What a treat to feel the full traction between my tires and the road!!!! Most streets are still snow packed but it is very sunny today, albeit 7 deg F. Funny how the body adapts. Its not windy today and 7 deg actually feels, well, comfortable!

Treadmill Nirvana: I think everyone can experience it in some form of exercise. Not everyone gets a runners high, some people are more likely to get “in the zone” cycling, or on the elliptical. Just keep at it. Unfortuneatly, its not something you can “make happen” (or at least I haven’t figured out how), it just seems to happen once in a while. Once it does… you’re hooked!!!!

So far today I am feeling very good and very positive. The weekend is quickly approaching… This one will be more successful than last one. I am DETERMINED!!!!!

Oh, BTW, an update on my GetFit Challenge: We are all a littled miffed that there appears to be a couple of students claiming an AVERAGE of 5 hours of exercise per DAY!!! We think they must be hitting the slopes and just counting the entire time. ANyway, with the skewing, I was ranked 85 of 1248 participants last week and 78 of 1248 participants this week. The ranking is based strictly on minutes exercised not on intensity/quality. Its pretty fun! At large, we are a group of over-achievers and highly competitive. We'll probably exercise ourselves into the grave with this competition!!!!!

Sunny


January 27, 2005
Thanks, guys

Tonight was speed training. I did 6.75 miles in 80 minutes. 30 minutes continuous at 6.2 mph then slow pace and 90 second and 2 minute prints at 6.4 mph and 6.6 mph. No nirvana, but sprinting has a way of passing the time really quickly.

I have to say, I am really enjoying the "smilie explosion" lately

Foods OP, I feel great

Sunny
 
OK, now I'm all caught up, but I have no more time to post "current affairs" :rolleyes:

The Titanic sounding vehicle is no more. I found out last week that it needed over $2,000 in repairs. So I ditched it and now I am the proud new debtor of a 2005 Rav4, 4x4. See if that snow can stop me now
car-smiley-003.gif
(actually its snowing as I speak).

Exercise is going great. I did a 6 miles in 60 minutes treadie run yesterday. Today was mostly concentrating on weights and then some recumbent bike and StairMaster. I've been doing alot of TaeBo lately and really feeling results. :banana: I just love Billy Banks
blinkingblush.gif


Foods on and off. I had a bad eating day last Saturday and then again on Tuesday :rolleyes: Saturday was the day I bought the car. Dx and I spent 11:00AM to 4:30PM at the dealer. Stress and way too hungry set me up for a binge, but luckily Sunday was right back on track. THEN, Tuesday was a sick day. Sick days always end up being eating days, too. Luckily, I don't take too many ::yes::

I have to share the computer with DS. He's waiting to play his hot wheels game, so posting is over for now!!!!!

Sunny
 


Hi Sunny! I love your smilie in the first post! Too cute!

You know what I found out? I love TaeBo too! I've been checking the videos out of the library every once in awhile and it is a great workout! :cool1:

Great job with your exercise and the Treadmill Nirvana! :teeth:

Have a great Friday! :cheer2:
 
YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Welcome Home, Sunny!! I have missed your posts! It's about darn time you got back in here. :teeth:

I can't wait to hear all about your new ride! I hope it handles the snow like a dream!!
 
:sunny: days are here again....

WELCOME BACK!! I've missed you. I know you have been around, but you really can't have a dialogue without your journal.


Congrats on the new car. As usual you are the exercise queen. Keep it up. Someday, I want to be just like you! :rotfl2:

Have a great weekend, and keep us posted.

Beth
 


Hello All

Just back from the gym. I did a leisurely run at 5.2 mph for 40 minutes. What a joy! I haven't done an easy workout for a long time. I'll be back after work for some serious calorie burn ;)

TOM arrived today and today is an official allowable WI :rolleyes: Of course my weight was up but I'm not stressing over it. Monday is the final day of the Stay Off the Scale Challenge, I think I can make it!

Breakfast was Kashi cereal with skim milk and a banana.
Lunch is going to be Smart Ones Lasagna, a red pepper and watermellon.
Dinner is up for grabs as of now.

I need to start working on the "no eating after __ PM" rule again :rolleyes: That one's a real killer for me.

TTFN
Sunny
 
So glad to see your journal is up and running again. I missed you Sunny - ALOT!

I hate having to worry about Big Brother... it's just annoying...
 
Hi :earboy2:

I have been digging through my old laptop and discovered some "before" photos I took last January (2004). Wow! I don't remember being there, but I don't want to ever take for granite where I am now. So, I am posting my Jan '04 Before pictures with some current (Feb '05) "Current" pics. I am just under 30 lbs from goal.

January 2004 ~240 lbs.
January04.jpg
100_2230.jpg


February 2005 ~172 lbs.
feb13_2.jpg
feb13_3.jpg


That's all for now :wave:

Sunny
 
You look great! You have worked so hard!

Your kids must be so proud of you! I know mine say stuff all the time to me!

Keep up your great work and remember those before pix! ;)
 
Wow Sunny- You look fantastic!!!!!!!!

Keep up the great work. I just read through all of your past posts. One thing to remember now that your getting closer to goal. You may want to start experimenting with eating more of your Flex points (or WPA's). I try to use most of mine, although I'm having to teach myself this again this time around. Last time I got to goal keeping my Target points at 22 (should have been 20) and eating ALL of my AP's and most of my flex points each week.

I firmly believe that by teaching our bodies to loose while eating more will keep your metabolism burning at the highest rate possible. If you work out as much as you do, and don't push your body to loose while eating as much as possible, when you go on maintenance, your body will want you to eat a lower set of points to maintain. By pushing it a little higher, you will maximize the amount you can eat and still maintain. It's a learning game though and everyone is different. I find if I don't eat all my flex I stall a little. When I eat my flex points, I find my weight does well. Especially when I have varying days of points. Some days are higher and then some are lower, varied throughout the week. I try not to just split my points out throughout the week (except that is good for confusing your body once in a while). I'll have 2 or 3 low days roughly around my target and then I'll have a few days where I really pump it up closer to 30. It keeps your body guessing.

You may be ok though, because I notice that your AP's are higher. I tend to figure mine based on moderate (not high) intensity and I only base it on my base exercise (not warm up or cool down). On weight days (or FIRM days), I usually knock off time on the tape for warm up and cool down and base it on how I intense the work out felt.

Keep up the fantastic work. You are doing great and look terrific.
 
Wow Sunny!

You look great!!! You should be very proud of all of the hard work that you have put into this weight loss journey. You are doing an awesome job! :cheer2:
 
Wow, Sunny! :sunny: You look great! You must be so proud of all your hard work. What an amazing difference a year has made.
I am really enjoying your journal -- you have a great sense of humor and your treadmill nirvana observation is soo on target!
Congratulations! :teeth:
 
Welcome back Sunny!!!! I have really missed your posts over here in the journals! So wonderful to have you back! :grouphug:

The pics are absolutely amazing! You should be very proud of yourself for taking charge of your life and health and "just doing it!" Keep up the good work - you are SO worth it!

How are the weekends going? I know it was tuff for a while. Any easier yet? I *think* I am doing better there, but the scale hasn't really agreed with me. :guilty:

Have a wonderful Monday!!

TTFN- Sharon :sunny:
 
Hi Everyone,

Thanks for the warm welcome backs:)

Today was a great treadmill run. 5.3 miles in 50 minutes. I had planned on going back after work but DD was having boyfriend trouble so I spent the afternoon with her. It was nice to spend time with her, she doesn't "require" my presence much anymore :rolleyes:

Sharon-- weekends continue to be my hardest part, but I am steadily losing at a slow rate so I'll take it. I just keep working on a better plan. Some day...

Mel-- I totally agree with you about not going too low on food. In fact, I am supposed to be at 22 pts now but it felt too hard so I am doing 24 points, plus I eat my APs and I have been eating my flex. I just have a very hearty appetitie :rolleyes: I can't wait for Spring to get outside and MOVE. The gym is great, videos are great but I really miss the outdoors. Plus my appetite does go down a bit in the nice weather.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone :love:

Sunny
 
Hey Sunny....

It's so great to see you back and I LOVE the before and after pictures :banana: You are such an inspiration to the rest of us that have so much weight to lose.

Hope you had a great Valentine's Day!!
 
Hi, Sunny!!

All I can say is that you are an inspiration! You look great!

Congratulations on all your hard work! :bounce:
 

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