The cost of Covid

[mshanson3121]

This has nothing to do with Disney, I just needed to rage for a moment. My uncle died this morning (cancer, not Covid)... and here we are, family members all over, none of us - his brothers, sisters, his own mother, nieces and nephews, friends who loved him dearly, none were able to travel to say goodbye beforehand, and now a funeral not even allowed outside of his wife and two children. At a time when we want (need even) to be together, to hug, to see and support each other...and to be so damn stuck. It's just hard. I'm sorry, I just needed to vent somewhere. But to me, this is one of the costs of Covid - everyone who loses someone they love, facing these situations, forcing people to die alone in hospitals, forcing our elderly loved ones to be stuck alone in nursing homes... it's just all heart breaking.

 

[mommasita]

It is so heartbreaking. I am sorry for the loss of your uncle, and so so sorry your family can not come together physically to support each Other.

 

[marchingstar]

I’m sorry for your loss and for the pain of grieving alone <3

I hope your family can find a way to grieve together, without being together.

 

[bababear_50]

Hi Hon
I am so sorry you are going through this without the ones you need the most with you. Hang tight to the ones you do have close by and give yourself time.
You and your family are in my thoughts.
Bless you
Hugs
Mel

 

[Where's Wall-E]

My thoughts are with you and your family, and I hope you can find a way to "come together" at your time of need, without physically being together. Can you Skype? Facetime? Just to have a good cry and chat.

I chose not to attend a beloved colleague's memorial 2 weeks ago because I knew it would be well over 50 people in the room and I was uncomfortable with that. The choices we're having to make because of COVID-19 are heartbreaking.

 

[alohamom]

I am so sorry for your loss.
We lost an Uncle to cancer in December and I know that coming together to grieve helped my young adult children cope with one of their first big losses of a family member.
One thing we as a family have planned is to have a memorial celebration for him in the mid summer where we will all help dig and plant a tree in his name.
Maybe you can suggest something like this in the coming days so that it feels like everyone comes together to help organize it, or something else along those lines.

 

[mshanson3121]

I am so sorry for your loss.
We lost an Uncle to cancer in December and I know that coming together to grieve helped my young adult children cope with one of their first big losses of a family member.
One thing we as a family have planned is to have a memorial celebration for him in the mid summer where we will all help dig and plant a tree in his name.
Maybe you can suggest something like this in the coming days so that it feels like everyone comes together to help organize it, or something else along those lines.

Thank you (and all the others). I ache and mourn. I loved him and have so many great memories. But, he suffered, painfully, for a long time, and so... I'm glad he's not suffering anymore. But, still... You know.

I think there is going to be a memorial, hopefully this summer (whenever life resumes normalcy) at their cottage. He loved the water and loved the cottage. It's fitting.

 

[AngelDisney]

My deepest condolences on the passing of your uncle. My heart goes out to you and your family in this time of sorrow, and you are in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Madame]

I am so sorry for your loss

 

[Donald - my hero]

No 2 ways about it, THIS JUST SUCKS! You deserve to rant, to get angry, to want to kick back at something. Cancer is an evil beast at the best of times and now you've been robbed of the vital part of process, the ability to say goodbye on your terms and to comfort each other in such an intimate fashion.

I echo the comments & suggestions of others to try and find ways to connect with each other thru technology for the immediate support you'll all be craving and to plan something that will allow you to celebrate your uncle's life in person when it's possible. Be gentle with yourself as you navigate this time of sorrow and know that we're thinking of you.

 

[Sue M]

My condolences to you and your family.

 

[isabellea]

My sincere sympathies. So sorry for your loss.

 

[choirfarm]

It does stink. So sorry!!!

 

[mort1331]

Very sorry for your loss.
I will point out that I am a funeral director in the Toronto area.
We have had huge changes to how things are going, and changing daily.
We now have no services in churches, our funeral home, just at the cemetery. We can have no more than 20 at the service, and that includes our staff.
Arrangements are limited to 2 people in the room, and most are over the phone. For something that is so personal, we have had to detach from all. Caskets are closed, no ID.
So when it hits home like yours, it is tough for all to understand.
I want you to know, we on this end, we hurt for you to, this is not why we got into the profession.

 

[Starwind]

My condolences on your loss.

 

[momof2gr8kids]

I'm very sorry for your loss. Hopefully things will be back to "normal" by the summer and your family can come together at the cottage.

I had a friend return from a trip to find her mom at end stages of life. She's in a nursing home and has been sick for years, so that wasn't a shock, but because they were all in self isolation for 14 days they weren't able to be with her. I know the staff have been great and it was a comfort knowing a couple of other close relatives were able to be with her in the end, but I know it's heartbreaking for her not to have been able to be there, after she's been her main caregiver for 10 years. This sucks all around.

 

[Tinkershelly]

I'm so sorry for your loss, and sorry for the situation. Isolation and social distancing has hit us all in ways we might not have been able to predict a few weeks ago. I hope it will resolve soon, the isolation has been tough on everyone

 

[Camilo]

I'm very sorry for your loss.

What you're facing now sucks and is something that immigrants face on a daily basis.

In other cultures (like mine, Brazilian), people are buried 24 hours (36 at the latest) after passing away. It's different from Canada, where it can be a week until the funeral/viewing/burial).

We're always afraid of not being able to go back home in time if something like this happens (it has happened when my grandmother passed away, I couldn't make it back home). I was "lucky" to be there on the last days my mom was battling cancer.

It sure sucks....

My condolences.