Any tips for an impatient tween?

[Arielfan98]

Just before our 2 week trips to WDW, he usually wants to binge watch Disney films and that peaks his interest enough for him to want to take pictures with some characters. My family recently had a trip to WDW in November without me and apparently he’s open to trying all the rides now so I suppose that gives us more ground to work with !

Try something new and exciting on this trip then? Like I know I'd be super pumped if I found out if my family was doing the special Africa Trek tour.

 

[bell_ed28]

OP - I am assuming you are a teenage girl/young woman... sorry if I'm wrong. But I am going to play devil's advocate and rewrite your post from the perspective of your brother...

Hi all,

my DF and I began taking annual trips to DW in 2013, problem is that lately I think the magic has began to fade for my big sister. She's at that age (teenager) where all she wants to do is shop and eat at fancy restaurants. My brothers and father and I are interested in riding all the cool rides! Sadly my sister and mother do not share that same interest but at least they tag along and keep the complaining to a minimum.

With our 2018 trip coming up in October, it looks to be the last for a while and I want my big sister to enjoy it fully. Any tips to pry her away from the shops and restaurants to experience more of the parks? I'm perfectly fine with her sticking to the things she enjoys (everybody loves Chef Mickey's) but seeing her get deflated each time someone mentions Splash Mountain makes me feel as though she's maybe not getting the most out of these memories.

I understand where you're coming from. It would be great if everyone in the family loved the same things, or at least happily went along and didn't mope about it. But if he's been to Disney every year since he was a toddler, it's natural for the magic to begin to "fade". I have a 12 year old son. This March will be our third trip to Disney and he has things he can't wait to do, and things he has no interest in. He has ridden Tomorrowland Speedway with his Dad while his little sisters and I met princesses. He has done Agent P missions in Epcot while his little sisters and I ... met princesses. The girls are over meeting princesses now, but we will still split up sometimes, and I think that's fine.

On the other hand, there are going to be times when he has to do things he doesn't want to. That's just part of being a (relatively large) family. Sometimes he's going to just have to suck it up. You can't worry about helping him make the most of his memories. Let your parents worry about his attitude, and just focus on your own fun.

As for the Halloween party... totally up to him if he wants to dress up. My son would happily dress as a character from Star Wars, but that may not be typical for his age. The party is fun for everyone, though. You don't have to do the "trick or treat trail". You can just hit the stations as you're passing by if the lines don't look too long. You do get a LOT of candy.

I never thought of it from his perspective so that’s really but things into view...

I think I was most concerned about him being able to try everything because my parents can be very strict at times so splitting up to do the things we all want isn’t always an option. He can get grumpy about it but so can everybody. I think I ought to try and be more involved in what he knows he wants to do rather than trying to convince him to watch this show or wait for the fireworks etc.

Thanks

 

[bell_ed28]

As others have mentioned, split up. Also, you might have your parents look into a at Universal - maybe for all of you or maybe just for the "boys". They have a lot more rides that tweens / teenagers enjoy.

At 9, my DS really loved that we did some special experiences with just him and an adult. My DH took him on a fishing excursion (fishing in Epcot, so cool!), and I did the Star Wars dessert party with him.

I also made sure he had some input in the restaurants.

But I echo the PP in splitting up the party. If they like to ride Splash Mountain, then let them ride Splash Mountain

Splash mountain is a must for my family anyway. I was concerned about him not trying different things because the last time we went he limited himself to what rides he’d go on (if he didn’t know the film, he didn’t want to go on the ride. If the ride looked scary, he’d insist on waiting outside with mum and that would obviously keep her from enjoying the ride) so I thought it could be a more enjoyable experience if he waited to watch a parade or a fireworks show at least, just more things for him to do. I would never force him to do something that scared him. But now it looks like he isn’t scared of certain rides anymore so as long as we can convince my mum to not worry so much, splitting up looks to be the go-to plan. Thanks for the tip about restaurants (he generally doesn’t seem interested but it wouldn’t hurt to ask if he wants to go anywhere in particular) I think even asking if he wants to try any new snacks would work too

 

[bell_ed28]

My boys were pretty much done with Disney by that age, especially since they had been and done it before. They rode what they wanted and didn't bother with the things they weren't interested in.
I think trying to force someone to have the memories you want them to have isn't really the way to go. If it were me, I'd let him do the ride he wants, and sit out the ones he doesn't.
Does he want a costume for MNSSHP? When my boys were young they were OK with just wearing a Disney themed Tee and Mickey ears to the party. By 11 they weren't even willing to wear any Disney apparel. Make sure he is OK with whatever your plan for him is, and have him pick out what he wants to wear.

Why can't you split up for the things only some people want to do? Those who don't want to watch Nemo can ride Everest or whatever and meet up when you're done. My oldest ds hasn't wanted anything to do with characters since 12 or so, and we don't force it. Character meals are too expensive to take someone who doesn't want to be there (as long as another adult is ok skipping it).

I have 14 and 10 year old boys. While they like to souvie shop some when at Disney that's certainly not their main focus and they would lose interest fast. And, honestly, in all our Disney trips we've never watched Nemo. Everyone has different things they want to do when there and you can't force him to do things you think are cool for memories unless you want him to remember hating that trip.
I would say it's a hard no on a costume - or would be for my boys. But they would probably wear a Halloween shirt.

I didn’t word this correctly...I do not want to force him to do anything. If he wants to go on a ride or something we make that the priority because he is the youngest in our group. The difficulty comes from his mood shifting whenever it comes to doing something he does not want to do. As a family on holiday in a different country, it’s not so easy to just split up. I mean we have tried it but it causes arguments and dampens the atmosphere (being late to meet up at designated times, regrouping and someone is noticeably gloomy or upset and we won’t know why it happened or what happened, missing reservations or cancelling dining plans last minute, etc) my mum is strict and worries a lot about the youngest whereas my dad is very laidback and thinks he ought to be able to go off on his own if he wants to. I’d like to get him interested in things other than what he is used to because he shuts them down before he has even tried them. But again, I can’t force him and I don’t want to. I was just concerned because I know if I were him, later on I’d regret not trying some new things.


The first time we attended MNSSHP he dressed as batman, we picked up a costume at Walmart but didn’t really get around the whole of the trick or treat trail, only a couple of barrels around Frontierland (he was 7 at the time) I’ll ask if he wants to dress up, just in case he might, but otherwise a Halloween shirt sounds like a solid idea.

Thank you!

 

[ajwolfe]

I understand now completely what you are trying to do and I appreciate the fact that you are wanting to make this trip wonderful for your whole family!! I'll be the lone voice that says we don't really split up in the parks - unless we are with other families. As a family we take turns doing things that we like on vacations and that requires everyone to be patient and cool when it's not their turn. Heck even some of our weekend trips are geared more towards one family member than other but then it all balances out in the next trip.

How about a hidden mickey book to look at while he's waiting on rides he might not like or while you all are shopping?

 

[bell_ed28]

I understand now completely what you are trying to do and I appreciate the fact that you are wanting to make this trip wonderful for your whole family!! I'll be the lone voice that says we don't really split up in the parks - unless we are with other families. As a family we take turns doing things that we like on vacations and that requires everyone to be patient and cool when it's not their turn. Heck even some of our weekend trips are geared more towards one family member than other but then it all balances out in the next trip.

How about a hidden mickey book to look at while he's waiting on rides he might not like or while you all are shopping?

That actually sounds like a great idea; he has mentioned the hidden mickeys around the parks before and I think he had even tried to find some of them. If he is interested in doing this I think another activity could be the ratatouille hide and squeak hunt in epcot, too (that is if it is still available)! He does get competitive so it might give him some incentive. Has anyone tried the sorcerers of the magic kingdom? I was interested in trying it myself this next trip and figured it might be something my brother and I can do together.

Thanks for understanding, it gets difficult on long holidays, especially with a big family. Not everyone is going to have the same interests so it would be an absolute DREAM if we could work out an itinerary that didn't have to constantly be edited lol

 

[kj2mom]

You have gotten some great tips so I will just add that when we went to MNSSHP we all went as different players from the different teams from home. We live just outside of Boston so one was a Bruin, one was a Celtic, one was a Patriot etc etc etc. It was a huge conversation starter! Probably not quite the same effect as the Mickey baseball team but still so fun! It was football season and the Patriot player my friend was had just broken his arm the week before so people would come up and ask how the arm was healing. Very fun!

I won't repeat all the others so will just end with, relax have fun and enjoy your trip!

 

[Hikergirl]

I get what you are trying to do but honesty if you have been taking annual trips since 2013 it really shouldn't be too hard to split up. NOt really sure what being from another country has to do with that.
If he has been before he probably knows what he likes, I mean if he did have any regrets from the last trips wouldn't he want to try new things on each one? You may regret things, but that doesn't mean he will/does.
If it were me (as mom) I'd lay down some rules and let the family split up from time to time, but that is just me.

 

[bell_ed28]

I get what you are trying to do but honesty if you have been taking annual trips since 2013 it really shouldn't be too hard to split up. NOt really sure what being from another country has to do with that.
If he has been before he probably knows what he likes, I mean if he did have any regrets from the last trips wouldn't he want to try new things on each one? You may regret things, but that doesn't mean he will/does.
If it were me (as mom) I'd lay down some rules and let the family split up from time to time, but that is just me.

not to get too personal, but 3 of the 4 children going (including myself) have some kind of ailment. My youngest brother has asthma and a tendency to overheat. My other 2 brothers are not very reliable when it comes to taking responsibility so my mum would have to rely on my dad to keep an eye on the youngest and make sure he was taking breaks if he needed them. This is partly why we do not split up as easily as other families would in the parks. We've had instances where we've "lost" each other on holiday before and it's a case of still not being entirely familiar with the parks yet. As I've said my mum worries often, she focuses on the worst case scenario a lot of the time so regardless of how well secured the parks are, she'll be thinking about whether or not there will be someone armed inside the park, how crowded it is and how easy that could make it for a stranger to lead the youngest away or even for the youngest to get lost himself. Even worries about getting into an accident: what would we need to do, would first aid be enough, would we have to leave the premises and go to a hospital, will insurance cover it? I understand this all sounds irrational and whatnot to some but they're her children and she has every right to be concerned for their safety. If it puts her mind at ease I'd rather she insist we stay together as a group than resort to child reins or some kind of gps tracker.

 

[mjkacmom]

not to get too personal, but 3 of the 4 children going (including myself) have some kind of ailment. My youngest brother has asthma and a tendency to overheat. My other 2 brothers are not very reliable when it comes to taking responsibility so my mum would have to rely on my dad to keep an eye on the youngest and make sure he was taking breaks if he needed them. This is partly why we do not split up as easily as other families would in the parks. We've had instances where we've "lost" each other on holiday before and it's a case of still not being entirely familiar with the parks yet. As I've said my mum worries often, she focuses on the worst case scenario a lot of the time so regardless of how well secured the parks are, she'll be thinking about whether or not there will be someone armed inside the park, how crowded it is and how easy that could make it for a stranger to lead the youngest away or even for the youngest to get lost himself. Even worries about getting into an accident: what would we need to do, would first aid be enough, would we have to leave the premises and go to a hospital, will insurance cover it? I understand this all sounds irrational and whatnot to some but they're her children and she has every right to be concerned for their safety. If it puts her mind at ease I'd rather she insist we stay together as a group than resort to child reins or some kind of gps tracker.

So you don’t want to split up because it would be too much of a burden for you dad to care for his 11 year old son? He’s 11, doesn’t he go off with friends, ride bikes, play sports? No one has ever been killed or kidnapped from a Disney park, I’m a mom to 5, I worry, but over real issues, not an 11 year old with his dad. Oh, and my twins had asthma, ds15 was taken by ambulance to the hospital when he was 11 from a baseball game (I wasn’t there, his older brother was there, but the commotion happened in the dugout, and my son was oblivious). The coach called me, I met him at the hospital, it was fine.

 

[bell_ed28]

So you don’t want to split up because it would be too much of a burden for you dad to care for his 11 year old son? He’s 11, doesn’t he go off with friends, ride bikes, play sports? No one has ever been killed or kidnapped from a Disney park, I’m a mom to 5, I worry, but over real issues, not an 11 year old with his dad. Oh, and my twins had asthma, ds15 was taken by ambulance to the hospital when he was 11 from a baseball game (I wasn’t there, his older brother was there, but the commotion happened in the dugout, and my son was oblivious). The coach called me, I met him at the hospital, it was fine.

I’m sorry but I find this quite rude. I’m not going to go into detail about past instances that have led my parents to being weary and worrying over the general well-being of their children’s safety. I chose not to specify information I deemed too personal and instead of acknowledging that you’re making assumptions rather than simply accepting that we are likely not going to split up and that we have our own reasons as to why. I asked for some help to make this holiday more enjoyable in general and I’ve taken the advice and tips given on board but this just doesn’t seem one bit constructive. Just judgemental.

Thank you for taking the time out though

 

[mjkacmom]

I’m sorry but I find this quite rude. I’m not going to go into detail about past instances that have led my parents to being weary and worrying over the general well-being of their children’s safety. I chose not to specify information I deemed too personal and instead of acknowledging that you’re making assumptions rather than simply accepting that we are likely not going to split up and that we have our own reasons as to why. I asked for some help to make this holiday more enjoyable in general and I’ve taken the advice and tips given on board but this just doesn’t seem one bit constructive. Just judgemental.

Thank you for taking the time out though

I’m not trying to be rude, sometimes it’s hard to give advice when details have been omitted. If you need to stay together, I’d side with mostly what the guys want to do, and avoid the shopping. I would say that a majority of guests would rather ride attract than muck around in gift shops, especially young men.

 

[lanejudy]

The family dynamic is what it is. Maybe you could speak with your father about splitting up, but if he sticks by your mother and her worries then it's best for you to let that be.

How about you and mom shop on Main Street... while the boys "shop" at Casey's or Main Street Bakery? I've never known a teen or tween boy to pass up an opportunity for a snack. You'll all be in the same general area. Maybe they could even sit outside with their snacks; mom can pop out of the shops and see them.

I suggest everybody gets to pick 1 thing they really want to do each day and the rest of the family has to politely tolerate it. For you that may be 15-30 minutes to pop into a shop; for your brother, it may be another turn at Splash Mountain with a 45 minute standby; maybe mom wants Carousel of Progress and Dad chooses Space Mountain, while another brother picks lunch at Pinocchio's and another likes the fireworks. It's part of being a family - accepting and tolerating each other's differences. The trip should include the things that are special to each individual; everyone won't have the same exact special memories of the trip, but everyone will have a shared special memory of the trip itself. I would plan each day to include 1 top interest from each family member - and go from there.

Enjoy your vacation!

 

[DisneyChris2016]

OK, I understand the situation a lot better now and I think you're very sweet for being so concerned about your little brother and trying to balance all of the restrictions you have to work with and still make sure his trip is great. I understand being a protective parent (and older sibling - my brother is 9 years younger than me), and if splitting up doesn't work for your family, it doesn't work. No one is going to have a good trip if your mother is stressed all the time worrying about someone.

Sorcerer's of the Magic Kingdom is fun... my son loves it. He started on our first trip when he was 8, and he was really looking forward to getting back to it on our second trip (he had just turned 11). This trip, he'll be 12 and he is absolutely planning to bring all of his cards and use it as a fill-in activity when we have time between FP+, etc. I think it's great that you want to do it with him (sounds like your mother is OK with the two of you going off alone together?) It's a good way to kill time. The only problem is that the game directs you where to go, so it may not always be convenient to the area where the rest of the family is. But I would definitely recommend giving it a try (it's free, after all - you've got nothing to lose.) Also, if you do end up going to the Halloween party, be sure to pick up the special edition card that they have (only available to party goers during the parties). Good luck!

 

[smiths02]

OK, I understand the situation a lot better now and I think you're very sweet for being so concerned about your little brother and trying to balance all of the restrictions you have to work with and still make sure his trip is great. I understand being a protective parent (and older sibling - my brother is 9 years younger than me), and if splitting up doesn't work for your family, it doesn't work. No one is going to have a good trip if your mother is stressed all the time worrying about someone.

Sorcerer's of the Magic Kingdom is fun... my son loves it. He started on our first trip when he was 8, and he was really looking forward to getting back to it on our second trip (he had just turned 11). This trip, he'll be 12 and he is absolutely planning to bring all of his cards and use it as a fill-in activity when we have time between FP+, etc. I think it's great that you want to do it with him (sounds like your mother is OK with the two of you going off alone together?) It's a good way to kill time. The only problem is that the game directs you where to go, so it may not always be convenient to the area where the rest of the family is. But I would definitely recommend giving it a try (it's free, after all - you've got nothing to lose.) Also, if you do end up going to the Halloween party, be sure to pick up the special edition card that they have (only available to party goers during the parties). Good luck!

I was just going to say that Sorcerers of the Magic Kingdom might be fun.

I wanted to also add that I don't think he is alone. We went to a local production of Beauty and the Beast (me, DH, 11 year old son, 5 year old son, 5 year old daughter). Everyone agreed it would be a nice thing to do beforehand. Anyhow, at intermission, I could tell the boys just weren't into it. So I told them to go home and pick us up later (we live 5 minutes from the theater). So I understand splitting up sometimes. I also understand that some people will just never like some things. (I still hate it that DH watches every football game. Bores me to tears.)

However, we didn't split up much at Disneyworld last time we were there (we had one night when I took my older son to the Star Wars Dessert Party and the rest stayed at the hotel and played in the arcade...and one morning when I took the younger two to eat with princesses and DH and older son went fishing). But maybe just try to keep thinking about ways to keep him interested. Special events, tours, etc. if your family can afford it. Or just talk up the great aspects of something. My son would gladly go to the character buffets because with all the characters and our little ones, we were too busy to notice him eating 5 desserts. ha ha
Or my younger son wanted to ride 7DMT because it is a rollercoaster while my daughter is a little afraid of coasters but LOVES Snow White...there are a lot of things at Disney that can be talked up in different ways. Shopping and Finding Nemo might not be as easy to do, but maybe you can expand his likes some.

 

[smiths02]

There is a shop disney parks app. Maybe you and your mom can look at that while your in line for Splash Mountain?