Promposals....

[okeydokey]

Yes I think they are silly. Everything has to be "for show" now and posted on social media. Following promposals are elaborate public wedding proposals and gender reveals.

 

[cabanafrau]

OH NOOOOOOO



I just think it's something overblown and has no real purpose. It seems like a case of oneupmanship and sets people up to feel bad if they don't get one as great as their friends.

I'm sure they could be.

IMO my daughter's will just be nice memories to look back on those days. Seriously, we're talking she worked up a poster board where she formulated a periodic table in such a way to ask him to prom because they met on Science Olympiad team. She did use more than one color of marker, but the poster board was white, so I don't know how that measures out for elaborateness or over the top. I guess if you compare it against what someone posted upthread about a note on a locker asking prom?, it qualifies as OTT, although it was seen by less people than it would have been in a school halway. It was fun to them because it was meaningful to where they met. She presented it to him between events in a classroom when she was at one end with the boyfriend and the teachers were sitting at the other end. The teachers noticed what was going on and went bananas over it. End of promposal hoopla.

I knew about it only because she mentioned what she was planning to do & I saw her posterboard when it was finished. Friends and family did ask during the leadup to prom about a promposal because it's kind of an expectation anymore, but other than the friends she talked about it with at school and the teachers who knew because the teachers who were present took pictures and texted their colleagues, I don't know how it could have been hurtful, offensive or even bothersome to much of anyone.

Serving no real purpose? That's the measure by which everything in life should be evaluated? Heaven forbid teenagers having a bit of harmless fun become a thing. We didn't do it in my day, so it's not necessary.

 

[Hikergirl]

I don't get them, I don't think they are needed, but they are harmless fun things for kids to do. My dd has had 2, nothing over the top, just a sign taken out at a surprise moment. I haven't heard of any crazy over the top ones around here but have seen some crazy ones online.
Just saw one today where the kid dressed like a Ken doll. He was pretty muscular so I'm sure it was more about showing his abs than asking someone to the prom though.

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

Do these seem like the most ridiculous things to anyone else?

Yes. When I first heard of it, I couldn't believe it. Just ask the person.

There is a rule in our High School that it's not allowed anymore because it got out of control. One boy used shaving cream along a group of lockers to ask the girl. He did it before school started for the day. Needless to say, he had to clean it up and the school immediately did the rule of elaborate asking of people to any dance is no longer being allowed. Basically if they want to do something fancy it has to be outside of school grounds.
I'm sure the school was thankful he didn't use spray paint.

 

[sam_gordon]

I don't see a problem with them. It's the "it must be shared on social media" (along with every other little thing) that's the problem.

 

[penn19]

Not particularly, no. I actually think they're kind of cute. It's good to see kids putting in some effort. If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing, I always say.

In theory that sounds good. Except if the boy isn't creative or just isn't into it. Then the girl says no because her friends ridicule her because the boy just asked and didn't make it a production.

 

[Katy Belle]

I don't have a problem with them. My boys have done them, and received them. None have been elaborate. Some have been private, some have been public. I just view it as a little bit of fun.

I do think it makes it harder to say no, which does bother me.

 

[PollyannaMom]

Do these seem like the most ridiculous things to anyone else?

Yes, yes, and yes!

I figure it's hard enough at that age just to ask someone out. Having to also make it creative or elaborative or whatever (and potentially public or shared on social media) is just too much pressure in my opinion.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

Yes. When I first heard of it, I couldn't believe it. Just ask the person.

There is a rule in our High School that it's not allowed anymore because it got out of control. One boy used shaving cream along a group of lockers to ask the girl. He did it before school started for the day. Needless to say, he had to clean it up and the school immediately did the rule of elaborate asking of people to any dance is no longer being allowed. Basically if they want to do something fancy it has to be outside of school grounds.
I'm sure the school was thankful he didn't use spray paint.

And I bet they stop once they aren't allowed in school. I mean who's going to be there to witness it or record it and post it on Snapchat.

 

[mummabear]

Do these seem like the most ridiculous things to anyone else?

Yes I think they are crazy.
I just wonder what these kids will expect when they are being proposed to now, well if my promposal involved a sky writer then.....

 

[DisneyOma]

Not particularly, no. I actually think they're kind of cute. It's good to see kids putting in some effort. If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing, I always say.

Oh god. Stay away from me.

 

[mjkacmom]

Yes I think they are crazy.
I just wonder what these kids will expect when they are being proposed to now, well if my promposal involved a sky writer then.....

I was sitting at a baseball game a few years ago, and there was a biplane circling above, with a banner saying "it's a boy!"

 

[kmb584]

I find most of them bizarre. Some of them can put a wedding proposal to shame.

When I graduated from high school (not that long ago -- 2002), promposals weren't a "thing". And when my daughter enters her junior/senior year of high school (2027/28) I hope they aren't a "thing" then either. Then again, it may be something just as or even more outrageous when it comes to asking someone to prom.

 

[Snap Crackle Pop]

I don't really see what the big deal is, it doesn't effect you. Let them live.

 

[mamacatnv]

I personally think they are silly BUT if its a thing, then its a thing. My DD has no desire to go to prom, I have no idea if Promposals are a thing here or not.
I do agree it puts more pressure to say yes

 

[Cinderella94]

Beyond ridiculous.

 

[Mizzoufan]

It seems like to me they are to much stress for kids.

 

[jiminyC_fan]

I agree. Too much stress. It's not like a marriage proposal Its' a dance. Will the student be disappointed when the promposal ended up better than the actual wedding proposal? To me there is so much over the top these days.

 

[BrinkofSunshine]

If anyone isn't interested, there was recently an episode of NPR's This American Life that has a story on prompsals in one school: https://m.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/610/grand-gesture

It gave it such a positive spin I'm actually pretty jealous this wasn't a thing when I was in HS! They all sounded like they have a bunch of fun with it. I don't understand how something so harmless is bothersome to people.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

It doesn't leave much for a person to be excited about. Could you imagine if your marriage proposal doesn't measure up to, or exceed your prom proposal?