Imzadi
♥ Saved by an angel in a trench coat!
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2004
He must have called my sister, who immediately called/texted repeatedly, saying this all had to be resolved right away, and instead of answering I texted that I didn't want to talk after my conversation with my brother. Then she immediately got my mother to call & text to really apply the thumbscrews. I ignored those messages, because I am so done with this.
My suggestion is that you should have texted, "This is resolved. I am staying at a B&B and have my own car and driving myself."
By texting, "I didn't want to talk after my conversation with my brother," it may have seemed open ended, that you didn't want to talk NOW. You have a family with enmeshed boundries. Instead of having conversations that begin and end with one family member, talking back & forth directly, and the conversation staying between the two individuals, family members talk to each other and get into each other's business when they shouldn't. Try to end conversations in a way in which firmly ends them. No further discussion about it now or later.
Security expert, Gavin de Becker said, "When a man says 'No' it is the end of a conversation. When a woman says 'No' it is the beginning of a negotiation."
Yet when families have enmeshed boundaries, you may have ended the conversation with one person, but they tell another family member, and that person then thinks they can continue the conversation & negotiation.