What would you do

[mousefan73]

Well call me the ignorant, sheltered white person, but I had to google those other two things.. Holy Moly.. can I say that here?

That would be a red flag for me ( no pun intented)... Conferderate flag for me is a southern thing, that I just roll my eyes at but get how some people hang on to it with out being racist. Now those other two flags tells me to run from this house..

I am curious though for the OP, you say you are hispanic, did you interact with these guys,, how were they to you? In an ideal situation, your hispanic child plays witht this child and teaches her equality. Children are taught hatred.. Not sure if that is realisticly possible.

 

[Skywalker]

Confederate Flag - not a big deal. Some associate it with racism, others do not.

I do have a question for OP, if your wife had no idea what the other flags were, why did she feel compelled to take pictures of them? Did she just assume they were evil in some way? And it is odd for people to keep items like that out obviously showing in a mixed-race neighbourhood. Were they actually like framed and displayed or just kind of "there", as in maybe they are just storing them for like a brother-in-law or friend or whatever and had no idea what they represented (as many people wouldn't, including me, your wife, and most posters here)

I wouldn't write off the family but I may ask them about it. Better than making assumptions!

 

[Wishing on a star]

I also have a question. Just rhetorical.... No expectation of an answer.
OP, think carefully about why you posted here.
As a parent, would you not already know to distance yourself and protect your children from that kind of hatred and prejudice?
Would you really have to ask for guidance or WWYD?
Or, were you, perhaps on some level, just wanting to post something negative about people that you think you hate.
I would also have to wonder about how you go about taking photos in somebodies garage, their house, their property... just because you 'didn't know what something was'. And, "thank goodness you did that".

My own take is that I don't play or negotiate with evil.
It is what it is.

Bottom line here, I just have this to say:
That kind of evil hatred and prejudice is horrible, no matter where it comes from.
And, clearly, it comes from all sides. (nobody has a corner on the market)
That is all....

 

[Wishing on a star]

I'm just here for the inevitable 'Actually, none of those things are bad' comments.

Wow, what a negative and unfounded assumption.
I think that could be called predudice?

 

[dish rag]

Confederate Flag - not a big deal. Some associate it with racism, others do not.

I do have a question for OP, if your wife had no idea what the other flags were, why did she feel compelled to take pictures of them? Did she just assume they were evil in some way? And it is odd for people to keep items like that out obviously showing in a mixed-race neighbourhood. Were they actually like framed and displayed or just kind of "there", as in maybe they are just storing them for like a brother-in-law or friend or whatever and had no idea what they represented (as many people wouldn't, including me, your wife, and most posters here)

I wouldn't write off the family but I may ask them about it. Better than making assumptions!

I find it strange that anyone would take a picture of the inside of someones home with out permission. Even the garage. I don't believe this ever happened. And as someone mentioned, hispanics are white Caucasians.

 

[L&Lfan]

Actually, dish rag, Hispanics can be of any race. For example, racially my boyfriend is white/Caucasian. Ethnically, he is Puerto Rican. On the census he marks Hispanic White. Most people who don’t know him think he’s either Italian, Greek or Jewish.

 

[shelemm]

An entire region of the country can be wrong. The Civil War and the Confederate flag were all about slavery. Displaying it is a tribute to that. So are those statues. And those streets and schools named after slave traders.

My point is: you can be a racist AND hate. But it's not essential. You can even say something nice and be a racist. Like "those colored folks sure can dance." See, a perfectly good compliment. isn't it?

 

[DuskKodesh]

I just... geeze. I dunno what I would do. It's a double edged sword. She could be a really nice little girl that could be a good friend to yours. Given the good influence of your family she may even eventually find her own views and not those of her parents. BUT on the other hand it's not your job to expand her horizons and you could run afoul of the parents which could cause stress and conflict... BUT your little girl might befriend her anyways in class and you'll get into all this anyways.

It's complicated but I'm certain a message board isn't where you'll find your answers. Maybe a school counselor? Or religious leader in your life? Even anyone in your life who works with children for a living?

 

[PollyannaMom]

Not even going to get into a discussion with you about the confederate flag but just know that for an entire region of the country, that isn’t true. No one is promoting slavery. I don’t personally have one nor would I fly one, and I get why it’s offensive to some. But it is not promoting slavery.

Now, it with those other two things, does represent something else entirely...

Exactly the bolded part!

If I saw only the confederate flag, I admit I wouldn't know whether the person was a racist or simply a "Dukes of Hazzard" fan. But I looked up the other things, and the combination definitely makes me assume the flag means something negative as well - at least to this person.

 

[luvsJack]

An entire region of the country can be wrong. The Civil War and the Confederate flag were all about slavery. Displaying it is a tribute to that. So are those statues. And those streets and schools named after slave traders.

My point is: you can be a racist AND hate. But it's not essential. You can even say something nice and be a racist. Like "those colored folks sure can dance." See, a perfectly good compliment. isn't it?

Well one saying “colored folks” is racist so there is that. And that isn’t a compliment it’s a stereotype. And anything like that is said out of ignorance. Not in the same league as the beliefs of the groups represented by two of those items. And I am fairly certain everyone here has heard such statements at some point and are able to recognize them for what they are.

Second you do not get to decide that “a whole region” is wrong. I never said the civil war wasn’t about slavery. The confederate flag isn’t just about the civil war. And you are being just as prejudice toward the people of the region as you are saying anyone else is being about people of color.

You need to keep in mind that the groups those three items together represent, are not representative of the south or her people. Those evil groups are from every little dark corner of this nation. So nothing you are saying here has a whole lot to do with them.

 

[LSUmiss]

Confederate Flag - not a big deal. Some associate it with racism, others do not.

I do have a question for OP, if your wife had no idea what the other flags were, why did she feel compelled to take pictures of them? Did she just assume they were evil in some way? And it is odd for people to keep items like that out obviously showing in a mixed-race neighbourhood. Were they actually like framed and displayed or just kind of "there", as in maybe they are just storing them for like a brother-in-law or friend or whatever and had no idea what they represented (as many people wouldn't, including me, your wife, and most posters here)

I wouldn't write off the family but I may ask them about it. Better than making assumptions!

How’s that conversation go?? Quick question about your neo-nazi paraphernalia? Does that apply to Hispanic ppl or is it just Jewish & black ppl?

 

[LSUmiss]

I also have a question. Just rhetorical.... No expectation of an answer.
OP, think carefully about why you posted here.
As a parent, would you not already know to distance yourself and protect your children from that kind of hatred and prejudice?
Would you really have to ask for guidance or WWYD?
Or, were you, perhaps on some level, just wanting to post something negative about people that you think you hate.
I would also have to wonder about how you go about taking photos in somebodies garage, their house, their property... just because you 'didn't know what something was'. And, "thank goodness you did that".

My own take is that I don't play or negotiate with evil.
It is what it is.

Bottom line here, I just have this to say:
That kind of evil hatred and prejudice is horrible, no matter where it comes from.
And, clearly, it comes from all sides. (nobody has a corner on the market)
That is all....

Are you saying hate on “all sides” is equal?? So hating a neo-nazi is the same as the hate a neo-nazi engages in?

 

[Skywalker]

How’s that conversation go?? Quick question about your neo-nazi paraphernalia? Does that apply to Hispanic ppl or is it just Jewish & black ppl?

It's not rocket science, have you not ever had an uncomfortable conversation before? I would be direct, like "Hey...those flags you have in the garage. Do you know what they represent? Why do you have them? I want our kids to be friends but I can't condone a friendship if these are your beliefs." Then listen to what they say. You know, like human adults should be capable of doing.

 

[RamblingMad]

I’d move. And I hate moving.

The quality of the people around me is super important.

 

[LSUmiss]

It's not rocket science, have you not ever had an uncomfortable conversation before? I would be direct, like "Hey...those flags you have in the garage. Do you know what they represent? Why do you have them? I want our kids to be friends but I can't condone a friendship if these are your beliefs." Then listen to what they say. You know, like human adults should be capable of doing.

That seems odd to me. You would really ask if they know what the flags stand for? That seems more confrontational than direct b/c how can they not. You think they’re gonna say we just thought they had pretty colors that looked nice in the garage?? And, maybe if the OP, were white it might be ok, but I certainly would be intimidated to have that kind of confrontation with someone if I weren’t.

 

[Hikergirl]

It's not rocket science, have you not ever had an uncomfortable conversation before? I would be direct, like "Hey...those flags you have in the garage. Do you know what they represent? Why do you have them? I want our kids to be friends but I can't condone a friendship if these are your beliefs." Then listen to what they say. You know, like human adults should be capable of doing.

I don't know, displaying those things pretty much shows people what your beliefs are right? Sometimes there is no need to ask because the answer is right there in front of your face.

 

[luvsJack]

That seems odd to me. You would really ask if they know what the flags stand for? That seems more confrontational than direct b/c how can they not. You think they’re gonna say we just thought they had pretty colors that looked nice in the garage?? And, maybe if the OP, were white it might be ok, but I certainly would be intimidated to have that kind of confrontation with someone if I weren’t.

I would be intimated too. The thought of people with those beliefs are scary.

But, there could other reasons. Like “we had no idea, they were here when we moved in” or “we didn’t know, his bil brought those things here”. Not sure I would just blindly believe those reasons but there is a small possibility that they didn’t know (well the confederate flag is pretty well known but the other two. I mean most people here had to google them and the op’s Wife didn’t know what they were.

But I also think that if someone has those strong beliefs or opinions, they will likely admit it. If nothing else but saying “well we are just proud of our race” or some such nonsense.

 

[Hikergirl]

That seems odd to me. You would really ask if they know what the flags stand for? That seems more confrontational than direct b/c how can they not. You think they’re gonna say we just thought they had pretty colors that looked nice in the garage?? And, maybe if the OP, were white it might be ok, but I certainly would be intimidated to have that kind of confrontation with someone if I weren’t.

And if it was just one of those things I could see maybe questioning, I had no idea what the 1488 or the other thing was. I thought "stormfront" flag had something to do with boating until I googled.
However the Confederate flag and those 2 other things displayed all together, I think it's pretty clear what kind of things are believed in that home. Why as a non-white person would you even want to confront that man? I would think that would put some kind of target on your back.

 

[LSUmiss]

And if it was just one of those things I could see maybe questioning, I had no idea what the 1488 or the other thing was. I thought "stormfront" flag had something to do with boating until I googled.
However the Confederate flag and those 2 other things displayed all together, I think it's pretty clear what kind of things are believed in that home. Why as a non-white person would you even want to confront that man? I would think that would put some kind of target on your back.

Oh I didn’t know what they were either & can see asking then. But OP does know & pp is suggesting that he should confront the neighbor now.

 

[Hikergirl]

Oh I didn’t know what they were either & can see asking then. But OP does know & pp is suggesting that he should confront the neighbor now.

Yeah, I don;t know who would think that was a good idea.