How to turn a romantic, affordable trip for 2 into a ruckus.

"Gee, that's Swell" or "Yes, I'm listening."

Soon hubby returns from the conference and after some texting with the girls, who are now deeply engulfed in magic, asks what our plans are. He's hungry. My plan was to do a monorail resort pub crawl in place of dinner and when Our oldest daughter arrived, she could join us. I knew we'd need time to talk with her. She'd recently had a medical emergency requiring surgery (she's fine now) and she was still upset about the big boyfriend breakup.

I'd researched this pub crawl idea and my plan was to first take the boat to the Wilderness lodge to enjoy the much talked-about beer cheese fondue and, perhaps when we finished there, DD 1 will have arrived and the three of us would continue around the monorail resort lounges sampling appetizers and beverages. Except, suddenly, DH, who just loves for me to prepare a plan (really) doesn't want to go there. "Cheese fondue? No way!" We look at the menu using MDE and nothing looks good to him. He's very picky about food. Everything looks good to me.

"Fine. I announce, "We're going to start at the G Flo." My daughter says I say G Flo instead of Grand Floridian when I'm trying to "be all cool and seem like I'm fluent in Disney." I don't even realize I say it. I think I picked it up on the Dis.

We monorail to the G Flo and, as we enter, I have a bit of asthma which triggers an H Flo. Which is what I call Hot Flashes when I'm trying to be all cool and fluent in being a cranky old b...lady.

We go to that lounge behind the band and get the charcuterie and a shrimp thing- which is on my allergy hot list. Oh well. It's not Dole Whip dangerous. It only makes me cough. So far. These items, while tasty, turn out to be entirely too much salt and, though it's not that crowded, we can't seem to get a second round of drinks. Near death, we finally get out of there and are about to head out to look for water for our powdery throats when we see the monorail is out front. Instead we dash out and hop on. And sit. And wait. And wait. And we are soooo thirsty. I think my husband is eyeballing a kid's sippy cup. It seems there is a medical emergency out near the bus area and Monorail hangs back for that. I'm thinking the guy probably passed out from severe thirst after the charcuterie saltierie platter.

Meanwhile, I become convinced that DD1 will arrive at the CR at any moment and we decide to put the pub crawl on hold until we meet up with her and we head back to the CR when the monorail finally moves.

Once back at the hotel, we lay on the bed just because. The curtains are open and from the bed we see the Electrical Water Pageant heading out to wherever the official start point is. The serpent winks. And no, that's not some dirty reference to empty nester activities. We just waited.

He fell asleep.

I checked my texts:

"New fantasy land is awesome."

"I want to be Ariel. Do you think you have to have red hair?"

"Mom, I'm about an hour away. Got a late start. Sorry"

"I'm in freakin love with the dole whip man."

"K is in love with the Dole Whip man. You should have seen the dole whip he gave her. It was the size of her head. It was gross. "

" jealous much?"

(She does have a huge head, I think, but don't text.)

My awesome nails are chipped. I think about repairing them but doze off instead.

I wake up when my phone rings. DD1 has arrived and is lost in the parking lot. She's a project manager and brilliant engineer. But she's lost in the parking lot.

I wake up DH and we walk outside, toward the lake/waterway behind the garden wing. DH is on the phone with her, directing her to the back parking lot which is just steps from our room. The darkened Electrical Water Pageant, having already performed, no-doubt delighting tens of thousands, cruises dutifully past us. Silent. Smirking.

I silently and secretly called the beloved, whimsical Electrical water pageant a very, very bad name.

At this late hour, DD just wants to get food and sleep. We head up to the Contempo Cafe and order her a meal and we refill our mugs. We listen as well as we can as she tells us details about her surgery and her days of agonizing sickness and of the ex boyfriend who has no time for a girlfriend who has surgery and agony. We listen to tales of co-workers and work projects and apartment maintenance. But the truth is, "under the sea" is going through my head and probably his too and I am only able to digest half of what she's talking about but I'm fully aware that my stomach is only half wanting to digest salty, chewy appetizers. We head back to the room, sipping iced tea, and get DD1 settled in and we borrow her still new-smelling Dodge Challenger which, for some reason, causes my husband to drive like a jerk. We head to the Hess station to buy cases of bottled water and soda. And we each down a bottle of water on the way back. We get ready for bed as we continue to lend sympathetic ears and read texts like, "What are you guys doing?" "We are hungry." "All the food places are closed except for snack places."

At some point, I'm awakened by a phone call. It's 1:30 am.

"The monorail stopped running and we had to walk back and our magic bands won't open the hotel!"

I know what this means. Throughout the week, we'd found that our magic bands only sporadically opened the exterior door to the garden wing which is locked after 11. We are told this is due to us not holding it in place properly. However, even removing a band and holding it in place for several seconds sometimes does not work. I head down the hallway, chugging water from my mug on the way. The girls are still giddy and cheer me up with chatter of crazy photo pass posing on a nearly empty Main Street, the cute Dole Whip guy, Enchanted, late-night Tales with Belle and how great it is to be away from snowy Indiana and wearing flip flops again.

I refill my mug and gulp more water. It may not have been a particularly magical day but as I take it all in and see my daughters hugging their big sister, the suitcases that have regurgitated flip flops, hair straighteners and tank tops all over the floor and my dry-mouthed husband, snoring and sprawled in the middle of our bed, I couldn't be happier.
 
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Well you are just a fantastic writer! I love your sense of humor and I'm a sucker for a happy ending! Keep it coming!
 
We are the palest people at the happiest place on Earth.

Saturday morning, unfortunately, meant another day of the conference for my husband. I'd hoped some of the conference days would be "wink, wink, conference days." However, either conference goers/organizers have more scruples than I believed or my husband just really enjoys sitting in a conference room more than theme park touring with his family.

My plan was to go to Epcot with the girls at about 9, come back to the resort for pool and/or shower and freshening up mid-day and then returning to Epcot with DH in time for fast passes and dinner.

I'm convinced the only reason my daughters began to kinda wake up at 10:30 was because they were hungry. The younger two voluntarily hurried to the Contempo Cafe while DD 1 began to get ready. She's a notoriously, if not painfully, slow primper. I was pretty much ready to go so I redid my nails from a Minnie/Mickey theme to a Cinderella, which, looking back now, makes no sense at all since C doesn't even appear at Epcot at all. Does she?

The girls arrive with mugs of iced tea and a variety of breakfast items and proudly point out that the children's portion of Mickey Waffles is a much better deal than the adult Mickey Waffle entree. I find this ironic since the child's portion of my trip was $2486.92 more expensive than the adult portion. But still, they saved about $1.80 and they take that as a sign that it's going to be a GREAT day!

By the way, that sinfully delicious nectar of the Disney Gods, aka the Bananas Foster sauce for the Mickey Waffles at the contempo, takes the Mickey Waffle experience to a whole new level.

We make it to Epcot around 12:30 and Future World is pretty much deserted. Because we have our fast passes for later, when Dad joins us, we hit the minor attractions, many of which we have not bothered with in a very long time. I am quickly reminded of why.

Between 12:30 and 4- when Dad shows up we enjoyed:

Meeting Pluto and, later, Snow White with almost no wait.

Let me tell ya, that Pluto is bossy. If he indicates that he wants the mom in the photo too, don't try to resist.



We saw/experienced:
Nemo
Crush - I always admire the humor and talent
Journey in Imagination
Had a Mickey ice cream bar for the first time ever
Captain EO
Toured the Butterfly garden
Shopped in Mouse gear for Alex and Ani bracelets
And took about 60 photos with various photo pass photographers who were all over Futureworld and not busy at all.

Looking back at the photos now, it really hits me: White people (at least the ones in my family) from the Midwest are super pale in March and almost look sick or tired or exhausted. Probably from shoveling snow.

Anyway...

We line up for Spaceship Earth with a FP and it quickly goes down. I ask if there is a way to get that FP back because in March you could not get more after yours were used at least as far as I knew. (?) And he gave me an anything/anytime pass. Sweet!

Hubby arrives around 4 and We meet up after way too much texting.

DH: where are you guys?

Me: by the fountain

DH: which fountain?

Me: the squirty one. By the shade sails.

DH: wth is a shade sail?

Me: the big white things.

DH: where are you?

Me: it's hot. We are in the shade by the fountains. K and E went in mouse gear. Did you bring the Raggy?

DH: yep. Where are you.

Me: ok, let's go line up to see Mickey and use Raggy to photo bomb the pic.

DH: Now?

Me: As soon as k gets done buying her bracelet.

DH: Where are you?

Me: Right in front of you. Look up.

DH: Smart ***.
 
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Do you teach creative writing at Purdue? If not, apply - now! When I was there, no one on staff could hold a candle to you! Of course, my sense of humor at that time was a bit less experienced. Not that I'm old or anything. Just sayin'. Write on ...
 
You are my hero.

I'm you (or a wanna-be you) in many, many ways. My children are still home for a few more years. (I'd tell you the exact number of days but that might come across as tacky.)

I am dying to go on a couple's trip....

Ok. Write more. Go ahead...... ;)
 
Totally love your report!
Ah, family vacations... I thought we took our last back in 2008. when DD graduated college and DS joined the Air force. We have gone every year since, still. Just got back from our cruise this year, where I spent top dollar because DD is a teacher and can only go in the summer. And most of the time, the kids went off by themselves............
 
matchmaking at Epcot.

As a family, we line up to greet Mickey and the gang at Epcot. Our plan is to use the Fisher Price Security Bunny to Photobomb our middle daughter. This works quite well as one of us distracts her with conversation while I tell the Character assistant what we are trying to do. All but one seems to enjoy being in on the prank and explains to the photographer that the Dad is going to secretly hold up a bunny for at least one picture.

This was working beautifully and we were all having fun with it. Unfortunately, one of us should have explained to DH what "photo bomb" means because instead of holding it up, behind My daughter's shoulder, he held it at hip level, next to his own hip. This explains the weird glances exchanged by the character assistant and the photographer. I was disappointed when I saw the photos. As the kids would say, "epic fail." They are destined to turn up in the forthcoming book, "Awkward Family Photos, the Disney Edition."

We continue on to Via Napoli for dinner and DGS joins us. You may recall that I think the world of this young man and consider him to be excellent son-in-law material for...someone. Heh heh. He's been very big-brother-like toward my 19 year old through the years. There is just too much of an age gap there. Middle daughter (23) has a very nice long-term boyfriend and we all adore him. What my oldest daughter, 27 doesn't realize is that they are extremely compatible. Oddly, I seem to be the only one aware of this. Or maybe not...

I found it a little fishy when the host took us to our table and four of the six members of our party arrived at the table well ahead of the other two who were slowly walking and chatting. And smiling. The four at the table, with no verbal cues, whatsoever, quickly seated themselves, leaving two adjacent seats free. Hm. Wasn't that handy? Did I detect a few knowing glances exchanged? Furthermore, were the other three early table arrivals studying our groups' facial expressions, looking for hints of "are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

Or maybe they were all just very hungry. The other two diners seated themselves, never pausing in conversation and barely aware of the rest of us. And we were loving it.

Our excellent waiter had appetizers and wine to the table in no time at all and helped us select pizzas to share. This was our first time at Via Napoli and we all agreed the pizza was very good.

DD and DGS talked and talked and talked. The rest of us encouraged it. It was ridiculously obvious. Shame on us. Hee hee.

After dinner, we split into two groups, those who wanted to rush off to Mission Space with the anytime fast pass and those that wanted to stroll through World Showcase. Unfortunately, thus split our couple up but it was unavoidable since Dd1 was still recovering from surgery and had to move at a relaxed pace.

Team-fast-pace took the security bunny and did some photo pass photos with it as they moved about, taking in the big 3 Futureworld attractions.

I was in the World Showcase group and we had a great time investigating and shopping. I didn't buy anything except for a few salted caramels as recommended on the Dis...somewhere. They were, by the way, wonderful, as promised.

We all met back up after illuminations as we headed for the monorail, stopping for a group photo on the way out.



Notice Dd1 and DGS next to each other in the photo.

As we were on the mono, the "kids" start making plans to head to a lounge. I suggest they go to the poly and check out the fireworks from the beach. They are all over that idea and they all exit the mono at the poly, leaving us old folks with assorted jackets, sunglasses and international goodies to schlep back to the room. And schlep we do, just in time to miss the Stupid water pageant thing AGAIN.

Not even joking.

Exhausted, DH and I shower and get ready for bed and tidy up the room a bit. DH decides to hide the new security bunny under Dd2's pillow with the old ones. I felt he was missing the point, as I wanted to come up with some funny things to do with it but I was too tired to argue. And, surprise! The two younger girls are back at the room having decided to "wink wink" leave Dd and Ggs alone together to see if any chemistry kicks in. They even admit it was awkward when they pretended to be tired and said they were leaving. They gossip a bit about whether or not there is any attraction. I think there is but the others are less convinced and less interested but not sure.

Soon Dd2 finds the Raggy under her pillow and is delighted, embarrassed, amused and confused. She has a sheepish grin and immediately texts her boyfriend to tell him about our half-baked prank and non-photo bomb photo bombs.



It was fun but not as fun as I'd hoped.

DD 1 returns to the room TWO HOURS later and we all want details (except DH who is noisily slumbering away) but she has little to say.

"Any chemistry there?" I want to know.

"Eh. He's super nice."

"Like, nice nice or just nice?"

"Just nice."

"Any connection?" Asks DD 3.

"Mmmmm. I don't know. I guess. Not. Maybe. I don't know."

I hear "yes"

But actually, that's the end, as far as I know. They texted some and maybe still do. He asked DH how she was doing a couple times. But the fact is, they live in different states and no matter how much they have in common, it's not going anywhere.

I just texted her and asked if they were still in touch.

"No."

So, that's the end of that. Anti-climactic, huh? That's real life for ya. This ain't no Disney movie.
 
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No!! I want those two together too! It's going to happen...trust me! pixiedust:


He's going to graduate in August and has multiple job offers so I'm going to have to get the pixie dust in the air pretty fast. Ah... if only kids listened to their parents. Haha.

By the way- thanks, everyone, for the kind words and positive comments on the report. And thanks for reading. I know it's not as easy to follow or as fun as the ones with lots of gorgeous photos and links. I'm just not that Dis-savvy. Xo
 
Yes, that last post was a bit of a let down. I did think there was a little spark there but timing is everything.

After I texted her last night and asked if they were still in touch she said "no." But this morning she said "why do you ask?" I will report back if there is any news.

So, to get back into a more magical vibe, how about some cupcakes?

Throughout the trip, the girls and I were working on our informal cupcake crawl. We decided that every time we saw a great-looking cupcake, (like there is any other kind) we would buy one and share it and then cross it off the list that we'd found on line. I think we made it through about 10 monstrously huge cupcakes before we were ready for cupcake rehab.

The truth is, there are simply more cupcakes on property than anyone or even any small group should ever attempt in a single trip. I know, I know, I could possibly be banned for life from Disney food blogs and food porn threads for uttering unmagical baked goods blasphemy. Therefore, I vow to make additional WDW trips until such time that I've devoured at least one of, or a portion of, every cupcake variety. And I encourage each of you to do the same. (Spoiler alert: I already went back in June)

We all agreed that our favorite was the Strawberry Cheesecake one from BOG.

And the free cupcakes the girls snagged were tasty too! One late evening, just before the contempo cafe closed, D2&3 rushed over to get some food and, wanting Mac & cheese, ordered 2 meals from the children's menu and one other item.

The food took an exceptionally long time to prepare. The CM mentioned that there was mishap. And he said he felt so bad about making "the little ones wait for their food" that he have them three free cupcakes to make up for it. The girls confessed, "it's ok, the Mac and Cheese is for us." He said, "then I guess you'd better save room for the cupcakes too."

So, they were pretty excited when they returned and they cut up and sampled the cupcakes. I had a piece of a Strawberry Lemonade one and it was my second favorite one of the trip! I didn't try the other two.

Disney cupcake crawling has a place of honor on my personal list of WDW must-dos.


 
He's going to graduate in August and has multiple job offers so I'm going to have to get the pixie dust in the air pretty fast. Ah... if only kids listened to their parents. Haha.

By the way- thanks, everyone, for the kind words and positive comments on the report. And thanks for reading. I know it's not as easy to follow or as fun as the ones with lots of gorgeous photos and links. I'm just not that Dis-savvy. Xo

I for one much prefer a good story over pics we have all seen a million times. Thanks for giving us a great one!
 
"Tip: If they ever tell you that they have a special quiet table for you that they think you will like---that's code for you're getting crappy table in the little weird room with no view."

Haha! We got that room too!
 
I know, right?????

Ok - in a few days, you might need to check out my TR (don't worry, it's not as popular as yours so it won't be hard to find the melted cupcake...) When my DD was in the ER and my son and I went to BOG by ourselves, we saved the Master's Cupcake for her! So gorgeous UNTIL it melts in the sun. Just saying...

I'm going to have a before and after picture of it.

But she said it was still delicious when she got back to the resort. :)
 
I know, right????? Ok - in a few days, you might need to check out my TR (don't worry, it's not as popular as yours so it won't be hard to find the melted cupcake...) When my DD was in the ER and my son and I went to BOG by ourselves, we saved the Master's Cupcake for her! So gorgeous UNTIL it melts in the sun. Just saying... I'm going to have a before and after picture of it. But she said it was still delicious when she got back to the resort. :)

Try the melted grey stuff. It's delicious!

Sorry to hear about the ER visit. I'll check out your TR!
 
Personnally, I don't mind the lack of photos, because it more than makes up in funny-ness! :goodvibes

:flower3:
 
Loving this - you are hilarious! The thing about the serpent winking not being an empty nester activity had me actually laughing out loud :rotfl:
 

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